IN THIS TIME of perpetual Cincinnati Bengals incompetence and futility, with zero playoff wins in the nineteen seasons since the WhoDeyRevolution Godfather, Paul Brown, passed away in 1991 and handed the team to his fortunate son, the Despot, Mike Brown;
Introduction
WE, the members of the Who Dey Revolution, in our fervent dedication to the Cincinnati Bengals and fanatical desire to transform our hometown team into perpetual Super Bowl contenders, call for a popular revolution of fans to demand comprehensive reform to the managerial decisions and approach of Cincinnati Bengals ownership, management, staff and players, and hereby call for the adoption of the following Who Dey Revolution Manifesto:
Manifesto Demands
THAT the Mike Brown, Katie Blackburn, Marvin Lewis, along with every other member of the Bengals management, staff and personnel, state publicly to all Bengals fans, “I will do everything in my power to help the Cincinnati Bengals win a Super Bowl;”
THAT Mike Brown will hire a general manager, drastically expand the scouting department and relinquish all control of player personnel;
THAT all training, rehabilitation and medical facilities are considered best-in-class compared to other NFL teams;
THAT the management fill the team only with players who fit the system, both mentally and physically, and are not reluctant to makes changes to player personnel when needed, regardless of cost or loyalty concerns;
THAT offensive and defensive line depth is considered the top priority for all player personnel decisions;
THAT all decisions made by ownership, management, staff and players, both on and off the field, are judged only by this criterion: “Does this help the Cincinnati Bengals win a Super Bowl?”
If you've visited Bengals.com recently to read Baghdad Hob's latest fluff piece on JP Foschi or to get the PIN number for the latest Bengals FanForum (you too can listen in on a glorified conference call!), you undoubtedly know that tickets are still available for Sunday's game against Houston. After all, it's hard to miss Cedric Benson in monotone, reading a cue card, telling you so. WDR has long looked to this weekend as the one where the sellout streak which started in 2003 could end.
We have to let Mike Brown know that five games isn't enough to bring us back after 18 failed years of his leadership. While a 4-1 record and wins over the rest of the division have been nice, it should be a trend, not a treat. Buying tickets and merchandise now only empowers Mikey further. He'll then know that a decent season every few years will be enough to bring us suckers crawling back to the ticket window. NO MORE!
Here's what a presumably drunk Baghdad Hob reports Marvin Lewis had to say about a potential sellout (one giant [sic] tag):
"We wish it would. Hopefully it will," Lewis said. "We replayiog a vey god football team and pur guys areplauig good football right now. We're getting better every time we go out there. Every itme we have meeting we get better. Everttime we go out to practiced we get better.We just have to keep working, hopefully it will get filled up, we'll sell the rest of those tickets…To me it would be more fun to come the stadium instead of sitting at home and watch it, any way."
Seriously, what the hell? "We replayiog a vey god football team and pur guys areplauig good football right now." What. The. Hell. Here's a screengrab for when it gets corrected:
Via Joe Reedy, the Bengals ticket department is panicking about a looming blackout for Sunday's game against the Texans. We at WhoDeyRev have to stress the importance of not buying up those remaining tickets and making Mike Brown less fat and happy than usual. The Bengals are 4-1 in spite of Mike Brown's meddling, not because of it. And anyway, you can buy a 12 of Milwaukee's Best for roughly the same price that you can buy one Miller Lite baby safe bottle at the stadium. Do the right thing people, and don't line Mike Brown's pockets. The more tickets you buy the more Grand Slamwiches he gets to enjoy.
As we continue on our quest to force Mike Brown to instill competence in the front office, it is imperative that we sever all revenue streams to him. While we must continue the boycott and not buy tickets to home games, that doesn't mean you have to stop watching football altogether.
Tonight's final pre-season game against the Colts is blacked out, again, so it will not be aired in the Cincinnati market. Do not fear - WDR has organized a party tonight at BlackFinn Restaurant and Saloon (Vine and 7th Streets, Downtown). This partnership will continue with our kick off bash for next Thursday and every Sunday all season.
Tonight is your first opportunity to purchase an official WDR mug for $4.50 (in honor of the 4 1/2 wins last season) and become an official card-carrying member of the Who Dey Revolution. With the mug, you will get $1 beers all night and during every football Sunday all season.
Tonight, the bar will be showing the Jets and Eagles game at 7 and the Raiders vs Seahawks at 10pm. And tonight is the start of College Football, with Oregon and Boise state at 10:15. And the game will be aired in its entirety at 11:30pm.
Here is what your membership includes:
* WDR Membership Card- which gets you 10% off all non-discounted items at Blackfinn -- good any time, 7 days a week.
* Bring your official WDR 14oz mug back EVERY SUNDAY to get $1 Miller and Coors during the ENTIRE NFL SEASON!
