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Who Dey Revolution Manifesto

  • Preamble

    IN THIS TIME of perpetual Cincinnati Bengals incompetence and futility, with zero playoff wins in the nineteen seasons since the WhoDeyRevolution Godfather, Paul Brown, passed away in 1991 and handed the team to his fortunate son, the Despot, Mike Brown;


    WE, the members of the Who Dey Revolution, in our fervent dedication to the Cincinnati Bengals and fanatical desire to transform our hometown team into perpetual Super Bowl contenders, call for a popular revolution of fans to demand comprehensive reform to the managerial decisions and approach of Cincinnati Bengals ownership, management, staff and players, and hereby call for the adoption of the following Who Dey Revolution Manifesto:

    Manifesto Demands

    THAT the Mike Brown, Katie Blackburn, Marvin Lewis, along with every other member of the Bengals management, staff and personnel, state publicly to all Bengals fans, “I will do everything in my power to help the Cincinnati Bengals win a Super Bowl;”

    THAT Mike Brown will hire a general manager, drastically expand the scouting department and relinquish all control of player personnel;

    THAT all training, rehabilitation and medical facilities are considered best-in-class compared to other NFL teams;

    THAT the management fill the team only with players who fit the system, both mentally and physically, and are not reluctant to makes changes to player personnel when needed, regardless of cost or loyalty concerns;

    THAT offensive and defensive line depth is considered the top priority for all player personnel decisions;

    THAT all decisions made by ownership, management, staff and players, both on and off the field, are judged only by this criterion: “Does this help the Cincinnati Bengals win a Super Bowl?”

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« Rob Ryan is Also Not Impressed With Nate Livings | Main | Melodramatic Post Title Winner: "Two Seasons Ended in Cincinnati Yesterday" »

October 10, 2010


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Hey. There is nothing wrong with the Ruffed Grouse


Shouldn't this have something to do with Tampa?

Incidentally, if you look at where Interstates 79 and 80 intersect, that's about 4 miles from my house. This map isn't drawn to scale, but that should give you a rough idea of how entrenched rampant Steelerism is around where I grew up.

Also, at least in Pennsylvania, if someone's in the left lane on the interstate, they're making an effort to pass someone, unlike the stretch of I-71 in Ohio from Akron (well, Lodi) to Columbus (and most of the way from Columbus to Cincy) where the person in the right lane is going 55 and the person in the left lane is going 56 (and the speed limit is 65).

Wyatt, I was thinking the same thing...evidently, win or lose, Tampa Bay is not worth addressing...I only hope that's a good thing...although I do like that map.

In the spirit of contribution, I will help with Tampa Bay:

They are a chick team, and, here's my proof:

Buccaneers are pirates.

Pirates are the subject of the movie franchise, "Pirates of the Caribbean"

Johnny Depp, an actor, plays a role of a pirate in said franchise movies.

(also, the Buccaneers are also a franchise named after pirates)

Chicks love Johnny Depp.

Therefore, based on the proofs and (sub-proof) postulated,

The Buccaneeers are not only a chick team, but also a chick franchise...

They might as well be called
the Tampa Bay "Hello Kitty"s

OchoC has probably had many of them as contestants on his TV show

Actually, never mind the previous explanation,

They are actually named after a group of roadside merchants of gourmet fresh produce (corn in particular), rejected as vendors by the Whole Foods corporation, for their unreasonable pricing...

But don't let their name fool you; the main point is, who wants to buy corn from Tampa Bay, or from Tampa Bay merchants?

Maybe OchoC since he is from neer the area? you see, their origins are much less interesting than their 'updated' uniforms and stuff

They don't even have the balls to put a real "Jolly Roger" on their helmets...what the hell is that?
An actual "Jolly Roger" symbol must not be PC somehow, or something...

Typically shitty start by the offense. Like pulling teeth. Painful.

both teams are looking notably crappy out there right now...must be the weather, although I would think Tampa Bay would be used to it...therefore they have no excuse, must be a typical day for them

[ @ Bengals possession, 5:11 1st quarter: ]

C'mon Bengals, get snappin' (or is that crackin' ? )

@ 4:07, 1st

T.O. !!!!!!

Save that one for the road to the FOH !!!!
That one *really* counts!!!!

FOH = Fall Of Hame

: )

Third shift breakfast = donuts & beer
Third shift dinner = beer & donuts

Another crappy third down situation, 3rd and 5,
@ under the 11:00 mark, third qtr:

it's called 'boring'.

The Bengals are fucking god awful. Fuck the Bengals, fuck the Reds. Fuck Cincinnati Sports I'm done.

Evidently all the Phillies had to do, was practice batting against a pitching machine @ 105 mph...

