WhoDeyRevolution

Annual Playoff Q&A with 'TexansChick' Steph Stradley of Houston Chronicle

In what is apparently becoming an annual tradition, we've done another playoff preview Q&A with the incomparable Steph Stradley of the Houston Chronicle blog TexansChick.  You can find the link here, and a little taste below:

Without question, the Bengals are stronger on the defensive side of the ball. That will probably remain the case as long as DC Mike Zimmer, for reasons unclear to me, continues to not get head coaching offers from the rest of the NFL.

In particular, the Bengals are strong on the defensive line. That is something I have never been able to say as a fan until these last few years. And I have never been able to say that because Geno Atkins did not play on the Bengals. But he does now. And it is glorious.

Go read the whole thing.  

Also, for an incredibly in depth diagnosis of the current state of the Texans, definitely read Steph's piece "My Unified Theory of the 2012 Texans and the Meaning of Life".  You get sophisticated footbaw analysis AND the meaning of life in one post!  Why are you not reading that right now?!

Last, as I haven't posted in some time, I'll throw out a few thoughts on the 2012 Bengals season.

In our season preview for KSK we said there were actually reasons for hope, and for the most part that ended up being correct.  I think there's a ceiling to that hope come the playoffs, but hey, anything can happen I suppose.  If we're talking hope, then looking to the two Giants Superbowl runs is the likely model where a nasty defensive line led the way.  That model also supposes Andy Dalton has Eli Manning upside.  I'll just leave that thought there.

More importantly, as the unofficial watchdog of the Bengals franchise, WDR is pleased to see the team be able to finally sustain success for more than one year.  It's an open question if that sustained success is 1) a function of the recent marginal but significant organizational changes within the Bengals that has led to a better a process, or 2) if the process is still broken and we have just mostly lucked into a nice stretch that is unsustainable.  Likely, it's a little of both and the organization is slowly repairing what was a broken process under Mike Brown for 20 years.

At any rate, our hats are off to the Bengals in 2012.  They resurrected a faltering season and are playing defense at a level I have never seen a Bengals team play in my lifetime.  I only hope the franchise continues their modernization and builds off the foundation they have laid the past few years.  Only time will tell.

Know Your Enemy: Q&A with Houston Chronicle Blogger Steph Stradley (aka "Texans Chick")

Hey folks - Steph Stradley has been kind enough to allow the Comrades at WDR to invade her Texans blog for Q&A ahead of the matchups in recent years vs Houston.  Our most recent preview, for Saturday's playoff game just went live moments ago.  We're returning the favor now (actually for a 2nd time, read her previous Q&A here).  So read on to find out all you ever wanted to know about the Texans from a very passionate and insightful fan.  In case you doubt her credentials, allow me to produce her blogging CV:

Steph Stradley (@StephStradley) is a Houston-based attorney who writes a Texans blog for the Houston Chronicle online and her personal/professional blog here. In 2006, she was voted Ultimate Texan fan, and the Texans sent her to the Super Bowl.

Impressive.  Let's begin.

What in this Texans season is surprising to you?

I thought before the year, even with Peyton Manning healthy, that the Texans were favored to win the AFC South if they stayed healthy. Football Outsiders predicted they would win the division, and they were just predicting an average defense for the Texans.

Though I knew that the Texans defense would improve with competent coaching and key free agent signings, I had no idea that the Texans switch from the 4-3 to the 3-4 would result in this much improvement.

People in Houston love Wade Phillips. The Phillips family has a special place in Houstonian's hearts due to our love of his father Bum. Going from hating watching our defense to loving it in one year, it feels weird but good weird. It was hard hearing that Phillips was getting surgery--you worry for a guy in his 60s. Wade Phillips in his last presser was pretty emphatic about not being satisfied with just getting to the playoffs and wanting to win the whole thing. Going through major surgery will get you thinking about your mortality and how many chances you have left.

