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Who Dey Revolution Manifesto

  • Preamble

    IN THIS TIME of perpetual Cincinnati Bengals incompetence and futility, with zero playoff wins in the nineteen seasons since the WhoDeyRevolution Godfather, Paul Brown, passed away in 1991 and handed the team to his fortunate son, the Despot, Mike Brown;


    WE, the members of the Who Dey Revolution, in our fervent dedication to the Cincinnati Bengals and fanatical desire to transform our hometown team into perpetual Super Bowl contenders, call for a popular revolution of fans to demand comprehensive reform to the managerial decisions and approach of Cincinnati Bengals ownership, management, staff and players, and hereby call for the adoption of the following Who Dey Revolution Manifesto:

    Manifesto Demands

    THAT the Mike Brown, Katie Blackburn, Marvin Lewis, along with every other member of the Bengals management, staff and personnel, state publicly to all Bengals fans, “I will do everything in my power to help the Cincinnati Bengals win a Super Bowl;”

    THAT Mike Brown will hire a general manager, drastically expand the scouting department and relinquish all control of player personnel;

    THAT all training, rehabilitation and medical facilities are considered best-in-class compared to other NFL teams;

    THAT the management fill the team only with players who fit the system, both mentally and physically, and are not reluctant to makes changes to player personnel when needed, regardless of cost or loyalty concerns;

    THAT offensive and defensive line depth is considered the top priority for all player personnel decisions;

    THAT all decisions made by ownership, management, staff and players, both on and off the field, are judged only by this criterion: “Does this help the Cincinnati Bengals win a Super Bowl?”

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July 29, 2011


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where can you find the survey, other than the link?

i wanted to see if it was on their webpage but i couldn't find it?

It was emailed to Gold Star's "eClub" members.

Pull your sponsorship. Mike brown will not care unti it hits his wallett

Took the survey to suggesting for them to pull their sponsorship. Any more surveys you need me to take to help the cause of Whodey Revolution, I am willing. Especially after another embarrassing offseason!

Bengals make me want to vomit, Gold Star makes me want to diarrhea.

Gold Star can sponsor my daily bowel movements. I'll give a better price and they are still basically sponsoring the same thing.

WDR - You should attempt to contact marketing executives at all of the Bengals major sponsors. If any other sponsors can be convinced to do some research on how their community reacts to Benglas sponsorship we may be able to have an effect. Every dime i can help take out of MBB's pokect is time well spent.

Maybe a project mayhem - you guys draft a general "why sponsorship hurts your brand letter" and give us a bunch of contacts & mailing addresses - WDR fans mail them out, i know i would send multiple.

I don't care what the motivation is by Gold Star to conduct this survey in such a blatant, public and manner in which it embarrasses Mike Brown, it's beautiful. And yes I took the survey and basically said ANYONE who supports Mike Brown in ANY way is an enemy to true Bengal fans. Pull your sponsorship! God this franchise wreaks of ineptitude. As they said of the Bengals on Mike and Mike this morning: "Complete disaster."
Your most humble and loyal servant,
P.S. I long for the relief death will bring!

It says a lot when a fucking hot dog vender wishes to withhold their sponsorship. Props to Gold Star.

Just took the survey and politely told them that I refuse to support the Bengals financially as well as those who do financially support the team. Also that the community is growing more and more frustrated with the Bengals not only because of the losing, but because of things like the stadium issues.

The key to completing this survey is to be polite when responding to their "why" questions and to not sound rude, ignorant, etc.


Skyline is better. Just saying.

Completely agree with Brown Stain Bratty--- just completed the survey and respectfully provided my opinion from a business stand point. They will not take the results seriously if you are just basing your inputs on raw emotions.

For the record...this is a survey that Gold Star Chili does every football season. This is nothing new and nothing more than basic due diligence; a brand gaining a better understanding of what its core customers are thinking. These are issues that are out there in the media and talked about daily, so it would be irresponsible for Gold Star to invest heavily in a sponsorship and not want to know how it affects our customers' decision-making and to what extend the sponsorship should be leveraged in our advertising and marketing initiatives.

For the record, Gold Star Chili has a long-term relationship with the Cincinnati Bengals and no plans to end the sponsorship. Thanks to all who took our ANNUAL survey.

Sounds like Charlie Howard got a WTF? call from Mikey Boy Brown and got scared Skyline might steal his sponsorship spot.

"Rewarding bad behavior is never ideal. In this case, it would be detrimental to your brand. Partnering/advertising with Cincinnati-based Pure Romance would be better publicity than publicly linking your company to the Cincinnati Bengals. I say this as a life-long fan with closets full of who-dey gear. Please withhold sponsorship until the team makes decisions that support achievement, rather than complacency."

Well Charlie, we understand that you have a relationship with the Bengals, but as I said in my survey answers - I (and the vast majority of people on this site) refuse to financially support Mike Brown and those who financially support him. So that means you can count all of us as people who you will NOT be seeing in a Gold Star Chili restaurant. And while that might not be an extremely huge number of people, we are not alone and the city as a whole is growing more and more frustrated with the Bengals and their operations.


So Charlie, you state your questions in this manner every year? Why have we not heard of this before? If you continue to support this inept owner's ways than good luck getting people to come to your business. I know if you continue to support this man's ways than I will never buy your product ever again and I will tell my relatives that live all over the city and county to do the same. Yea, this may be only 10 to 20 people, but this is a start. Also, your ADs will not even be shown if the games are BLACKED OUT so who will see them? The only people who will see them will be the 20,000 SHEEP that continue to buy into MFB's ways that attend the games! Man, your business will surely pick up. LOL

Fuck you, Charlie.

sponsoring the Bengals is like sponsoring Charlie Sheen or other similar car wrecks.


