IN THIS TIME of perpetual Cincinnati Bengals incompetence and futility, with zero playoff wins in the nineteen seasons since the WhoDeyRevolution Godfather, Paul Brown, passed away in 1991 and handed the team to his fortunate son, the Despot, Mike Brown;
Introduction
WE, the members of the Who Dey Revolution, in our fervent dedication to the Cincinnati Bengals and fanatical desire to transform our hometown team into perpetual Super Bowl contenders, call for a popular revolution of fans to demand comprehensive reform to the managerial decisions and approach of Cincinnati Bengals ownership, management, staff and players, and hereby call for the adoption of the following Who Dey Revolution Manifesto:
Manifesto Demands
THAT the Mike Brown, Katie Blackburn, Marvin Lewis, along with every other member of the Bengals management, staff and personnel, state publicly to all Bengals fans, “I will do everything in my power to help the Cincinnati Bengals win a Super Bowl;”
THAT Mike Brown will hire a general manager, drastically expand the scouting department and relinquish all control of player personnel;
THAT all training, rehabilitation and medical facilities are considered best-in-class compared to other NFL teams;
THAT the management fill the team only with players who fit the system, both mentally and physically, and are not reluctant to makes changes to player personnel when needed, regardless of cost or loyalty concerns;
THAT offensive and defensive line depth is considered the top priority for all player personnel decisions;
THAT all decisions made by ownership, management, staff and players, both on and off the field, are judged only by this criterion: “Does this help the Cincinnati Bengals win a Super Bowl?”
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20 - Years since the Bengals have won a playoff game
0 - Total number of playoff wins in Mike Brown's tenure as owner
.359 - Bengals regular season winning percentage since Mike Brown took over as owner (115-206-1 in 20 seasons)
29-34-1 - Record since 2005 playoff game vs Steelers
6 - Seasons the Bengals have lost their first six games since 1991. No other team has more than two.
0 - Teams North of Cincinnati without an indoor practice facility
10 - Players arrested in a 14 month span from 2005-2006
32 - Mike Brown's ranking, out of 32, of the "Best Owners in the NFL" by Michael Silver of Sports Illustrated in 2007
458,000,000 - Amount, in dollars, that Hamilton County Taxpayers paid to build PBS
2032 - Year that Hamilton County will have finally paid off its debt on the stadium deal
3 - Total number of non-clerical employees employed in the Bengals scouting department, lowest in the league
747,000,000 - Amount, in dollars, paid in free agency by the Bengals from 1994 - 2005, second worst of all 28 teams in existence for the duration, behind only Arizona
118 – Ranking, out of 118 professional teams, of the “Worst Franchises” in professional sports, as ranked by ESPN the Magazine in 2003.
97 – Ranking, out of 98 general managers in all four major sports with three or more years of experience, of Mike Brown’s performance as a GM, as ranked by Forbes in 2007.
Good shout. That was the thing that jumped out to me too actually. Looking forward to next week when we see L Coles strap himself into his oxygen tent for bedtime. It really helped him last time.
Posted by: DorsetBengal07 | August 20, 2010 at 06:10 AM
I would be pissed if I was fired that way. That is like not having your boss do it, but the head of human resources instead. I would at least want to talk with the coach. I guess Ryan is too busy shooting his mouth off.
I haven't seen the Bengals Hardknocks yet so I have nothing to compare it to. I am waiting for it to come up on Hulu.
Posted by: blesterov | August 20, 2010 at 06:14 AM
@Blesterov - they actually pull these guys in and have a sit down meeting with them when they let them go. In the Bengals Hard Knocks, Jim Lippincott just grabs you while you're talking to your buddies and tells you that you're being cut. Or, he wakes your ass up at like 5 am while you're sleeping and tells you your cut. It's a sick joke.
The Jets pull you into a private meeting and explain to you why you are being let go. Much better. In general, I guess head coaches don't do the firing. I mean, the GM was in that meeting. He' the Head Coaches boss.
I didn't show it because I couldn't edit this particular video to do it, but Rex Ryan finds these guys and wishes them best after the meeting. So he doesn't ignore the cutting process even if he isn't in the formal meeting.
Posted by: Sleeping With Bieniemy | August 20, 2010 at 10:33 AM
That stood out to me when I saw the Jets hard knocks. Jim Lippincot is like the little fat annoying Kid in school who just needs his ass kicked. Lippincot was all nervous stopping guys in the hallway and asking for their playbooks immediately. Players are going to look at the Jets and want to play there based on what they see on hard knocks. Players are going to look at the Bengals and see that what they have heard about the team is true. Doesn't really matter because unless you are hurt, a felon, or a malcontent who will play for below average pay, the Bengals wouldn't sign you anyway.
It was close to the biggest example of what a mom and pp organization is. The other one on the Bengals hard knocks is MFB telling coaches to convert d-linemen to tight end and then D-Tackles to guards. That's shit that you do in High school. Not the NFL.
The other thing is the facilities. I remember the "top-notch" training camp facility that the Ravens had and even the Jets facility made Georgetown Kentucky look like............. well, Georgetown Kentucky.
The Bengals in hard knocks just screamed low ball Mom and Pop organization, and the other teams on hard knocks look like they play football for a living.
Posted by: JM | August 20, 2010 at 11:43 AM
Oh snap. That is really shitty. I can't wait to watch last season's show. I thought your headline was just a joke, but damn that is really unprofessional. I wonder how they let go Ginger.
Marvin should be sitting down with the guys to let them go, just like we had to do with our personnel when the economy took a big dump on everyone.
Posted by: blesterov | August 20, 2010 at 12:05 PM
Speaking of facilities, I wonder if the Bengals are interested in bringing their camp up to the University of Dayton. It will be interesting to see the turnout they get there on Sunday, or if they are just using that to put some leverage on Gtown in their negotiations to stay.
Posted by: blesterov | August 20, 2010 at 12:09 PM
I hope Jim Lippincott gave the ginger a cincinnati bow tie in his sleep and told him about being cut when he awoke to the biggets turds he's ever seen in his life laying on his chest. Biggest choke artist in pro sports. I hate Jim Lippincott too, I hope Andre smith give him a cleveland steamer, he deserves it.
Posted by: CurseofBoJackson | August 20, 2010 at 03:37 PM
"Next week on Hard Knocks...the team's veterans, as well as this year's hopefuls, all line up for the obligatory back shaving...but one rookie in particular isn't having it..."
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