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Who Dey Revolution Manifesto

  • Preamble

    IN THIS TIME of perpetual Cincinnati Bengals incompetence and futility, with zero playoff wins in the nineteen seasons since the WhoDeyRevolution Godfather, Paul Brown, passed away in 1991 and handed the team to his fortunate son, the Despot, Mike Brown;


    WE, the members of the Who Dey Revolution, in our fervent dedication to the Cincinnati Bengals and fanatical desire to transform our hometown team into perpetual Super Bowl contenders, call for a popular revolution of fans to demand comprehensive reform to the managerial decisions and approach of Cincinnati Bengals ownership, management, staff and players, and hereby call for the adoption of the following Who Dey Revolution Manifesto:

    Manifesto Demands

    THAT the Mike Brown, Katie Blackburn, Marvin Lewis, along with every other member of the Bengals management, staff and personnel, state publicly to all Bengals fans, “I will do everything in my power to help the Cincinnati Bengals win a Super Bowl;”

    THAT Mike Brown will hire a general manager, drastically expand the scouting department and relinquish all control of player personnel;

    THAT all training, rehabilitation and medical facilities are considered best-in-class compared to other NFL teams;

    THAT the management fill the team only with players who fit the system, both mentally and physically, and are not reluctant to makes changes to player personnel when needed, regardless of cost or loyalty concerns;

    THAT offensive and defensive line depth is considered the top priority for all player personnel decisions;

    THAT all decisions made by ownership, management, staff and players, both on and off the field, are judged only by this criterion: “Does this help the Cincinnati Bengals win a Super Bowl?”

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« What's That? You Wanted to Talk About Carson? | Main | How Low Can They Go? »

January 24, 2011


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I'm gueesing Carson's contract is typical in regards to retirement; oh well, it was a thought (retiring-then-unretiring-to-play-elsewhere), without that option,

* I also vote for the retirement of Carson,
and then the return of Fat Carson, maybe in a few years




All I hope is that he publicly announces ALL the failures that he has witnessed over 8 years in this FO. Don't care if he comes back, or if he has to pay some of his signing bonus back, just PLEASE Carson, tell the media why you are so tired of playing for this team.

How about a three team trade between us, the 49ers and the Eagles.
49ers get Carson, hopefully we get there 1st round pick, and trade it and something else for Kevin Kolb. New start for everyone, everybody wins.

Bengals play-by-play announcer Brad Johannsen tweeted that Carson made numerous requests to Mike Brown for changes and was told that none would be made, so he wants out.

Maybe we should be praising him a bit more on this situation if this is true. I don't see why it wouldn't be true.

I hope he does retire. I think if this is done after about two years MFB would be ready to trade him. I just hope he really goes through with it and that more players let the Bengals know not to draft them because the do not want anything to do with the Bengals.

I really hope he will do the right thing and not get scared and stay like Marvin did.

Marvin stated just the other day that they don't know who they are as a team. I can't believe that after 8 years of running the show this is where he has taken them and what makes it worse is the attitude from MFB and Marvin when stating that were close to getting to the super bowl. It's fucking crazy..

When I first heard about this I was ecstatic.

As a day or so has gone by it has become so very clear just how fucked we are.

1. Carson gets traded. (not gonna happen)

MFB gets to go quarterback shopping in the NFL draft again.

Result = Team sucks for 20 more years

2. Carson retires. (I hope he does and breaks his entire foot off in MFB's "craw")

MFB gets to go quarterback shopping in the NFL draft again.

Result = team sucks for 20 more years

3. Carson returns!

But under Brats playcalling, and MFB's offensive line he regresses or is pummeled lower than he is now.

Result = team sucks for 20 more years

Really why do you want him back. He's coached to play like shit, he's one hit to the knee or elbow away from retirement, and...... Your leader just said I want out. So let's force him back.

You see. We're even more fucked than we thought when the best case is he returns unhappy or executing (yes that's a funny way to describe it) brats offense.

And right now, that IS the best case. Because anything is better than the next Klingler-Smith waste of time.

Mr. Brown, I would be very "keen" if you peacefully passed away soon.


i don't post much, but i 1st want to say kudos to you that have lofted the torch- a beacon of truth in the cold cincitucky air.

i don't know what to do. i was repulsed to the verge of mass vomit seeing mike brown's face on espn. i want him to die. but alas i am generally a law abiding citizen.

curseofbo- i hope you are right in that carson publicly declares his reasoning & sheds light on the plight of every bengal coach, player & fan. is there anyway to contact him? how do we urge him to speak- to tell the world that the emperor has no clothes (or brain or heart or soul...)???

who d'eytat indeed

: )

This only ends one way. I know it had the catchy hook of a hollywood flick, but it will end with the banality of Bengaldom.

