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Who Dey Revolution Manifesto

  • Preamble

    IN THIS TIME of perpetual Cincinnati Bengals incompetence and futility, with zero playoff wins in the nineteen seasons since the WhoDeyRevolution Godfather, Paul Brown, passed away in 1991 and handed the team to his fortunate son, the Despot, Mike Brown;

    Introduction

    WE, the members of the Who Dey Revolution, in our fervent dedication to the Cincinnati Bengals and fanatical desire to transform our hometown team into perpetual Super Bowl contenders, call for a popular revolution of fans to demand comprehensive reform to the managerial decisions and approach of Cincinnati Bengals ownership, management, staff and players, and hereby call for the adoption of the following Who Dey Revolution Manifesto:

    Manifesto Demands

    THAT the Mike Brown, Katie Blackburn, Marvin Lewis, along with every other member of the Bengals management, staff and personnel, state publicly to all Bengals fans, “I will do everything in my power to help the Cincinnati Bengals win a Super Bowl;”

    THAT Mike Brown will hire a general manager, drastically expand the scouting department and relinquish all control of player personnel;

    THAT all training, rehabilitation and medical facilities are considered best-in-class compared to other NFL teams;

    THAT the management fill the team only with players who fit the system, both mentally and physically, and are not reluctant to makes changes to player personnel when needed, regardless of cost or loyalty concerns;

    THAT offensive and defensive line depth is considered the top priority for all player personnel decisions;

    THAT all decisions made by ownership, management, staff and players, both on and off the field, are judged only by this criterion: “Does this help the Cincinnati Bengals win a Super Bowl?”

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December 11, 2009

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Keep up the exposure of their Offensive line's sorry ass run blocking, BLOW AP UP!!! MAke them one dimensional and let Fanene get reaquainted with Mr. Fun and relaxed, see how much he likes the turf when our D line knows he has to pass, I predict good things is Bengals contain the running game.
Offensively, MIX IT UP!!!!! Jesus Brat, if there is a time to do it, it's the next two weeks buddy boy. Dig deep in your treasure chest of knowledge and be unpredictable! Of course I think that's asking a bit much of the guy, given his Hx and all. Offensively, we probably would fare better if we started in a hole, forcin BRat to be creative. We won't win this game being one dimensional. I wonder how much harm the lost two plus hours riding busses to mason and back caused. Way to be Mike! Gas money for busses is way less expensive than a bubble, and YOU KNOW you won't allow this team to repeat this performance for a few years. "What? Tha salary floor gone?
I,
Jizzed
In My Pants"

Favre is my dad's favorite player, even to the point where's he overlooked the Benedict Arnold act. I hear every week of every season how great he is, even in 2005 when the Bengals HANDLED the Packers to the tune of five Favre interceptions (My dad: "It was the receivers' fault - they weren't trying hard enough to get the ball"). So yeah, I've got a vested interest in this game, and seeing the Bengals do well.

Brat's not going to do anything differently, but I think there's a good chance our line can run block well enough to chew up some clock time. Of course, this being Favre in December, the more times the Vike's offense have the ball, the more potential chances to pick him off.

They better not bring their at-Oakland or vs-Cleveland game to Minnesota. Time to play like you mean it.

Guys I am reaching out I need help. I didn't buy them but i almost went to the last game, i find myself coming to the site less and less. I need help!

Quit being a crack head RK, get your fix at home. Cheaper, safer, warmer, likely a better view (does anyone else think Endzone seats blow unless you twenty five rows up and even then it's borderline?) easy access to the pisser, no drunk strangers to deal with...... C'mon man you're better than that

Rk,

Just re-read the two parter on the one interview he gives per year to the community that has made him worth hundreds of millions of dollars:

http://www.whodeyrevolution.com/whodeyrevolution/2009/07/mike-brown-interview-part-two.html

Last home game is the Chiefs, right? Have fun with that. Now the playoffs, I don't know, that's a tasty cracker Rk. It takes will power. We believe in you.

SWB,

You going to the Jets game by any chance? This is not a setup, just a question.

WhoDey

Haha - no worries. WDR official ruling is that away game attendance is perfectly fine. I am going to pass, however, and do the usual drinking in the dark, dark back room of Phebe's. I hate the Meadowlands. Despise it. Getting there sucks, being there sucks, and getting back sucks.

I do know that a LOT of Bengals folks are going to be tailgating, if you're going, I can pass along their info so you can meet up.

