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Who Dey Revolution Manifesto

  • Preamble

    IN THIS TIME of perpetual Cincinnati Bengals incompetence and futility, with zero playoff wins in the nineteen seasons since the WhoDeyRevolution Godfather, Paul Brown, passed away in 1991 and handed the team to his fortunate son, the Despot, Mike Brown;

    Introduction

    WE, the members of the Who Dey Revolution, in our fervent dedication to the Cincinnati Bengals and fanatical desire to transform our hometown team into perpetual Super Bowl contenders, call for a popular revolution of fans to demand comprehensive reform to the managerial decisions and approach of Cincinnati Bengals ownership, management, staff and players, and hereby call for the adoption of the following Who Dey Revolution Manifesto:

    Manifesto Demands

    THAT the Mike Brown, Katie Blackburn, Marvin Lewis, along with every other member of the Bengals management, staff and personnel, state publicly to all Bengals fans, “I will do everything in my power to help the Cincinnati Bengals win a Super Bowl;”

    THAT Mike Brown will hire a general manager, drastically expand the scouting department and relinquish all control of player personnel;

    THAT all training, rehabilitation and medical facilities are considered best-in-class compared to other NFL teams;

    THAT the management fill the team only with players who fit the system, both mentally and physically, and are not reluctant to makes changes to player personnel when needed, regardless of cost or loyalty concerns;

    THAT offensive and defensive line depth is considered the top priority for all player personnel decisions;

    THAT all decisions made by ownership, management, staff and players, both on and off the field, are judged only by this criterion: “Does this help the Cincinnati Bengals win a Super Bowl?”

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« Sooooo...Uh...Yeah. Nice Win, Guys. | Main | 17-2 Here They Come »

October 26, 2009

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"Since nothing went wrong yesterday I am going to nitpick." are you kidding me? you need to listen to yourself. If there is nothing wrong and the Bengals Win games what is the problem. All that matters in the NFL is wins. He is a second string quarter back and your complaining about him? How about you change the name to ChicagoBearsRevolution because it looks like they need it more than the bengals do right now. Since your from Chicago.

@WDRgo*yourself -- clearly this post went completely over your head. It's a joke!

@wdrgo*yourself -- are you kidding me? you need to listen to yourself. if there is nothing wrong and the bengals win why would you even come to look at this website? all that matters to wdr is putting together a competent front office that may, just may, some day provide cincy with a PROFESSIONAL football team. everyone gets lucky every once in a while, that's how the law of averages works. the law of averages also says 18 years of no playoff wins is pretty much impossible.

Holy s**t. This just proves our point here at the Revolution... the only people that still have a problem with it (being the Revolution) obviously have no memory past 2 months ago, and probably never graduated High School... he was probably like "... theyve been reading my posts! finally they admit they hate us!!!" bahahahh!

For the general douchery that Christmas Ape brings to this blog on a semi-regular basis, that was still surprisingly funny. Good stuff.

Quite the pisshead there.
Did Brat lose his glasses on Sunday? Was he reading the playbook upside-down? Whatever he did, I hope he learned something from it. It almost seemed like he wanted to win. Let's hope the family isn't too bored during the bye week and find a way to screw things up.
Who dey!

I don't think they did anything different with the playcalling other than the stupid Wildcat formation run with Benson.

It really was just execution. Carson was flawless, the Bears were flawful.

I don't expect it to continue... Brat's still a moron.

Golly jeepers sleeping with bienemy. U were writing a post to screw with people, but I thought u took it too far for anyone to find it credible. U must be having fun knowing that there is always a pissed off dumbass that's going to comment

It's similar to when readers of FJM used to go "Joe-baiting" on Joe Morgan's ESPN chats just to mess with Joe, only I call it "douche-baiting".

Yeah I think he called the same old plays as always. But the Bengals had great execution on them. I think it's cool that Brat was willing to throw in a wildcat play. Although it didn't work well, it kept the defense on their heels when they saw Carson go out wide. I was sure in shock too. But yeah, I don't think Brat changed much at all. I just think the Bengals did the best they could with what was given to them at the time. Weren't they running a no-huddle there for a bit on that first drive? That's always when we play best.

Your Bengali Tyger vainglory compels you to heap slander on superior electro-wryters and the squadrons for which they direct their huzzahs, but your squadron will occupy its prescribed station as bottommost to the Metallurgists of Pittsburgh.

Ape - stop being funny so I won't feel conflicted about hating you.

Once again, What an eloquent, well-written article.

I have missed reading this site...been working a lot,

But I have been attending the local bar-and-grill every sunday to watch the Bengals games ( there is an analog set and snow at my place ),

and I always wear my WDR T-shirt...all the young-and-dumbs there dislike it, but of course they're just a bunch of young fresh kool-aid drinkers...

...the manager there doesn't like it because it says "HIRE A GENERAL MANAGER" on it, in real big bold letters...I think he feels overlooked (his subordinates definitely feel that way)

Well, it's Bye week, that'll give em a break :)


VIVA

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    Bengals Futility - By The Numbers

    • 20 - Years since the Bengals have won a playoff game

      0 - Total number of playoff wins in Mike Brown's tenure as owner

      .359 - Bengals regular season winning percentage since Mike Brown took over as owner (115-206-1 in 20 seasons)

      29-34-1 - Record since 2005 playoff game vs Steelers

      6 - Seasons the Bengals have lost their first six games since 1991. No other team has more than two.

      0 - Teams North of Cincinnati without an indoor practice facility

      10 - Players arrested in a 14 month span from 2005-2006

      32 - Mike Brown's ranking, out of 32, of the "Best Owners in the NFL" by Michael Silver of Sports Illustrated in 2007

      458,000,000 - Amount, in dollars, that Hamilton County Taxpayers paid to build PBS

      2032 - Year that Hamilton County will have finally paid off its debt on the stadium deal

      3 - Total number of non-clerical employees employed in the Bengals scouting department, lowest in the league

      747,000,000 - Amount, in dollars, paid in free agency by the Bengals from 1994 - 2005, second worst of all 28 teams in existence for the duration, behind only Arizona

      118 – Ranking, out of 118 professional teams, of the “Worst Franchises” in professional sports, as ranked by ESPN the Magazine in 2003.

      97 – Ranking, out of 98 general managers in all four major sports with three or more years of experience, of Mike Brown’s performance as a GM, as ranked by Forbes in 2007.

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