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Who Dey Revolution Manifesto

  • Preamble

    IN THIS TIME of perpetual Cincinnati Bengals incompetence and futility, with zero playoff wins in the nineteen seasons since the WhoDeyRevolution Godfather, Paul Brown, passed away in 1991 and handed the team to his fortunate son, the Despot, Mike Brown;

    Introduction

    WE, the members of the Who Dey Revolution, in our fervent dedication to the Cincinnati Bengals and fanatical desire to transform our hometown team into perpetual Super Bowl contenders, call for a popular revolution of fans to demand comprehensive reform to the managerial decisions and approach of Cincinnati Bengals ownership, management, staff and players, and hereby call for the adoption of the following Who Dey Revolution Manifesto:

    Manifesto Demands

    THAT the Mike Brown, Katie Blackburn, Marvin Lewis, along with every other member of the Bengals management, staff and personnel, state publicly to all Bengals fans, “I will do everything in my power to help the Cincinnati Bengals win a Super Bowl;”

    THAT Mike Brown will hire a general manager, drastically expand the scouting department and relinquish all control of player personnel;

    THAT all training, rehabilitation and medical facilities are considered best-in-class compared to other NFL teams;

    THAT the management fill the team only with players who fit the system, both mentally and physically, and are not reluctant to makes changes to player personnel when needed, regardless of cost or loyalty concerns;

    THAT offensive and defensive line depth is considered the top priority for all player personnel decisions;

    THAT all decisions made by ownership, management, staff and players, both on and off the field, are judged only by this criterion: “Does this help the Cincinnati Bengals win a Super Bowl?”

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« Keep An Eye Out for This | Main | Letter to Season Ticket Holders »

January 22, 2011

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Chris, 100 level: I'm not loosing $1000 in COA fee's just to return when Mike Brown "decides to do the right thing" I enjoy the games win or loose; I would rather them win but I enjoy the game anyway. I am a Bengals fan not. A Mike Brown fan but he owns the team, I can't change that and giving up your season ticket ain't gonna change it either. I support you in what your trying to do but I want to see my Bengals play all 16 games and for that I need tickets to the home games. No disrespect: thanks for the upgrade. WhoDey!

Chris: thanks for taking the time to write even if you don't agree with what we advocate here at WDR. But just know man, Mike Brown thrives off that very decision you just made as it allows him to keep losing without consequence. He's treating you like a chump and playing you for a fool. I may like the Bengals, but I am not going to let that clown treat me like a chump. And I hope you don't either even if it means, in the future, should he do right by our city, you have to pay up again for a seat license.

Think about all the money you'll save between now and then from not buying tickets. When the time comes when the Bengals deserve your money, you'll be able to afford it no problem.

No, Chris, you are exactly the reason Mike Brown does what he does and won't change. You think nothing would change if PBS was practically empty? You're a damn fool (no disrespect).

i can't being to tell you how fucking pissed off i am right now. i am absolutely astonished at the reasoning for people who renew.

the reason why we have to put up with fuck-face-mike-brown is because people want to hang out with their friends on sundays? really?

really??? go to a bar. join a chat room. find a new way to hang out with your loser phony friends you rich phony bastards. is there no other way you can interact with people other than 8 sunday tailgates?

is it really worth watching the bengals go with a .350 winning percentage in 20 years? ZERO playoff wins in 20 YEARS. AND YOU LOVE WATCHING THE BENGALS PLAY WIN OR LOSE? FUCK YOU.

thanks enablers. Because you can't find friends, i have to put up with this shit.

There's a sucka born every minute.
Two, in Cincinnati.


I haven't read the this whole latest blog entry (or the responses), but it's awesome that Reedy's already getting results...it's already been said, but again, that was a great idea...gonna go read now...

Chris, tell us all what a Cover 2 is? That is what i thought. Enjoy the circus!

OK, I will address this ONE BY ONE!

Toolbag #1
Scott (100 level): I am a business man just like Mike Brown. Mike Brown gets a return on investment when he fields a team, no matter if they win or lose. I do not get a return on investment when they consistently lose. Seeing a winner 2 times in the past decade is not worth it for me. If I gave money to an outfit who did a lot of the right things to assure the fans that winning is a priority, I would stay. However, this organization cuts nearly every corner possible to maximize profit, not my entertainment. Bengals season tickets are a bad investment of my money and time.

First thing first -- you are NOT a businessman -- just like MBMBB. It is a different business requiring far different things than the average businessman has to deal with. Working at Chacquita Brands is a totally different thing than working as an NFL owner. Owning a Petfood Paradise has NOTHING to do with owning an NFL franchise (aside from signing checks and a few other asundries). So right off the bat, dear Scott is comparing 'apples to oranges' and he needs to stop right there. He is making a comparison that he is ill-equipped to make -- namely because the parts of these comparison bear NOTHING of semblance to what he does -- unless of course, dear Scott happens to own an NFL franchise. Now, aside from that...

