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Who Dey Revolution Manifesto

  • Preamble

    IN THIS TIME of perpetual Cincinnati Bengals incompetence and futility, with zero playoff wins in the nineteen seasons since the WhoDeyRevolution Godfather, Paul Brown, passed away in 1991 and handed the team to his fortunate son, the Despot, Mike Brown;

    Introduction

    WE, the members of the Who Dey Revolution, in our fervent dedication to the Cincinnati Bengals and fanatical desire to transform our hometown team into perpetual Super Bowl contenders, call for a popular revolution of fans to demand comprehensive reform to the managerial decisions and approach of Cincinnati Bengals ownership, management, staff and players, and hereby call for the adoption of the following Who Dey Revolution Manifesto:

    Manifesto Demands

    THAT the Mike Brown, Katie Blackburn, Marvin Lewis, along with every other member of the Bengals management, staff and personnel, state publicly to all Bengals fans, “I will do everything in my power to help the Cincinnati Bengals win a Super Bowl;”

    THAT Mike Brown will hire a general manager, drastically expand the scouting department and relinquish all control of player personnel;

    THAT all training, rehabilitation and medical facilities are considered best-in-class compared to other NFL teams;

    THAT the management fill the team only with players who fit the system, both mentally and physically, and are not reluctant to makes changes to player personnel when needed, regardless of cost or loyalty concerns;

    THAT offensive and defensive line depth is considered the top priority for all player personnel decisions;

    THAT all decisions made by ownership, management, staff and players, both on and off the field, are judged only by this criterion: “Does this help the Cincinnati Bengals win a Super Bowl?”

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August 20, 2010

Claws That Will Rip Your Face Off

Tiger Eagle
An Eagle and a Bengal walk into a bar. The bartender says to them, "No shirt, no shoes, no service."  So they walk out. 

Posted by on August 20, 2010 at 03:45 PM in i'm an asshole, you see |

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Did you get that picture off of a Chinese restaurant's wall? It's so Asian-looking, it's unbelievable.

Posted by: TheCarlPickensClause | August 20, 2010 at 04:36 PM

Yes - it's from Sammy's Noodle Shop. East 10th st and 6th Avenue in NYC. Delicious.

Posted by: Sleeping With Bieniemy | August 20, 2010 at 04:40 PM

Haha! I KNEW IT! Pretty sick picture though.

Posted by: TheCarlPickensClause | August 20, 2010 at 06:30 PM

Is that Brian Leonard?

Posted by: Artrell | August 20, 2010 at 07:19 PM

Watched the game this morning on my dvr, & they looked pretty damn good. The Def played like a #1 D & the offense looked pretty sharp against the tough Eagles defense. Definately looking forward to week 1 that should be a good game.

Posted by: blester01 | August 21, 2010 at 11:29 AM

Have to say Andre Smith is looking more and more like a massive mistake though. He was awful.

Posted by: DorsetBengal07 | August 22, 2010 at 10:31 AM

SWB: I'm moving to lower Manhattan next week. Where do you recommend watching games on Sunday?

Posted by: BED | August 23, 2010 at 02:18 PM

BED - Phebe's. E. 4th and Bowery.

Posted by: Sly Vramavomovich | August 23, 2010 at 07:38 PM

Thanks Sly!

Posted by: BED | August 24, 2010 at 08:39 AM

Have to say Andre Smith is looking more and more like a massive mistake though. He was awful.

Posted by: Wholesale Piumini Moncler donna | September 25, 2011 at 03:08 AM

Yassy, I totally understand your worries. I bet most people can. But I have to say you are the best orderer I know! I always know I'm in for a good meal when I let you do the choosing. Really truly. xo

Posted by: True Religion Jeans | October 10, 2011 at 02:26 AM

I think Cincinnati's sucess depends on the leadership of the QB. Cincinnati can have all the talent in the world, but if Carson can not get the guys to come together as a team as Chad would say "Kiss the baby". Look at the Colts. Payton is a leader. The Colts do not have the best individual players but it is the leadership of Payton that makes the team come together and win. It is up to the offense to stay on the field and score, giving our defense time to rest. I totally agree with what was said that the Bengals have to many mental errors. They need to work on the OL not jumping to soon. I saw that all year long last year.

Posted by: Justin Bieber Supra | October 12, 2011 at 08:52 PM

The comments to this entry are closed.

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    Bengals Futility - By The Numbers

    • 20 - Years since the Bengals have won a playoff game

      0 - Total number of playoff wins in Mike Brown's tenure as owner

      .359 - Bengals regular season winning percentage since Mike Brown took over as owner (115-206-1 in 20 seasons)

      29-34-1 - Record since 2005 playoff game vs Steelers

      6 - Seasons the Bengals have lost their first six games since 1991. No other team has more than two.

      0 - Teams North of Cincinnati without an indoor practice facility

      10 - Players arrested in a 14 month span from 2005-2006

      32 - Mike Brown's ranking, out of 32, of the "Best Owners in the NFL" by Michael Silver of Sports Illustrated in 2007

      458,000,000 - Amount, in dollars, that Hamilton County Taxpayers paid to build PBS

      2032 - Year that Hamilton County will have finally paid off its debt on the stadium deal

      3 - Total number of non-clerical employees employed in the Bengals scouting department, lowest in the league

      747,000,000 - Amount, in dollars, paid in free agency by the Bengals from 1994 - 2005, second worst of all 28 teams in existence for the duration, behind only Arizona

      118 – Ranking, out of 118 professional teams, of the “Worst Franchises” in professional sports, as ranked by ESPN the Magazine in 2003.

      97 – Ranking, out of 98 general managers in all four major sports with three or more years of experience, of Mike Brown’s performance as a GM, as ranked by Forbes in 2007.

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