Before Matt Schaub's injury, the Texans were playing the sort of balanced football that Gary Kubiak has always wanted to play but hasn't been able to because his defenses for many years were so terrible. Philosophically, the Texans offense is not designed to overpower teams but rather to keep them off balance. It recognizes that more often than not, the defensive players will be more athletic, so to counter that, the offense is designed to look the same whether a play is run or pass. Ideally, the Texans prefer to keep down and distance sane, see what the defense does, and then exploit mismatches to get big plays. They want to get a lead, and then wear defenses down with their running game in the second half, and with their mobile, athletic offensive line.

You Are Witnessing The Complete Disintegration of An Organization. And My Sanity.

(before reading this, go read the Gold Star post below and TAKE THE SURVEY PLEASE, it is very important)

This offseason was bad before the last 48 hours.  In sum, Carson Palmer, the franchise and dominant factor in what limited success the Bengals ever had under Mike Brown, threatened to retire if he wasn't traded and forgoe AN AMOUNT OF MONEY YOU WOULD THAT YOU WOULD MURDER YOUR OWN MOTHER TO HAVE FOR YOURSELF.  In typical dipshit fashion, Mike Brown escalates the stand off and CARSON WILL ACTUALLY FUCKING RETIRE.  AT AGE 31.

\composes self

Ahem.

\reads this, then loses it again completely

Then, THEN, as if voluntarily sending the core of the franchise into early retirement and getting no value in return wasn't enough...free agency hits and the Bengals execute their strategy...which literally amounts to Mike Brown walking out into the middle of PBS and taking a HUGE DUMP ON THE FIELD.  Allow me to explain.

Factoring in that Carson's salary is gone from the books, the Bengals are TENS OF MILLIONS of dollars below the alleged salary floor assuming they keep everyone else on the roster in tact.  FLOOR.  NOT CAP.  FLOOR.  In case you don't understand the implications that means:

1. They either spend money signing free agents (including their own) to get to the floor
2. They don't spend anything, remain below the floor, and pay the difference without any DISCRETION WHATSOEVER BASED ON PLAYER'S MARKET VALUES OR MERITS

The only sane decision is BUY SOME FUCKING FREE AGENTS IN POSITIONS OF NEED.  WHICH IS, LIKE, ALMOST EVERY POSITION.  The Bengals notoriously never spend money in free agency (Coles & Bryant don't count, they were just replacing a departed TJ), but now, for once, they had not just the green light, but a BONAFIDE MANDATE TO SPEND SOME DOLLARS.  Awesome, right?  Well here is what the Bengals have done:

For starters, they traded Chad Johnson for about 90% less than they could have when he asked out YEARS ago.  Think what you will about Chad now, but he was the only remaining veteran presence at WR, he was among the only bright spots in the past 20 years, and he was a MEGA TALENT.  More practically, he would have counted for another $6 million towards the floor, which is $6 million of your fan money that Mike Brown couldn't totally WASTE.  But now we are even further under the floor.

So then, you might think, "okay fine, Chad had long departed in spirit and effort anyway and it was time to move on.  Plus, now we have to spend EVEN more so we can definitely make some moves."  The defense is basically the Bengals only hope.  It contains their only proven elite asset:  their cornerbacks.  GREAT, at least we can fucking lock them both down now since we gotta spend the money.  Nope, Jonathan Joseph will now be a Texan FOR NO LOGICAL REASON AT ALL.  GODDAMMIT.

Chad gone.  JJoe gone.  Now we're even further under the floor again.  AND WE JUST CUT ANTAWN ODOM.  WHO SUCKS NOW BUT WHATEVER WE GOT TO SPEND THE MONEY ANYWAY.  AND SIGNING BRIAN LEONARD IS NOT A SOLUTION. THOMAS HOWARD HAS TWO FIRST NAMES.  HE'S NOT TO BE TRUSTED!!!  AND GRADKOWSKI?  DIE!!!!!!!

I expect lunacy out of the Bengals front office.  It's why this site exists.  But even this behavior goes beyond what I ever thought capable.

