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Who Dey Revolution Manifesto

  • Preamble

    IN THIS TIME of perpetual Cincinnati Bengals incompetence and futility, with zero playoff wins in the nineteen seasons since the WhoDeyRevolution Godfather, Paul Brown, passed away in 1991 and handed the team to his fortunate son, the Despot, Mike Brown;

    Introduction

    WE, the members of the Who Dey Revolution, in our fervent dedication to the Cincinnati Bengals and fanatical desire to transform our hometown team into perpetual Super Bowl contenders, call for a popular revolution of fans to demand comprehensive reform to the managerial decisions and approach of Cincinnati Bengals ownership, management, staff and players, and hereby call for the adoption of the following Who Dey Revolution Manifesto:

    Manifesto Demands

    THAT the Mike Brown, Katie Blackburn, Marvin Lewis, along with every other member of the Bengals management, staff and personnel, state publicly to all Bengals fans, “I will do everything in my power to help the Cincinnati Bengals win a Super Bowl;”

    THAT Mike Brown will hire a general manager, drastically expand the scouting department and relinquish all control of player personnel;

    THAT all training, rehabilitation and medical facilities are considered best-in-class compared to other NFL teams;

    THAT the management fill the team only with players who fit the system, both mentally and physically, and are not reluctant to makes changes to player personnel when needed, regardless of cost or loyalty concerns;

    THAT offensive and defensive line depth is considered the top priority for all player personnel decisions;

    THAT all decisions made by ownership, management, staff and players, both on and off the field, are judged only by this criterion: “Does this help the Cincinnati Bengals win a Super Bowl?”

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March 16, 2011

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They forgot to include the cost of the jerseys they were wearing as well as other merchandise they likely bought.

Jeff, that would be in the 'Merchandise' section. $3,500. That would cover quite a few jerseys.

oops. My bad. That would be true.

Yeah, good luck with that fella's.

what a douche, do you really believe they sent the letter expecting MIke and the gang to acquiesce? And making something plural doesn't require the use of an apostrophe. HAHAHAHAHA, sometimes it feels good to be petty! Anyway, I saw this on 19 and thought, "Love it, the Brown family collectively owes this city about 1000 times that much for the last 21 years."

Long time reader, first time poster.. I decided to part ways with my tickets this year as well... I went to nearly every game from 03-07 with my father in law and brothers in law, then bought tickets and seat license in 07 until this year. I sold every ticket but 2 games the last 2 years, but this offseason I decided I'd had enough. The only reason I kept them 2 years ago was because I didn't want to lose the seat license money. Then I received those awesome trading cards and a heartfelt letter from Marv telling me how "the Bengals are one of only 3 teams to win a divisional championship the last 10 years and NOT lose a road playoff game"... or something like that. I hope the stadium is empty and every game is blacked out, forcing me to listen to the upbeat, positive stylings of lap and brad for 1 more year... I'm rambling. Finally, Go Reds.

First time I tuned in for several days -- nothing has changed. Mike Brown continues with his Louis XIV imitation, and Cincinnati continues to fail in its search for a guillotine.

Maybe a future Project Mayhem action plan could be a take off on storming the Bastille. Fans with pitchforks and torches could approach PBS on game day, force security to unlock the gates and allow all fans to rush out before being forced to witness another loss.

Long time reader, first time poster.. I decided to part ways with my tickets this year as well... I went to nearly every game from 03-07 with my father in law and brothers in law, then bought tickets and seat license in 07 until this year. I sold every ticket but 2 games the last 2 years, but this offseason I decided I'd had enough.

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    Bengals Futility - By The Numbers

    • 20 - Years since the Bengals have won a playoff game

      0 - Total number of playoff wins in Mike Brown's tenure as owner

      .359 - Bengals regular season winning percentage since Mike Brown took over as owner (115-206-1 in 20 seasons)

      29-34-1 - Record since 2005 playoff game vs Steelers

      6 - Seasons the Bengals have lost their first six games since 1991. No other team has more than two.

      0 - Teams North of Cincinnati without an indoor practice facility

      10 - Players arrested in a 14 month span from 2005-2006

      32 - Mike Brown's ranking, out of 32, of the "Best Owners in the NFL" by Michael Silver of Sports Illustrated in 2007

      458,000,000 - Amount, in dollars, that Hamilton County Taxpayers paid to build PBS

      2032 - Year that Hamilton County will have finally paid off its debt on the stadium deal

      3 - Total number of non-clerical employees employed in the Bengals scouting department, lowest in the league

      747,000,000 - Amount, in dollars, paid in free agency by the Bengals from 1994 - 2005, second worst of all 28 teams in existence for the duration, behind only Arizona

      118 – Ranking, out of 118 professional teams, of the “Worst Franchises” in professional sports, as ranked by ESPN the Magazine in 2003.

      97 – Ranking, out of 98 general managers in all four major sports with three or more years of experience, of Mike Brown’s performance as a GM, as ranked by Forbes in 2007.

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