Dear Scott is assuming that MBMBB is in it for the profit. Newsflash Scotty-my-boy... ...MBMBB has enough money that long ago -- back when Daddy was alive -- all he cared about was that his 'business' was in the red. He didn't care how much. He knew he had enough money already that he would never be in the want for it so he has no drive needed to acquire more. The only thing that drives him is to make a profit. Whereas, you -- me -- etc., we would try (assumedly) to make the most money that we can, that's not what drives MBMBB -- thus you are thinking like an average businessman dear Scott -- that is not what MBMBB thinks like -- ergot, you aren't even in the same dimension with him -- however, you are making choices about him under those thoughts in your dimension. Go to MBMBB's place and start looking at things as to how he does it -- you will find that all of your argument may make NORMAL business sense but has NO relevance to MBMBB's world and the way he acts within it.

You say that they do everything to maximize profit -- you'd be wrong. Again, 1 penny in the red and MBMBB (in his mind) is successful. This stuff is not done to gain profit or maximize it in any way -- that's how you'd look at a nomrla person pulling the same shit as MBMBB -- you can't do that. MBMBB is different -- it is like he is operating on a different scale than everyone else -- to be truthful, he is. For instance, you think that in a competitive atmosphere, winning is the measure on your value. For Mike, the compeitive atmosphere is if "I made a profit" -- not how much, but ONLY if I DID make one. So MBMBB doesn't give a flip if his team wins -- albeit it is nice if they do -- but that isn't what he looks at to guage success. Hence, apples and oranges. About the only thing you've said right is that the tickets are a bad investment etc. But even in this, on MBMBB's scale, you don't mean anything to him.

As I've said in the past, MBMBB could lock the stadium down right now -- no fans whatsoever -- and he still could make at least a penny of profit through the NFL -- so NO ticket holder -- or the whole lot of them, could make a dent into MBMBB's thought process.

Schnuck #2

Nick (100 level): What Mike Brown does not understand is that no one blames him for being old-fashioned. Loyalty is an exceptional trait. No one hates him for being tight with money; that is usually a good quality no matter one’s circumstances, rich or poor. His heart-felt desire to “redeem” players who may have made mistakes off the field is truly a noble thing. Again, what Brown doesn’t know is that if he would just change, put someone capable and competent in charge of football operations, and bring this franchise into the 21st century (which would result in long-term success), this city would build monuments to him. They would name their children after him. All the hate and vitriol you see today could become love and respect. The amazing thing is, it wouldn’t take long.

What YOU don't understand is that MBMBB doesn't give a fuck about what you think he ought to understand and blame and any of that shit. Tricky Nicky... you need to understand one thing: STFU and watch the game -- or not, I don't care -- at least that's the attitude that you aren't seeming understand.

Redeeming players really means nothing in the scheme of things other than to keep their salaries low (Hey, I gave you a job when you have nothing, you will take $300,000 and be glad for it!). We are talking about the need to do the things to win. Redeeming people doesn't mean a fucking thing other than to obfuscate the situation -- PERIOD! And guess what, my Darling Nicky -- you were obfuscated!

You stated, Nick the Quick, that if he did... ...things, he would have long-term success. How long is "LONG"? The guy has had the team since the mid-80's and he has grown a team worth from $85 million to ten times that amount $850,000. He's had the team long enough and he's profited (in total net worth) more than you could EVER imagine. No, Nicklebrain, what you are saying is that YOU will confer to him the title of: long-term success. Who the fuck are you? My bet is that you've probably never held more than $50,000 in your hands -- and you are going to tell this guy (MBMBB) that 'You're a success -- or not?' How fucking conceited of you. And again, how much this shows that yet another knucklehead doesn't get it -- yet thinks himself important enough to tell MBMBB how it is. You are thinking with your asshole, 'pahdna' -- certainly not your brains! MBMBB will send you this message -- STFU, you haven't got a clue -- the stadium is better without you being there. NEXT!

Toolbag #3

Steve (200 level): The final tipping point was finally recognizing my own insanity. It occurred after reading the transcript to the bizarre press conference in which it was evident that I am insane to keep paying for season tickets in anticipation that the Bengals will consistently win under Mike Brown’s control. Questionable personnel decisions (the Houshmandzadeh-Coles-Bryant-Owens-Simpson debacle for example), displaying loyalty over professional judgment (keeping buddy Bratkowski too long) and a lack of recognition that he doesn’t have a winning model (although the most consistently winning family-run franchise in all of sports is in his division), has proven that Mike Brown does not have the wherewithal to change the Bengals’ makeup. I don’t know Mike Brown but I see better than I hear and I don’t see a plan to win, only to make money. The great fans of Cincinnati will always bleed orange and black and until Mike Brown stops bleeding green, we will only consistently see red.