* Cheap appetizers every Sunday when ordering off the official WDR Gameday Menu.
* Enter to win $1,000 worth of cash and prizes to be given away on Thursday, September 10th.
* Enter to win $300 worth of cash, prizes, t-shirts, etc. given away EVERY SUNDAY AT HALFTIME!
On Thursday, September 10th, head to Blackfinn to catch the NFL Regular Season opener as Tennessee invades Heinz Field to take down the defending champion Steelers. Donate $4.50 to get your mug, membership card and enter for a chance to win $1,000 worth of cash and prizes to be given away during the game on September 10th!
Remember, you can continue to bring your mug to Blackfinn EVERY SUNDAY during the season to get these great drink specials, cheap food and a fantastic football atmosphere...not to mention raffles every week at halftime.
Viva la Revolucion!
Comrades of the Revolution:
As we continue on our quest to force Mike Brown to instill competence in the front office, it is imperative that we sever all revenue streams to him. While we must continue the boycott and not buy tickets to home games, that doesn't mean you have to stop watching football altogether.
That is why we are proud to announce Who Dey Revolution Sundays sponsored by Blackfinn Bar & Saloon.
Blackfinn, located downtown on 7th Street between Vine and Walnut, will be the official Who Dey Revolution bar all season long! Blackfinn has great food and drink specials, along with 32 flat-screen tv's so you can catch every single NFL game, every Sunday (except of course, if the Bengals home games are blacked out).
What does this all mean for you? Great question. Starting this Thursday, September 3rd at 7pm, YOU can get a head start on the competition.
By donating just $4.50 (in honor of the 4 1/2 wins last season) you will receive an official WDR mug and become an official member of the Who Dey Revolution.
Here is what your membership includes:
* WDR Membership Card- which gets you 10% off all non-discounted items at Blackfinn -- good any time, 7 days a week.
* Bring your official WDR 14oz mug back EVERY SUNDAY to get $1 Miller and Coors during the ENTIRE NFL SEASON!
* Cheap appetizers every Sunday when ordering off the official WDR Gameday Menu.
* Enter to win $1,000 worth of cash and prizes to be given away on Thursday, September 10th.
* Enter to win $300 worth of cash, prizes, t-shirts, etc. given away EVERY SUNDAY AT HALFTIME!
Continue reading "Who Dey Revolution Game Days at Blackfinn" »
Training camp starts today. Optimism is all over the place, and I understand why. A healthy Carson Palmer, a talented draft class, Chad in a better mood, etc. To some extent it makes sense. But, here at WDR, we have 19 years of Mike Brown's history staring us right in the face, and we look behind the surface level optimism to address how different this Bengals team is than last year's 4-11-1 debacle.
First, Carson Palmer is healthy. Celebrate Good Times!!! Wait a second. How many games did healthy Carson win last year? Never mind. In the words of Drew Rosenhaus - Next Question.
Second, a great draft class? Maybe. But remember, the same bare bones scouting department was responsible for not only evaluating hundreds of college players, but also providing input on the dozens of free agents across the NFL. Also, Andre Smith does not help unless he is in camp. I know most/many of the other first round picks have not signed. So there still is time, and the Bengals have not messed this up yet. But really, deep down, how much confidence do you have that Andre Smith will be in camp, in shape within the week? If he is, kudos to Mikey and the crew. If not, just another piece of evidence why Mike Brown is the most incompetent owner in the history of pro sports.
More after the jump.
20 - Years since the Bengals have won a playoff game
0 - Total number of playoff wins in Mike Brown's tenure as owner
.359 - Bengals regular season winning percentage since Mike Brown took over as owner (115-206-1 in 20 seasons)
29-34-1 - Record since 2005 playoff game vs Steelers
6 - Seasons the Bengals have lost their first six games since 1991. No other team has more than two.
0 - Teams North of Cincinnati without an indoor practice facility
10 - Players arrested in a 14 month span from 2005-2006
32 - Mike Brown's ranking, out of 32, of the "Best Owners in the NFL" by Michael Silver of Sports Illustrated in 2007
458,000,000 - Amount, in dollars, that Hamilton County Taxpayers paid to build PBS
2032 - Year that Hamilton County will have finally paid off its debt on the stadium deal
3 - Total number of non-clerical employees employed in the Bengals scouting department, lowest in the league
747,000,000 - Amount, in dollars, paid in free agency by the Bengals from 1994 - 2005, second worst of all 28 teams in existence for the duration, behind only Arizona
118 – Ranking, out of 118 professional teams, of the “Worst Franchises” in professional sports, as ranked by ESPN the Magazine in 2003.
97 – Ranking, out of 98 general managers in all four major sports with three or more years of experience, of Mike Brown’s performance as a GM, as ranked by Forbes in 2007.