Palmer returns with his tail between his legs.

Carson doesn't have enough fortitude to pop a zit, much less walk away from that type of cash. Mikey won't trade him and that's no bluff.

He'll probably persuade Carson the same way he persuaded Marvin (I don't *even* want to know all the details)...and, just like Marvin,
Carson will come back and do a press conference, during which, every now and then, he'll be looking like he's trying not to laugh...

I really hope that doesn't happen though...

I think the results of the playoffs for the Superbowl are especially stinging to Carson, and I think he's tired of investing himself mentally, physically, and emotionally (animated as he is : ) )...

Just as an aside, there is a reason that they make players file retirement papers -- to guard against this sort of thing. They can't just say "I am leaving" when they want to so that they can string a team out etc. At one time I knew of the current (at least then it was current) way that they dealt with this so that neither owner nor player could 'play' this type of game -- at least in regards to costs to the team etc.

In the end, if CP tried to play this game, MBMBB doesn't have to hire him back to play -- he (MBMBB) does not give up his rights to said player, MBMBB (if memory serves) has to pay the player per the contract but there is not an overall hit to the team. Gawd, I just wish that I could remember how that went. Who knows, it may not be relevant now.

I hope everyone supports the team down the street from Mikey @ GABP.

I fully support CP in this endeavor. It would be awesome if a new CBA or lockout or something could also get him out of his Mike Brown's endured servitude (no offense, I know he is already super wealthy and well-off). Also, could players retire and play in the UFL? Or if they are locked out? Am I the only person that likes that possibility? Surely the NFL contracts are not that dickish.

Think about it, get to pick a new favorite team, if the UFL takes off then no more Steelers, etc.


Glad to see you worked in your inane, nonsensical, unamusing nickname abbreviation for Mike Brown along with your inane, nonsensical, unamusing drivel about retirement papers.

Those same retirement papers are so effective that Captain Cockshot, aka the Dongslinger, has filed them three times now and to date they haven't actually done a damned thing. In fact, AS WAS MENTIONED IN THE "UPDATE" PORTION OF THE ARTICLE ABOVE, Favre actually used those self-same retirement papers to leverage the Jets into granting him a release, EXACTLY WHAT YOU SAID THEY PREVENTED A PLAYER FROM DOING.

Does it hurt to be as stupid as you? Or is your life so blissfully ignorant that you don't know any better?

C'mon, Carson, do it

*** DO IT ***

I wanna see it go down so bad

Fuck MFB

Cut 'em away Carson

endured servitude? I O'Sullivan'd that one. Swear I'm not drunk.

Yea, but the CBA is null and void, right? If so, then that retirement paragraph does not exist and Carson can do whatever he wants, right? If he puts in retirement paperwork then what rules does he actually have to follow? I am sure there is a loop hole and most agents will find them.

To the insane person who thinks we gat a 1st rounder for Carson. We would be lucky to get a 4th for Pick 6 Palmer.

Even NFL players are no exemption to financial decline after they retire from the sport. They are not businessman and a majority are fitting to the case of lottery winners. The NFL should have classes on how to manage finances after their retirement.

Even NFL players are no exemption to financial decline after they retire from the sport. They are not businessman and a majority are fitting to the case of lottery winners. The NFL should have classes on how to manage finances after their retirement.

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    Bengals Futility - By The Numbers

    • 20 - Years since the Bengals have won a playoff game

      0 - Total number of playoff wins in Mike Brown's tenure as owner

      .359 - Bengals regular season winning percentage since Mike Brown took over as owner (115-206-1 in 20 seasons)

      29-34-1 - Record since 2005 playoff game vs Steelers

      6 - Seasons the Bengals have lost their first six games since 1991. No other team has more than two.

      0 - Teams North of Cincinnati without an indoor practice facility

      10 - Players arrested in a 14 month span from 2005-2006

      32 - Mike Brown's ranking, out of 32, of the "Best Owners in the NFL" by Michael Silver of Sports Illustrated in 2007

      458,000,000 - Amount, in dollars, that Hamilton County Taxpayers paid to build PBS

      2032 - Year that Hamilton County will have finally paid off its debt on the stadium deal

      3 - Total number of non-clerical employees employed in the Bengals scouting department, lowest in the league

      747,000,000 - Amount, in dollars, paid in free agency by the Bengals from 1994 - 2005, second worst of all 28 teams in existence for the duration, behind only Arizona

      118 – Ranking, out of 118 professional teams, of the “Worst Franchises” in professional sports, as ranked by ESPN the Magazine in 2003.

      97 – Ranking, out of 98 general managers in all four major sports with three or more years of experience, of Mike Brown’s performance as a GM, as ranked by Forbes in 2007.

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