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Who Dey Revolution Manifesto

  • Preamble

    IN THIS TIME of perpetual Cincinnati Bengals incompetence and futility, with zero playoff wins in the nineteen seasons since the WhoDeyRevolution Godfather, Paul Brown, passed away in 1991 and handed the team to his fortunate son, the Despot, Mike Brown;


    WE, the members of the Who Dey Revolution, in our fervent dedication to the Cincinnati Bengals and fanatical desire to transform our hometown team into perpetual Super Bowl contenders, call for a popular revolution of fans to demand comprehensive reform to the managerial decisions and approach of Cincinnati Bengals ownership, management, staff and players, and hereby call for the adoption of the following Who Dey Revolution Manifesto:

    Manifesto Demands

    THAT the Mike Brown, Katie Blackburn, Marvin Lewis, along with every other member of the Bengals management, staff and personnel, state publicly to all Bengals fans, “I will do everything in my power to help the Cincinnati Bengals win a Super Bowl;”

    THAT Mike Brown will hire a general manager, drastically expand the scouting department and relinquish all control of player personnel;

    THAT all training, rehabilitation and medical facilities are considered best-in-class compared to other NFL teams;

    THAT the management fill the team only with players who fit the system, both mentally and physically, and are not reluctant to makes changes to player personnel when needed, regardless of cost or loyalty concerns;

    THAT offensive and defensive line depth is considered the top priority for all player personnel decisions;

    THAT all decisions made by ownership, management, staff and players, both on and off the field, are judged only by this criterion: “Does this help the Cincinnati Bengals win a Super Bowl?”

Inaugural Post

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« Pick a Side | Main | End of Season Ramblings »

January 09, 2010


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Lets get it on!!!!
WHO DEY!!!!!

Down side - crappy Coles fumble.

Bright side - first offensive series complete - no injury to Carson.

Coles redeemed himself.

Continued observations:

-D. Peko, as I said before, needs to be re-signed, TOMORROW, to a long-term contract. He is, by far, the most important player on our line and within two years could very well be the best DT in the AFCN.

-If the "Sanchise" attempts five of those bubble screens, Leon Hall or J-Joe is taking one of them the other way. If Sanchise attempts 15 passes, someone in stripes is coming down with one of them. If Sanchise attempts 25+ passes, the Bengals will be playing next week.

Does anyone else think Lewis might of challenged those plays because mike brown is too fucking cheap to have a TV up in the booth? Ive been drinking so take this in stride.

Cut the Ginger Kid.

That is all.

Actually, that is not all. I want Esteban Ochocinco kicking for the remainder of the game.

Quan Cosby is the next TJ. Caldwell better turn into the next Chad or Henry, or he's going to be watching a lot.

Graham is shaving points or something. This is just ridiculous.

Graham is the definition of a grass fairy in pads...did anyone really think he would make a kick that mattered. I love Carson but he is no leader. Trade him to St. Louis or one of the early ones and pick one of the studs coming out this year (McCoy, Bradford, Locker). This team revealed why they do not have a pro bowl player. Losing at home in the first round, what a bust.

This season was a total fucking illusion wasn't it? Tell MB he can shove his fucking franchise kicker up his arse. Keep the faith in the revolution everyone. Viva la Revolution!! (London Division)

Really, did anyone truly expect anything different? There's a reason the Bengals are the Bengals. Hell, there are a thousand reasons.

Hey, Negative Nancies?

The Bengals played a good game, but it wasn't quite good enough. It's not the end of the world. I'm so disappointed I'm ignoring phone calls from my family because I don't want to talk to anybody but you guys are just sad. Yes, this season was the proverbial acorn found by the blind squirrel, but look on the bright side - the Bengals swept the Steelers, Ravens, and Browns. I'd honestly rather beat the Steelers and keep them out of the playoffs every year than win the Super Bowl. That could have something to do with me being from western PA though. Anyway, congratulations to the Men for a great season, and thanks for actually giving us a game this week.