I just ate Gold Star and I'm posting from my toilet while I shit all over the place. Gold star needs to wipe their collective ass with their Bengals sponsorship contract, like I'm about to do.

This article made it to Deadspin!

Forget over-paid sports teams. NOT WORTH IT.

"Help Gold Star Chili asses the value of its Cincinnati Bengals Sponsorship"

OK, what am I reading here, is it:


Help! Gold Star Chili *ASSES* the value of its Cincinnati Bengals Sponsorship!

(evidently "ass" is also a verb, and Gold Star Chili has found a way to "ass" something, i.e. the value of its Cincinnati Bengals Sponsorship in this case, and, they need our help in the matter)


or, is it a dual imperative
(in classic newspaper headline style, no less):


"Help Gold Star Chili *ASSES*, the value of its Cincinnati Bengals Sponsorship" ,

as in:

Help Gold Star Chili ASSES,
[ i.e "and also",
i.e. perhaps at the same time,
nay, maybe even by very definition]
the value of its Cincinnati Bengals Sponsorship


And thus concludes today's dissertation on the writer's craft. Good Day to all of you, and happy dissertating, writing, and crafting (and craft brewing, and drinking).

And now, an exciting new discovery
in the world of mathematics,

introducing Charlie's Theorem:

Gold Star Chili ASSES = the value of its Cincinnati Bengals Sponsorship

btw, The above was posted by Sir Isaac "Fig (it's-not-like-you-all-haven't-been-thinking-it-anyway-where's-the-milk)" Newton

Also, don't bother fixing it Gold Star, too late;
I already have a screen shot of it...

To quote Peter Gabriel:

Don't you know you're going to "Shock The Survey Monkey" ?

I think Charlie made the survey, since he also spelled "extent" incorrectly, in his above 'damage-control' post, instead posting the word "extend"...which is a word (a verb in fact), but again is not the correct spelling of "extent", a noun (and object in this case) which is the word (and part-of-speech) demanded, by the context of the sentence in Charlie's "Hey-it's-just-an-annual-survey" post.

Is it *at all possible*, that Gold Star meant to use the word, which is the verb "assess", and not the plural noun, and/or "creative verb" they opted to use instead?

I live in Fl where gold star doesn't exist but I'll tell you what has 2 stores in Clearwater, SKYLINE CHILI baby! Love heading over there every few weeks to get the finest Cincinnati chili. I have no idea who this Charlie dude is but stfu! These guys are spot on, mike brown flipped out and you jackasses tried spinning your little survey as s.o.p. Bullshit! Now you look as we would all expect a leading bengals sponsor to appear; confused, embarassed....CLUELESS. I may be in the minority but I believe this just may be a perfect match of loser brands. Grab your gold star chili and come watch the bengals get their teeth kicked in! Now that sounds like a good time.

Charlie, pull some of those adv dollars in and invest in quality control. Your product tastes like it got spilled out of a cow's ass.

Charlie, wtF? Why in the hell would you put together a survey if you already knew from the get go that Gold Star has "no plans to end the sponsorship"??????????????? Man now you have just ticked me off-- I just spent time taking your survey, and now for what? Your post....... aaaaarrrghhhhhh! And I am a PR person also! I can't believe that a PR person just said the stuff you said.

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If only I had known that the solution was successful application of the skill and knowledge learned in the training. Setting expectations, observing staff and giving them feedback, and holding people accountable to demonstrate the expected behaviors were also important means to changing results. While I did focus on these things, I didn't do it enough.

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Outdoor dining is such an obvious plus for downtown.

What are your business objectives with this sponsorship? I believe you have a long term deal with the Bengals, so this survey is simply a manner of which you collect data to help you justify your sponsorship purchase through (one metrix) this survey. You are doing your valuation of the sports property investment.

I think you have a distinct advantage here in that, the value of this sponsorship property could be low, keeping your ROI high, and your ROO effective. How I might employ your position is focus on activation to turn fan attitudes towards a positive outlook when connecting your brand to the Bengals. Find ways to build bridges with the fans despite the team's struggles. The sponsorship is just the conduit to build your own name into profits, earnings, positive community reflection, but only through your own investment of activation of your sponsorship partnership will you reach your goals and objectives.

I'm a pro (MSA) masters of sports administration student at Ohio University. I have owned my own sports sponsorship agency in Chicago for over 15 years. Hopefully we can connect in business.

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    Bengals Futility - By The Numbers

    • 20 - Years since the Bengals have won a playoff game

      0 - Total number of playoff wins in Mike Brown's tenure as owner

      .359 - Bengals regular season winning percentage since Mike Brown took over as owner (115-206-1 in 20 seasons)

      29-34-1 - Record since 2005 playoff game vs Steelers

      6 - Seasons the Bengals have lost their first six games since 1991. No other team has more than two.

      0 - Teams North of Cincinnati without an indoor practice facility

      10 - Players arrested in a 14 month span from 2005-2006

      32 - Mike Brown's ranking, out of 32, of the "Best Owners in the NFL" by Michael Silver of Sports Illustrated in 2007

      458,000,000 - Amount, in dollars, that Hamilton County Taxpayers paid to build PBS

      2032 - Year that Hamilton County will have finally paid off its debt on the stadium deal

      3 - Total number of non-clerical employees employed in the Bengals scouting department, lowest in the league

      747,000,000 - Amount, in dollars, paid in free agency by the Bengals from 1994 - 2005, second worst of all 28 teams in existence for the duration, behind only Arizona

      118 – Ranking, out of 118 professional teams, of the “Worst Franchises” in professional sports, as ranked by ESPN the Magazine in 2003.

      97 – Ranking, out of 98 general managers in all four major sports with three or more years of experience, of Mike Brown’s performance as a GM, as ranked by Forbes in 2007.

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