Steve, your first problem is to think that MBMBB does what he does to win an NFL football game. You think it is about a game. MBMBB knows that without the right financials to begin with (especially with a small-market franchise), there is no football. If a team is sinkin' and stinkin' in the bowels of loss instead of profit, you aren't going to have to worry about whether the team wins or loses -- there isn't going to be any football to begin with. Get it?

Once again, it is ALL about solvency. Solvency first, winning -- last! Stop looking through glasses with opposite lense -- PLEASE! In doing so you lose focus on what the actual problems are. And, I hate to tell you thins but the fact is, you really can't win without a financially troubled team -- ask Laurie, Debartolo etc. MBMBB doesn't want to leave town so that means that he has to be financially responsible. To do that and still win means that one has 'lucked out' on certain players etc. He's hoping for 'luck' on the gridiron side -- but he knows that doing so on the financial side is a recipe for disaster -- again the addage, one has to be finanaically sound to campaign on other front. If one is not financially sound, it won't matter a bit, the campaigns on other front will falter.

Aside from New York teams, Chicago, Dallas... a team can't rely on having a winning record forever because the financials will catch up with them and they won't be able to pay nor will time work well for them -- players get old etc. Cincinnati can't keep itself solvent just on reputation -- it has to win. If it can't, then careful financial planning is the only thing to fall back on -- and that IS what MBMBB has fallen back on.

I don't see a plan to win a football league (the difference between you and me, btw) but what I do see is not a plan to make profit (again a mistake by you) but rather a plan to remain solvent. Like it or not, that's the plan and the sooner as you start to understand that it is NOT about winning but capability of 'fighting' when called for (and to do that you have to have a team and to do that, means you have to have fiscal responsibility etc.) -- you will then know why he does what he does and will understand that winning is just a case of blind luck. So quit Steve-0 trying to look at this through a winning on the gridiron aspect as that is NOT how MBMBB thinks -- he is the owner, you aren't, he can do what he wants as he sees fit, you don't have the 'pull' to do anything or require anything of him etc. (and you can't make him do it, nor the NFL to make him to do it, nor the Congress to make the NFL to make him do it -- essentially, what your scale for success is, is not what MBMBB's is).

Toolbag #4

John and Rebecca (100 level): I guess the sad part for me and my sister is the returning feelings of apathy that we were so familiar with during the 1990′s. These feelings were seemingly lifted when Lewis was hired in 2003 and with the AFC North title in 2005. However, the returning apathy seems to be more permanent. We have seen how Mike Brown handles success. Before we had a semblance of hope that if he ever achieved a level of winning he MAY be able to sustain it. Not so. Rock bottom seems eminent. This is our reality. A team that will, at best, have occasional streaks of winning and hover around mediocrity. This is our reality. We love and support a team that is owned by a family that will never fully realize or appreciate the value of it’s fans support.

Maybe there is apathy for the actual field of play (of course it is) but again, the scale with which MBMBB uses is not anything to do with the field -- if successful on the field that's a bonus, but if not -- that's not what he needs or is looking for!

No one yet has even come close to looking at this situation as it truly is. Everyone is naming various reasons for various things and assigning blame thusly -- again, it is divide and concquer. To do the concquering part, one must know what they are fighting -- people don't even understand that. The problem is, I will now tell you, is if you find out what your battling against, it is going to be a case of 'Be careful what you wish for -- you may get it!' If you could unstick MBMBB right now and put in an owner dedicated to winning, you'd find out that we could have a winning team -- for maybe 15 or twenty years -- then the back-pay -- the deferred salaries etc., would come back and haunt you and you'd be like the current San Francisco 49ers. They still haven't got back to an even level since the days of Joe and Dwight! And instead of staying in the city to deal with their problems, I would say that there is an even chance that you would see the team go elsewhere -- and then what would you have?

Toolbag #5

Tom (200 level): I had a revelation a few days back. Paying for my season tickets, food, and beverages at the stadium is like paying for someone to punch me in the stomach every Sunday. Who in their right mind would pay for something like that. We had a good time, but just like the addicts on Intervention I need to go to rehab. Cincinnati Bengals rehab…wish me luck, I sure hope I don’t relapse.

Right off from the start I have to ask: What is the definition of insanity? As frequently defined, the definition is a case where someone repeats and repeats and repeats something and expecting a change in the results.

