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Who Dey Revolution Manifesto

  • Preamble

    IN THIS TIME of perpetual Cincinnati Bengals incompetence and futility, with zero playoff wins in the nineteen seasons since the WhoDeyRevolution Godfather, Paul Brown, passed away in 1991 and handed the team to his fortunate son, the Despot, Mike Brown;


    WE, the members of the Who Dey Revolution, in our fervent dedication to the Cincinnati Bengals and fanatical desire to transform our hometown team into perpetual Super Bowl contenders, call for a popular revolution of fans to demand comprehensive reform to the managerial decisions and approach of Cincinnati Bengals ownership, management, staff and players, and hereby call for the adoption of the following Who Dey Revolution Manifesto:

    Manifesto Demands

    THAT the Mike Brown, Katie Blackburn, Marvin Lewis, along with every other member of the Bengals management, staff and personnel, state publicly to all Bengals fans, “I will do everything in my power to help the Cincinnati Bengals win a Super Bowl;”

    THAT Mike Brown will hire a general manager, drastically expand the scouting department and relinquish all control of player personnel;

    THAT all training, rehabilitation and medical facilities are considered best-in-class compared to other NFL teams;

    THAT the management fill the team only with players who fit the system, both mentally and physically, and are not reluctant to makes changes to player personnel when needed, regardless of cost or loyalty concerns;

    THAT offensive and defensive line depth is considered the top priority for all player personnel decisions;

    THAT all decisions made by ownership, management, staff and players, both on and off the field, are judged only by this criterion: “Does this help the Cincinnati Bengals win a Super Bowl?”

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April 12, 2010


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I'm soooo happy with this move. The Steelers are going to suck this year!

Yes. Yes, they are.

I guess you're right Bungle fans; the Steelers should just keep cutting and resigning their delinquent players until they kill themselves falling off the back of a truck. That's how the smart teams operate.

Actually, it's Mike Wallace's time to shine. It's Limas Sweed's time to suck, but then that's all the time. Luckily he won't be above 4th on WR depth chart even with Santonio gone.

troll alert!

Ape - You're living in denial. Limas Sweed is going to be dropping passes all over people's faces next year.

Better to live in denial about Limas Sweed working out than the denial that Carson Palmer isn't a shitty washed-up quarterback. Also: partaking in Matt Jones' crack might actually make Ocho MORE sane.

Ocho has been tripping for like 6 years on the same PCP that fucked Chris Tucker up in Friday.

As for Palmer. When Bengals fans think of shitty washed up QB's, we think of Scott Mitchell. Palmer, as off as has looked at times, is no Scott Mitchell. It's a sliding scale.

Hey there Ape, what are you doin' here bud? Shouldn't you hurry up and get back to riding on Drew's coattails?

I like it when Ape comes on here. It means we're doing something right. And as much as I hate the Steelers and therefore Ape along with them, he is KSK.

I do enjoy the KSK, just not Ape.

Not his fault, I guess. Living in Pittsburgh, the whole 'obnoxious Steelers uber-homer' bit is a little played out for me.

Hey Striped_sox, i just moved to Pittsburgh, do you know of any bars that play Bengals' games? or any bars that just play a ton of games at once? im kinda freaking out here...

Hey Ryag, there's actually a lot of places that I could recommend -- just depends on where you live in the city.

As long as there isn't a Steelers game on at the same time, there's a bunch of good places to go. For Shadyside, I'd recommend Buffalo Blues and the Rock Bottom at The Waterfront (close to Squirrel Hill). I haven't found a good place north of the city, but I imagine that I will soon as I'll be living there.

However if there is a Steelers game on at the same time, in my experience the Smokey Bones in Robinson is one of the better places to go. Not _too_ many annoying Steelers fans and I see the odd person in a Palmer or Johnson jersey every now and then. Robinson is suburb south of the city and its nestled in a huge commercial / shopping area.

Striped_sox - thanks a lot man! I know where Robinson Twp is... Im living in Mount Washington at the moment but ill be living in Lawrenceville soon, so Shadyside is pretty close. Hell, I'll drive to the burbs to see a game as long as I won't want to puke in my own mouth looking at all the Stillers fans barking at each other. sixburgh... bleh...

I have pretty much felt the same way. GO BUCKS!!!!

evrything is perfect!

Do not cash to buy a building? You not have to worry, just because it is achievable to receive the loan to work out such problems. Hence take a short term loan to buy all you require.

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    Bengals Futility - By The Numbers

    • 20 - Years since the Bengals have won a playoff game

      0 - Total number of playoff wins in Mike Brown's tenure as owner

      .359 - Bengals regular season winning percentage since Mike Brown took over as owner (115-206-1 in 20 seasons)

      29-34-1 - Record since 2005 playoff game vs Steelers

      6 - Seasons the Bengals have lost their first six games since 1991. No other team has more than two.

      0 - Teams North of Cincinnati without an indoor practice facility

      10 - Players arrested in a 14 month span from 2005-2006

      32 - Mike Brown's ranking, out of 32, of the "Best Owners in the NFL" by Michael Silver of Sports Illustrated in 2007

      458,000,000 - Amount, in dollars, that Hamilton County Taxpayers paid to build PBS

      2032 - Year that Hamilton County will have finally paid off its debt on the stadium deal

      3 - Total number of non-clerical employees employed in the Bengals scouting department, lowest in the league

      747,000,000 - Amount, in dollars, paid in free agency by the Bengals from 1994 - 2005, second worst of all 28 teams in existence for the duration, behind only Arizona

      118 – Ranking, out of 118 professional teams, of the “Worst Franchises” in professional sports, as ranked by ESPN the Magazine in 2003.

      97 – Ranking, out of 98 general managers in all four major sports with three or more years of experience, of Mike Brown’s performance as a GM, as ranked by Forbes in 2007.

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