Yep, we are making the trek from Cinci. I do usually hit up Phebes when in town. Last time they gave me one of the Welcome to the Jungle shirts. I have never been and have no clue what to expect from the tailgating. Any info you can pass along would be awesome.

You get my email address from the comments? If not you can contact me through the site.

Thanks.

Going to the Meadowlands cannot possibly be worse than attending a game in Oakland. Nor as risky.

Chris Berman's analysis of this game is eerily similar to yours Sleeping W Bieniemy.

He's always had a good eye and a way with words, Sly.

I actually think that the Bengals have a legitimate shot to win the next two games. I don't think they'll lose both. They'll at least take one of the next two.

In a related note, I'm going to the San Diego game next Sunday. Does this make me a "bad revolutionary" in this site's eyes because I'm buying a ticket to a Bengals game? Even if I live in Southern California and don't spend money on games at PBS? Not that what any of you say will really make me sway what I do in my own life, but I was just curious.

No, we had an official ruling that attending away games is acceptable. The monetary impact on the Bengals is so small as to be irrelevant.

TCPC -- I'll likely be at the San Diego game as well, and as SwB points out that is well within our rights as revolutionaries.

MikeBrownDelendaEst:

I'm row 3 bengals sideline like 30 yard line. Where are you going to be sitting? Got a huge group of bengals fans (and some charger fans) tailgating--you should cruise by.

By the way, Carl from Aqua Teen Hunger Force picks the Bengals this Sunday:

http://video.adultswim.com/carl/carls-pick-bengals-vs-vikings.html


Ahh, Favre bean, the grizzled veteran...He's about to have some more grizzle...Hey bean, you want some GALL to go with that grizzle?

:)

TPC and MBD...

I'm going to the San Diego game too... 5th row, Bengals sideline. Lemme know where the party is!

That Carl pick was pretty funny, other than the tired cliche of the Bengals' players being criminals.


Comrades,

My distinguished brother and myself shall also be attending the Jets game at the Meadowlands Jan 3. Anyone want to take the initiative (not me) to organize some sort of tailgate? We're gonna be taking the Metro North down so we're flexible on where to go.

FYG, for those of you not familiar with the Meadowlands...the parking situation is a fucking nightmare right now. If you can avoid driving, please do.

Either way, the Riot Juice shall be flowing early as we get ready to wrap up a first round bye. Lemme know if anyone has some plans.

Where were all you guys for the Giants game last year? I got to "enjoy" New York fans with a guy I work with who's a Bills fan and absolutely no one else. On the bright side, I was by the enormous guy with the Bengals foam tiger head and Bengals flag for a cape, so he received a lot more flak than I did.

As a side note, how uncreative do you really have to be to think "Ocho Stinko" is a good chant/insult/slander? Giants fans, Browns fans, and (unsurprisingly) Steeler fans, who seem to have lame nicknames for every team and player out there, all use it, and it's never funny or particularly witty. I do like Shampoolamalu, for whomever coined that, be it here or elsewhere.

Darling you know I love you till the end of time

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    Bengals Futility - By The Numbers

    • 20 - Years since the Bengals have won a playoff game

      0 - Total number of playoff wins in Mike Brown's tenure as owner

      .359 - Bengals regular season winning percentage since Mike Brown took over as owner (115-206-1 in 20 seasons)

      29-34-1 - Record since 2005 playoff game vs Steelers

      6 - Seasons the Bengals have lost their first six games since 1991. No other team has more than two.

      0 - Teams North of Cincinnati without an indoor practice facility

      10 - Players arrested in a 14 month span from 2005-2006

      32 - Mike Brown's ranking, out of 32, of the "Best Owners in the NFL" by Michael Silver of Sports Illustrated in 2007

      458,000,000 - Amount, in dollars, that Hamilton County Taxpayers paid to build PBS

      2032 - Year that Hamilton County will have finally paid off its debt on the stadium deal

      3 - Total number of non-clerical employees employed in the Bengals scouting department, lowest in the league

      747,000,000 - Amount, in dollars, paid in free agency by the Bengals from 1994 - 2005, second worst of all 28 teams in existence for the duration, behind only Arizona

      118 – Ranking, out of 118 professional teams, of the “Worst Franchises” in professional sports, as ranked by ESPN the Magazine in 2003.

      97 – Ranking, out of 98 general managers in all four major sports with three or more years of experience, of Mike Brown’s performance as a GM, as ranked by Forbes in 2007.

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