Everything that was ever good, however limited, about the Bengals is sprinting for the exits.  The man in charge not only remains uninterested in stopping this exodus, but he actually appears proud to continue causing it by standing by his terminally flawed and hypocritical "principles".  More than that, things have spiraled so far out of control that every single decision the front office is making at this point appears to be the one that maximize the destruction of this Bengals team.  Seriously, every choice they have made so far, from refusing to trade Carson and Chad, to releasing players this free agency (Odom), to failing to resign players despite having overwhelming resources (JJoe), to driving out ones who just want a chance (Mathis)...literally every choice inflicts maximum damage to this team.  They have been bad before.  Oh have they been bad.  But this is a new level.  It is so FUCKED and I see no hope to UNFUCK it.

How do the Bengals even meet the floor at this point?  Our own beat reporter, Joe Reedy says this:

The debt ceiling problem is an easier one to solve

And you know what?  HE'S RIGHT.  What will likely end up happening is that we will blow equal money on mediocre replacements for everyone who has left or Mike Brown refuses to trade, saddling the team with shitty contracts not just this season but in the future, for players we will likely want to stab rather than watch.  And you can bet Mike Zimmer, the best thing besides Carson Palmer to ever happen to Bengaldom, will flee for his life as soon as he can.

I can usually predict to some degree what dumb shit the Bengals will do (think bringing back Chris Henry, signing Pacman, letting Steinbach go, etc.) but this is a more virulent form of asshattery.  It's so mindboggling idiotic that it makes me suspicious.  And the only thing I can think of is that the salary floor is not going to really apply to the Bengals somehow.  No, that can't be, right?  Right?  FUCKING RIGHT??!!!  OMG LOOK AT THIS AND BE AFRAID.

So either the Bengals have finally, after two decades, completely disintegrated in terms of their ability to even function as an organization...or they are cynically dumping salary to simply cash in on a revenue-sharing-without-salary-floor BONANZA.

YOUR TAX DOLLARS AT WORK FOLKS.  THANK GOD IT'S FRIDAY.  I AM GOING TO DRINK AN ENTIRE LITER OF THIS RIGHT NOW.  FUCK.

-----------------------

Important Update:  from Pro Football Talk comes a simple outline of the CBA.  In 2011-2012 teams must spend in aggregate 99% of the salary cap.  So while there is no floor this year, the Bengals would have to make it all up in 2012 by going WAY over the cap if they continue to do nothing.  Verbatim:  "This helps ensure teams that were way under the cap in recent years like the Bengals and Bucs spend more."  The rant above still applies.  <=this entire paragraph likely wrong, will clarify later

Update:  the Bengals have "$49 million of cap room" according to John Clayton.  Also, not only did JJoe walk away, according to Lance the Bengals have waived Morgan Trent and put Pacman on the PUP list.  So now our secondary is Leon Hall, Cris Crocker and Mike Zimmer's icy stare.

In related news, Ray Edwards, a serviceable free agent replacement for Odom, will also not be a Bengal.  He will go Atlanta instead.

\Well, I suppose they might be making a run at Asomugha

\That'd be kind of cool

\Nope.  Bengals are still shit.

Learn You Somethin': Sunday Q&A with Houston Chronicle Blogger Texans Chick

It's the weekend but that does not mean you still cannot make your knowledge grow, right?  Hmmm...you look skeptical.  What if I told you that this football lesson plan comes from a woman who knows more about football than you?  Better, huh.  I thought so.

What follows is a Q&A dialogue with Texans fan and writer Steph Stradley about anything from who you might not know on the Texans that should scare you to why the average Texans players still suffers from high car insurance premiums (they're young).

I'm guessing you're like me, and don't know jack about the Texans, because they've basically been a NFL afterthought (which is funny, cause we root for the Bengals).  So educate yourself. 

Begin Q&A:

(also, you can read my Q&A on her blog too)