Tool bag#6

Dick and Carol (200 level): We have finally made the decision that we should have made at least five years ago. The number rule in any business is to satisfy your customers. The uncaring and arrogant attitude of the Bengal Ownership continually keeps showing that they simply do not care about their customers,the fans such as my wife and myself. Like many others,I suppose that we have been waiting and hoping to see a sign of change. We do know of one change. We will not be spending any more money to support those who care so little about their fans and what should be their obligations to the City and County which have supported this Team.

Why did it take you that long? What in God's NAME made you think it was going to get better -- materially better -- not coincidentally better?

The Bengals ownership is ONLY arrogant when you look at things with an angle of winning on the football field. When you look at it with guide of: being able to exist to begin with -- which means it is fiscally stable, then things are different. But you are arrogant in thinking that the Bengals have to be what YOU want them to be. So who's really being arrogant?

I hate to spring this on you but the number one rule in business is to do what must be done to HAVE a business to begin with.

I have a computer shop, I like to have my patrons happy, but if they want me to put in a 250 watt power supply when they are going to use 500 watts, no, I am going tell them NO! If they get pissed off about it, no problem -- the answer is still NO! By God I am NOT going to have them go home (just in order to satisfy them) plug in their computer, have a fire, then come back and sue me successfully and then I go out of business. What good is that going to bring me? At some point I have to look out for myself.

This is the thought process that MBMBB is using. Like me, I want (and he wants) my patrons (his patrons) to be happy but I am not going to do something irresponsible that might come back to haunt me just to satisfy a person or persons. The scale of which I have to determine myself. Is what I do going to affect just one person or will it affrect ALL my customers?

You're idea of linking what matters and their care to that of winning a football game is NOTHING. From a fan's persective, you may be right -- but then, look at the root of 'fan' -- fanatic -- in and of itself it denotes a person who doesn't reason about a situation. Start thinking like MBMBB and you might start to get an insight as to what he does and the way he thinks.

In the end, you all think it is about winning football games -- the owner KNOWS it is all about staying solvent. Your disdain for his actions are not going to net you a winning football team nor is it going to change his ideas nor is it going to make him insolvent.

So how are you going to get MBMBB and his business principles out of the way? You can't complain to anyone -- well you can, but for various reasons, they are not going to give a red-shit about you and/or your complaint. You can't freeze MBMBB out by cutting his money intake (he will make 1 cent of profit EVERY YEAR if even NO ONE showed up for a game). You can't make him feel guilty -- it's his team and ass on the line so he doesn't give a rip about what you think. So how do you get him out? You do it through a lease (or rather -- not giving him a lease -- OOPPSSSSSS! You gave him a lease). Sorry, you're fucked! You could have done something about it fifteen years ago and you didn't. You were too arrogant and selfish -- your fucking problem, Mac. Quit bitchin' about it. Just don't make that same mistake again when a lease or building comes up as an issue.

Another by-product of STFU? You don't have to listen to mouthpiece idiots (Dougherty etc.) bring up the same shit over and over again. Maybe they will leave as well.

We must remember, however, we need to have an indoor practice facility like you wouldn't believe!

Douchebag above,

The simple fact you had to write multiple paragraphs to slander the non-renewers says that Mike Brown and his style of management is extremely hard to defend.

I've got a response for you. Mike Brown's record as a GM is 115-206-1. He is the fastest GM to reach 200 losses in the history of the NFL. There are prideful, sometimes too much, people and fans in this city who give a shit.

You're probably just a douchebag lawyer. Commence with your 6 paragraph response.

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    Bengals Futility - By The Numbers

    • 20 - Years since the Bengals have won a playoff game

      0 - Total number of playoff wins in Mike Brown's tenure as owner

      .359 - Bengals regular season winning percentage since Mike Brown took over as owner (115-206-1 in 20 seasons)

      29-34-1 - Record since 2005 playoff game vs Steelers

      6 - Seasons the Bengals have lost their first six games since 1991. No other team has more than two.

      0 - Teams North of Cincinnati without an indoor practice facility

      10 - Players arrested in a 14 month span from 2005-2006

      32 - Mike Brown's ranking, out of 32, of the "Best Owners in the NFL" by Michael Silver of Sports Illustrated in 2007

      458,000,000 - Amount, in dollars, that Hamilton County Taxpayers paid to build PBS

      2032 - Year that Hamilton County will have finally paid off its debt on the stadium deal

      3 - Total number of non-clerical employees employed in the Bengals scouting department, lowest in the league

      747,000,000 - Amount, in dollars, paid in free agency by the Bengals from 1994 - 2005, second worst of all 28 teams in existence for the duration, behind only Arizona

      118 – Ranking, out of 118 professional teams, of the “Worst Franchises” in professional sports, as ranked by ESPN the Magazine in 2003.

      97 – Ranking, out of 98 general managers in all four major sports with three or more years of experience, of Mike Brown’s performance as a GM, as ranked by Forbes in 2007.

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