Things we know:
1. Carson Palmer: Not a franchise QB. Sorry, but a 55 rating doesn't cut it for 100 million dollars.
2. Shank Graham: Not a franchise kicker. Hopefully those were his last two attempts in a Bengals uniform.
3. Coles? Not an adequate replacement for TJH. In fact, you designate TJH as the franchise player and pick up a kicker off the street, and maybe you win the Oakland game and this game too.
4. Bengals safeties? Suck at tackling. All of them.
5. Robert Geathers? Overpaid. Didn't do jack most of this year.
6. Ced Benson. There's your franchise player, right now.
7. Dan Coats? Why the hell is he playing NFL football? He should be working in a meat packing plant.
8. Ochocinco? Should change his name back to Johnson. Didn't do jack on Revis Island.
9. Offensive line? Not good when it counted.
10. Who Dey Revolution? Should not have taken this year off due to the fluky winning year. We'll be back to our same sucktastic channel next year, and hopefully then youse guys will organize some more protests/actions.

@Disgusted: You cannot trade Palmer because he has a huge contract that he hasn't lived up to. It's not like when they traded All Pro LB Bill Bergey for scads of draft picks (a mistake, that was).

So we're stuck with Palmer until the contract runs out. It would be nice if they drafted a development project... except the Bengals have not shown any ability to develop development projects. So we're stuck with Palmer.

Back to the protest line.

This team will never win as long as Mikey is running the show. Grahm is not going to walk into Mikey's office and quit because he sucks, Marvin is not going to resign because he sucks. Mikey Boy has to be a smart owner, an owner who wants to win. We know he is neither.

@PA: Which is why this season was a shame. The fluky winning shut down the protests. We needed to really boycott the heck out of the team so that they cannot make money so that Mikey Boy will sell.

The only thing worse than freezing my ass off in Florida is watching the Bengals get beat by the Jets while freezing my ass off in Florida.

FeedMikeBrownToAquaBengal is correct. Shoulda never let up on Mikey. Time to put the ol' feet on MFB's forehead and not get off!

Christ, we won't even get a decent slot in the draft....

...and the WDRevolution marches on...

PS: remind me to never run into Coles
while he's running his route

However it happpened, sweeping both Pittsburgh and Baltimore this season was pretty cool though...

...for the AFC North Division,
they did indeed 'Reach down inside', to quote M. Lewis


Brown... DEAD!
Bratkowski... DEAD!
Graham... DEAD!
Neidermeyer... DEAD!


I don't give a s#!T about sweeping the division, I want playoff WINS Goddammit!


I hope never to see Graham attempt a kick of any sort in a Bengals uniform again. Let him walk. Hell, cut him and send him a message.

Graham tried to commit suicide after the game, by shooting himself in the head, ....but he missed wide right.

i used to prefer the nomenclature Shank Graham, but now I'm leaning towards the more encompassing:

Shame Graham

You said playoff WINS, with the plural. We'll have been waiting 20 years this time, next year, for a single win, singular.

To be a Bengals fan one must be an expert in delayed gratification.

Have you guys seen the scehdule for 2010?

7 wins at BEST!

I have been a staunch supporter of Marvin and Carson throughout their tenures in Cincinnati. They've had some success despite being handcuffed by the idiocy of Mike Brown. I can't defend them anymore. I used to think that Marvin was a good motivator and knew what he was doing as a head coach. I don't really think that he is. Otherwise, his team would hbe come out confident and not made the mistakes they did. They looked like deer in headlights. I don't think that he prepared them the way he should have. I know believe that his only strength is talent evaluation. And even that can be debated (see Simpson, Jerome).
As for Carson, he is a shadow of his former self. I can't really blame him but he's had what basically equates to a major injury for every year he's started. Knee twice, elbow, nose, ankle, thumb. They had below average receivers this year, but I am of the opinion that a "franchise QB" makes guys around him better--something I don't see Carson doing. P. Manning makes guy like Garcon and Collie look like Pro Bowlers while our guys can't beat single coverge. Carson looked gunshy and I have no doubt that the 2005 knee injury was in his mind all day. He looked like the rookie while Sanchez looked like the veteran. Either he's not 100% healthy and they knew that and that's why they wanted to be a "running team", Brat is terrible, or Carson just isn't the same guy, mentally. I think it's all three. It's sad to say, but they may want to look at getting another QB in the near future. At the very least, it could light a fire under his "Queen Bee" ass.

