WhoDeyRevolution

Friday Gamblin'

According to docsports.com the Bengals will be 4.5-5 point underdogs at home on Monday night against the Stillers (depending on the sportsbook).  That's right.  We're 5 point dogs on Monday night at home to a team we beat twice just last year.

Vegas sure thinks we suck. 

I'm inclined to agree.  Haven't seen anything this year that leads me to believe the Bengals will get inspired to play the type of mentally tough game they will need to in order to beat the Steelers.  Also, you have to believe that the stadium, after a nice multi-year streak of keeping Front Runner Nation's fans at bay, will finally again be somewhat more populated with lowest common denominator's waving their silly yellow towels.

I'll take the Steelers to cover.  And 1 gallon of bourbon. 

Folks, it's all over.  But let's relive the good times and have some fun at FOOTBALL TOWN USA's expense.  Read here and here.  For all Steelers bashing, just peruse here.

Oh, and in case it wasn't obvious, we are openly soliciting for Project Mayhem ideas.  There's only one criteria at this point:  it needs to be cheap.  WDR, once gloriously funded by ourselves, occasional solicited fan donations and a few backers, is broke.  No more billboards.  No more airplanes.  No more urinal cakes.  Expenses must be virtually nil.

It's hard to be all mayhemy from your parents basement.

Bill Cowher's Racist Psychotic Chin Analyzes The Bengals Organization From The Top Down

Since the Bengals are Garbage and no one around WhoDeyRev has much to say about this team we're bringing in outside help to diagnose the Bengals organizational problems.

James Harrison Would Like To Serve You A Large Helping Of Douche

He may be good. He may be intense.  He may be intimidating.  But he's also now a douche.  And possibly emo.  Says James Harrison in this article:

I'm going to sit down and have a serious conversation with my coach tomorrow and see if I can actually play by NFL rules and still be effective," Harrison said. "If not, I may have to give up playing football.

Oh Jesus Christ.  There is literally no tackle or defensive play that a player ever made by launching with their helmet as part of the tackle that could not also have been made without launching their helmet.  But let us know how that conversation goes. Douche.

Now I think the NFL enforces all these rules poorly and ambiguously.  For example, watch the video in that article and you will see that all the "analysts" agree Harrison's helmet-to-helmet knock out of Cribbs fits within the rules...yet those types of intentional helmet-to-helmet shots have the most potential to permanently injure a player and it seemed no less dirty to me than the Massaquoi hit.  So they need to make the rules a little clearer and then do the best to enforce them even though there will always be a gray area.

And I'm also aware Harrison clearly has no intention of retiring.  But still.  What a douchey thing to say.  He somehow managed to go from being terrifying to being Jimmy Clausen.

Again, all this tough talk rings hollow to me coming from players who hit with intent to hurt without fear of having anyone do the same to them.  As mentioned earlier, until the NFL figures all this out, I think offenses should retaliate with some of their own tactics.  Design plays that give the offense a chance to lay blind crackblocks on the tough guys who hit them with impunity.  Fuck it, teach them to lead with their helmet and then just call it "toughness".  Maybe these defenders will start to understand what bitches they all sound like.

Update:  for best discussion on these issues check out the Fifth Down Blog posts here, here, and here. For the best discussion of why Steelers players are huge douche bags, stick with us at WDR.

Pennsylvania: Where Bad People Deserve Their Shitty Lives

 

Pickin Games With Uncle Chin

Hi poor people,

WhoDeyRed brought me in to talk about the Bengals Browns "professional football game" happening this Sunday. And after I looked at the matchup I have to go with the Browns. Look at their running back situation. Jerome Harrison made the league his crackpipe at the end of last year. Peyton Hillis is white. So they go with Hillis to get the bulk of the carries this year. That takes some old school, deep south racist stones right there. I have to tip my cap to that sort of cutting off your nose to spite your face personnel decision. High five to whoever on the Browns decided to say, "Fuck Jerome Harrison. What has he done for us lately? And by lately I mean the offseason. You're not going to win a starting job on the Browns by being merely good when real games are happening. You've got to be getting yards in the offseason, not lazing about." 

So yeah, gotta love the Browns for that. As for the Bengals. Jesus. I know I shouldn't be cutting their OC so much slack. But damnit, he's white and old and probably has told a mexican or two to get off his lawn within the last couple hours. So just because he "can't come up with a solid offensive philosophy to save his life" or "tie his own shoes without accidentally hanging himself" everyone thinks he's a bad coach. I think he's a fine coach and I also think he should get some sort of award for his brave decision to try to kill Cedric Benson slowly by running him behind a shitty line 50 times a game. That sort of under the radar racism makes me happy to watch such a horrible offense perform. Now if only Palmer would throw to Shipley more often and not that nightstalker T.O., I could fully get behind this Bengals attack. 

 

Yet Another Steelers Title Invalidated

Historically we have had little to cheer for as Bengals fans.  Thus, we resort to picking apart the successes of other franchises, so that we can feel better about our own inadequacy.  Ok, really just Pittsburgh.

Showtime addressed here how the 70s titles rested largely on the Steelers pioneering the use of steroids.  Now we can cancel out the 2005 title as the official in that game recently apologized for blowing critical calls in the 4th quarter of the Superbowl:

“It was a tough thing for me. I kicked two calls in the fourth quarter and I impacted the game and as an official you never want to do that. It left me with a lot of sleepless nights and I think about it constantly. I’ll go to my grave wishing that I’d been better. I know that I did my best at that time, but it wasn’t good enough. When we make mistakes, you got to step up and own them. It’s something that all officials have to deal with, but unfortunately when you have to deal with it in the Super Bowl it’s difficult.”

The end of blog accurately notes, "only two? (calls)":

The Darrell Jackson pass interference in the first quarter and the upheld Ben Roethlisberger touchdown late in the first half also looked questionable.

That just leaves 1 title to go before Pitt is back swimming in the sewer with us.  We just need a way to invalidate the 2008 title. 

I personally blame 2008 on New England.  Pitt never can get through the playoffs when they have to face NE.  And Brady had no knee in 2008.  Also, their opponent?  Arizona.  Not like they had to go up against the Walsh/Montana 49ers.

If bored and looking for some amusement, perusing the posts of our "pittsburgh where bad people deserve their shitty lives" tag can be a fun distraction.

Well Done

From Chad's dating show last night...

“Man, I haven’t seen this many girls on a football field since the last time we played the Steelers.”

Extreme Home Makeover: Pittsburgh Edition

Shouldn't Jeff Reed be in the locker room getting ready to play? Not out destroying some shitty Pittsburgh family's house. I also like how for about 5 or so seconds there you start to think the guy is dead. No movement whatsoever. I will say, smart move by Reed to wear the leather. You never know when you won't be able to pull yourself up about a foot onto a building and instead go smashing through glass. It's almost as if he's done that before.  

Classless Steelers Organization At It Again

As if all this Big Ben and Santonio kerfuffle wasn't enough, it's being reported on the esteemed investigative sports journalism site Sports Pickle, that the menacingly super fabulous Steely McBeam tried to do some iron smelting of his own.  

No need to worry about Aqua Bengal. He only has consentual underwater autoerotic asphyxiation sex.

It's Limas Sweed's Time To Shine!

You best belee dat.  

Good job Steelers. Not only did you practically give away your best receiver for nothing, but now I don't have to say, "Santonio Holmes is dead to me" whenever I'm talking about my Buckeyes.