Does Chapman even have a changeup?

This one's on our quarterback. And Lewis. Time to change up guys - get outta here!!!

Why are we throwing the ball long, with under 2:00, with the lead? Shouldn't we have held onto the ball, and ran out the clock?

Classic Bungles

Since NOTHING is 'on topic' regarding this board, this might be as good of a post as any to write the following...

I must apologize to Bienemy (I think it was him that was so insistent that the Bengals get an indoor facility...) in that they need such a facility and they must do two othjer things -- play their regular season games there (ALL of them) as well as no one is allowed to see them either in person or on T.V. That way the shit that we all saw today -- never gets seen by another living soul! hahahahaha!

Good points? Billick was yappin' about rumblings against Palmer -- AND -- Bratkowski! At least he got one of them right (again, I point to Kenny Anderson circa 1978-79).

Oh well, the season is over folks and they are showing their true stripes. How's about this board and its participants start to become anything other than 'feel-good' ne'er do wells who are nothing but bandwagon riders'.

Reality bites - then SUCKS! bwahaha!

straight from the bourgeois site ( ) :


Bucs stun Bengals, 241-21
Posted 5 hours ago

* "Headlines" should be changed to "business as usual"

* 241-21? Might as well be

* posted 5 hours ago? At 12:00 noon today?
How is that possible?
Simple...the game is rigged, as it has been for a
while, by the Bengals' front office.

At least in Pennsylvania they have owners who care about winning. Unlike that scumbag Mike Brown. If the Russians should be aiming anywhere it's right at Mike Brown's big fat greedy head.

can we get project mayhem back up and running with a creative "fire brat" campaign!?!?!

Project Mayhem needs to target the root cause, not just Brat.

Have to get people to burn their season tickets and deprive the evil Brown family of cash.

Fire Marvin.
This sucks.
The only thing that could possibly make this worse is the Reds getting swept.
I'm calling the Bengals going 4-12. I'll take them beating Cleveland and Buffalo and losing to everyone else.

supposedly there are 115,000 people downtown today to see the Bengals vs Bucs and Reds vs Phillies. Im putting the over/under for "how many children see a grown man cry for the first time" at 25,000. Failure!!! Nobody does it quite like Cincinnati!!!

Seriously are there other sports towns that are bigger jokes than Cincinnati? Reds + Bengals no playoff wins in 15 + 20 years. Hard to think of another city that's done as bad.

F This...

I hit my breaking point today....

I AM done

No finger pointing..... it's everything!!!!!! This was the biggest meltdown I have ever seen today......

I am done.... ashamed to be a fan

Brat.... M Brown..... Marvin... Carson..... it does not matter...... I blame everyone.... this was horrible.... won't waste my time picking apart game.....

horrible.... we are the bottom 3 of NFL easily

I'm done

I have studied and spoken with a few sovereigns all of them are not in it for the anti-government stance, some just basically know how our government REALLY operates.It was very informing and educational.I think each of us could benefit from listening to sovereigns who are not ant-gov we do it when we talk to judges and lawyers,so dont be 1 sided to any issue seek knowledge.

Thank you for posting the great content.I was looking for something like this.I found it quiet interesting, hopefully you will keep posting such blogs..Keep sharing

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    Bengals Futility - By The Numbers

    • 20 - Years since the Bengals have won a playoff game

      0 - Total number of playoff wins in Mike Brown's tenure as owner

      .359 - Bengals regular season winning percentage since Mike Brown took over as owner (115-206-1 in 20 seasons)

      29-34-1 - Record since 2005 playoff game vs Steelers

      6 - Seasons the Bengals have lost their first six games since 1991. No other team has more than two.

      0 - Teams North of Cincinnati without an indoor practice facility

      10 - Players arrested in a 14 month span from 2005-2006

      32 - Mike Brown's ranking, out of 32, of the "Best Owners in the NFL" by Michael Silver of Sports Illustrated in 2007

      458,000,000 - Amount, in dollars, that Hamilton County Taxpayers paid to build PBS

      2032 - Year that Hamilton County will have finally paid off its debt on the stadium deal

      3 - Total number of non-clerical employees employed in the Bengals scouting department, lowest in the league

      747,000,000 - Amount, in dollars, paid in free agency by the Bengals from 1994 - 2005, second worst of all 28 teams in existence for the duration, behind only Arizona

      118 – Ranking, out of 118 professional teams, of the “Worst Franchises” in professional sports, as ranked by ESPN the Magazine in 2003.

      97 – Ranking, out of 98 general managers in all four major sports with three or more years of experience, of Mike Brown’s performance as a GM, as ranked by Forbes in 2007.

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