Embrace the Circus

(I stopped writing on this blog sometime during the 2008 season as I needed a break from my abusive relationship as a lifelong Bengals fan. Most of my previous writing was about Jeff Query, Tremain Mack, and others from the loveable cast of losers the Bengals assembled during the 1990s.) 

As a Bengal fan I have always wanted to go into a season that was filled with so many amazing possibilities for entertainment value. At this point, as we near the end of the endless desert without football, all I can think of is Maximus screaming, “Are you not entertained? Is this not why you are here?” And yes this is why I am finally here.  I can think of a couple different ways this can play out....

The dream scenario is the Bengals stomp everyone on their way to winning the Superbowl; Rachel Nichol camps out at PBS every week (which means Rachel is staying and going out at night in Cinci which is another win); Mike Brown makes so much money he pays for a bubble instead of bussing the team to Mason; there is no 2011 season so the Bengals get to be the defending champs for two straight years as we all know the Bengals winning the Superbowl is never happening again in any of our lifetimes unless Cincinnati becomes this decades Boston.

Behind door number two is: the offense looks old; the first place schedule is way too tough; there are a couple of typical heartbreaking, how-did-they-Bungle-that-game losses; and they end up 7-9 just like every other promising year for the Bengals in the last twenty years (but at least we’ll always have Shake N’ Blake).

The third option is that the supreme confidence turns into total implosion.  This is the nightmare scenario I have always dreamed about and that any lover of black humor can get excited for.  This team has such high potential that if they went a not unimaginable 3-13 it would have to be the greatest 3-13 season ever; I’m invisioning TO and Ocho throwing down like Pinella and Dibble; Tank getting arrested, Pacman fleeing the police in a high speed chase then getting arrested and then getting waived; Ced visiting Texas; Marvin finally letting it all get to him and going Jim Mora type postal; J.T. O’Sullivan getting significant playing time; Mike Brown bankrupting Cincinnati; and Ed Werder camping out giving us all the grim details daily from PBS.

With all this in front of us fans I sure hope we don’t get stuck with a 7-9 season when this could be the year we finally win it all or have the best 3-13 season ever. Knowing how I’ve been treated the last twenty years as a fan I am glad that at least this year they are trying to entertain me.

Comments

[wch]

IOW... Same fucking Bengals?

[Sean]

I've been saying the same thing...win or lose, it'll be entertaining

[BMN]

This post sums up EXACTLY how I feel about the current season. I mean EXACTLY. It's like someone read my brain and posted it rather than me posting it.

Like it or not, football is entertainment, its implications are largely imagined (e.g. if the Yankees win the World Series tomorrow, does it mean that each individual New Yorker *won* something? Not exactly). We typically cheer and boo because, like any form of entertainment, we attach ourselves to a cast of characters and become so emotionally entangled that our moods actually become affected by the result.

Which is a psychoblab way of saying "winning or losing matters because we believe it does, but at the end of the day, football is entertainment."

The "3-13 with all the crazy $#!+ posted above" scenario would be INSANELY entertaining and sure would beat a mundane 8-8 season where nothing is won and no one is entertained. Don't get me wrong, I'd rather then Bengals win the Super Bowl (that would be SUPREMELY enteraining) but if that can't happen, then go the other way, not the "mediocre and boring" route.

[BMN]

Addendum: "Embrace the Circus" is a great slogan. I'm contemplating having a shirt made and wearing it to the CIN-ATL game...

[sexonthebreech]

"First place" schedule is the dumbest crock of shit. Only affects 2 games!!! 4 vs nfc divison, 4 vs afc division, 6 vs our own division, 2 against remaining 2 afc divisions that finished same place as you. On the plus side this is one of the easiest ways to separate out idiots who get force fed sports opinions by espn and regurgitate.