What I'd like to see happen this offseason/next season: Get a GM, maybe a new head coach, get rid of Graham, Bratkowski, Coats, Geathers, Coles and/or Chad. Re-sign Zimmer, Roy, Tank, extend Hall, Joseph, Whitworth and Benson. Make Andre Smith a full-time starter, a lot of playing time for Coffman, be balanced offensively. The need to go after Brandon Marshall or someone of that level.

What will probably happen: Zimmer is a 50/50 of re-signing, Chad stays, text extend one corner, maybe Benson. A mediocre draft, Simpson will be gone, maybe one big name free agent (due to the economy/uncapped year and Mike Brown's cheapness), boatload of excuses and probably a 7-9 season.

Mike Brown's biggest problem is that he's loyal and stubborn. After yesterday's loss, Marvin's record as a coach is 56-57-1. Not acceptable, but he'll be retained. Bratkowski might return also under the premise that we were sucessful at running the ball. He's creating a stale atmosphere.

Mike Brown's biggest problem is he doesn't know football. His second biggest problem is he's greedy. After that his biggest problem is he's stubborn. Loyal? It's more like too lazy and cheap to go find alternatives.

Im not going to abandon Carson just yet. I imagine it would be hard to get into a rhythm throwing the ball in a game when hes really only practiced it a few times this year. If you wanna blame someone for Carsons futility and/or lack of self confidence yesterday, blame brat.

I was listening to the play by play on radio...interesting to hear Lapham diplomatically criticize the passing game saying that it was 'in a phone booth' and that Carson is 'not a dink and dunk type of quarterback.' Also said it's been that way all year. So I think Lapham is in agreement that Bratwurst should go...he just can't come right out and say it.


I apologize,

I have been a fan from a time when I have seen multiple playoff WINS, the plural, in a single season, so I know they exist.

I apologize for not being able to displaying the same delayed gratification as some of the younger fans. I am stuggling to train myself to exhibit that virtue.

Anyway, I was kind of on a rant when I typed that, I didn't proof it very well. I had attended the game and was still freshly pissed when I posted that this morning.

Project Mayhem action need to be stepped up hot and heavy for next season regrdless of the teams record!!

¡Viva La Revolucion!

It's cool that we can take the credit loans and it opens completely new possibilities.

One should love animals. They are so tasty.

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    Bengals Futility - By The Numbers

    • 20 - Years since the Bengals have won a playoff game

      0 - Total number of playoff wins in Mike Brown's tenure as owner

      .359 - Bengals regular season winning percentage since Mike Brown took over as owner (115-206-1 in 20 seasons)

      29-34-1 - Record since 2005 playoff game vs Steelers

      6 - Seasons the Bengals have lost their first six games since 1991. No other team has more than two.

      0 - Teams North of Cincinnati without an indoor practice facility

      10 - Players arrested in a 14 month span from 2005-2006

      32 - Mike Brown's ranking, out of 32, of the "Best Owners in the NFL" by Michael Silver of Sports Illustrated in 2007

      458,000,000 - Amount, in dollars, that Hamilton County Taxpayers paid to build PBS

      2032 - Year that Hamilton County will have finally paid off its debt on the stadium deal

      3 - Total number of non-clerical employees employed in the Bengals scouting department, lowest in the league

      747,000,000 - Amount, in dollars, paid in free agency by the Bengals from 1994 - 2005, second worst of all 28 teams in existence for the duration, behind only Arizona

      118 – Ranking, out of 118 professional teams, of the “Worst Franchises” in professional sports, as ranked by ESPN the Magazine in 2003.

      97 – Ranking, out of 98 general managers in all four major sports with three or more years of experience, of Mike Brown’s performance as a GM, as ranked by Forbes in 2007.

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