WhoDeyRevolution

Meanwhile, Back At Denny's...

Mike Brown fidgets impatiently. His GrandSlamwich hasn't arrived at the table yet. Mike Zimmer strides through the Denny's entrance, the doors blowing open without him even touching them. He looks really fucking angry. He spots Mikey and hurdles over three tables flatfooted to stand in front of him.

Zimmer: You're doing a hell of a job Brownie. 

Mikey: Thanks.

Zimmer: That was a joke you shit stain remover. What the fuck did I tell you about Jones?

Brown: I know you think he's out of sh...

Zimmer: He's shit. And you're shit for bringing him in. You're literally giving me a PB and Shit and telling me there's nothing better. What the fuck is wrong with you?

Brown: First of all, Denny's offers a lot of things at least as good as a PB and Shit. Secondly, I think with your coaching and his newfound work ethic Adam could become a...

Zimmer: A dirt cheap half assed replacement for Joseph or Hall? I will fucking murder you if you let either of them go. I will literally shove a whole western omelet through one of your beady canadian eyeballs and into your brain.

Brown: Calm down now. Here comes our man right now. Adam!  

PacMan: Ain't no reopened Red Cheetah in here. Lyin' motherfucker. 

Brown: Now Adam, there is no party like the one you're going to find on Denny's $4 value menu. 

PacMan: (Looks at Zimmer) What the fuck?

Zimmer: Welcome to the Bengals. Deja Vu is right up the road off 32.  

Not Much to Say That Hasn't Already Been Said

But that won't stop me from chiming in anyway.  Because what I have to say is important!  My opinion carries weight!  People want to hear it!  I drive a Dodge Stratus!

Anyway, we're far enough into the season that the Bengals should not really surprise us anymore.  Certainly that has been the case the last 3 weeks.  Basically every game has been the exact same as the Oakland game.

However, before you expect us to predict more of the same, is it possible this week might be different?  Fellow comrade MikeBrownDelendaEst points out:

Actually, given that San Diego has a horrible run defense (currently ranked 27th by FO), I fully expect the team to win this week, followed by glowing press from Hobspin about how they were committed to the run all along.  If that ends up being the case, then I'm fine with a running mentality.  What is curious about Brat is that he had the same mentality going up against the Vikes, who FO ranks #1 against the run.

Okay - so it's not really that the Bengals will surprise us with a new dimension to their game.  It's that their strengths might match up well with the Chargers weaknesses and result in a surprisingly competitive game compared to everyone's now lowered expectations.

But don't get your hopes up.  I remain unconvinced that San Diego is a more favorable west coast match up than Oakland.

Also, the struggles of Carson Palmer, at least statistically, have taken on a new level of concern.  My thoughts:

• Unlike the rest of the Bengals franchise, I operate from the position that Carson is innocent until proven guilty
• It appeared that beginning with the Chicago game and going into the Ravens game, the offense was really starting to click...and then Chris Henry went down
• Literally, after he went down, beginning with the rest of that very drive, there has been nothing interesting or compelling about the offense...outside of some impressive power rushing on a handful of drives
• The line appears to be getting progressively worse at pass protection or maybe just not getting better...I am not close enough of an observer to tell...I can assure you it is not good though

Conclusion:  enough evidence exists to find Carson innocent.  I'll hold off on relegating Carson to the ranks of average NFL QBs until has decent protection and more than one interesting receiver.

Dear Bills, Please Hire This Man.

The rumors yesterday were that Cowher turned downs the Bills HC job. As awful as Cowher is as a human being, he still isn't idiotic enough to take over that train wreck of a team. But you know who would love to establish the run in a head position? Bob Bratkowski. The dynamic playcaller has waited his turn and now it's Brat's time to shine.