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Who Dey Revolution Manifesto

  • Preamble

    IN THIS TIME of perpetual Cincinnati Bengals incompetence and futility, with zero playoff wins in the nineteen seasons since the WhoDeyRevolution Godfather, Paul Brown, passed away in 1991 and handed the team to his fortunate son, the Despot, Mike Brown;

    Introduction

    WE, the members of the Who Dey Revolution, in our fervent dedication to the Cincinnati Bengals and fanatical desire to transform our hometown team into perpetual Super Bowl contenders, call for a popular revolution of fans to demand comprehensive reform to the managerial decisions and approach of Cincinnati Bengals ownership, management, staff and players, and hereby call for the adoption of the following Who Dey Revolution Manifesto:

    Manifesto Demands

    THAT the Mike Brown, Katie Blackburn, Marvin Lewis, along with every other member of the Bengals management, staff and personnel, state publicly to all Bengals fans, “I will do everything in my power to help the Cincinnati Bengals win a Super Bowl;”

    THAT Mike Brown will hire a general manager, drastically expand the scouting department and relinquish all control of player personnel;

    THAT all training, rehabilitation and medical facilities are considered best-in-class compared to other NFL teams;

    THAT the management fill the team only with players who fit the system, both mentally and physically, and are not reluctant to makes changes to player personnel when needed, regardless of cost or loyalty concerns;

    THAT offensive and defensive line depth is considered the top priority for all player personnel decisions;

    THAT all decisions made by ownership, management, staff and players, both on and off the field, are judged only by this criterion: “Does this help the Cincinnati Bengals win a Super Bowl?”

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« Drink $1 Beers at BlackFinn Sunday for the Bengals Game | Main | Picking Up the Pieces »

September 14, 2009

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Who wants to bet we start 0-3 and there is a good chance we get beat by cleveland for the 0-4 start.

Bob Bratkowski is just flat out awful. I was shitfaced in the stands, and i was calling out there plays. How does this guy have a job in the NFL?

I thought Cedric looked solid but The right side is hurting our run game hence why we drafted Andre....Thx Mike for keeping him out for a month

Outsatnding performance by the home team! So glad the blackout was lifted so we could all take in that steaming pile. Lets hope this is the end of sellouts (of course excluding Shitsbugh games) until MFB tyrannical reign is over. A POX on you Mike Brown!

Yeah, where was Scott yesterday. Isn't it time for the Bengals to buy off on the two back system? And why wasn't Chris Henry more of a factor. All I've got to say is, your offense needs to score. If they could have managed even two touchdowns, then the miracle play wouldn't have mattered.

I've seen some bad losses over the years, but that one was simply Bengalesque. Please fuck the following:
Marvin Lewis
Bratowski
Anyone in Paul Brown's immediate family
Brad St. Louis (even though he is one of Denver's best against the Bengals)

And of course, please fuck me, too.

Man, I like Zimmer. I hope he is the next Bengals coach whose career Mike Brown ruins.

Oh yeah, I forgot. Fuck Coles, too. TJ would have dropped none of those. And fuck the Bengals for not resigning TJ.


If they had taken Clady at #9 instead of Rivers then Desean Jackson in round two over Simpson I think this team is much improved. Don't get me wrong, I think Rivers is going to be a very solid, reliable player but we need a line moreso than a WLB.

Unfortunately though, once Marvin leaves, I have a feeling that Mikey will be putting Bratkowskin in our head coaching position. I don't know why I have this feeling but I do. Bratkowski should be with Bresnahan coaching in the UFL. He doesn't deserve to be in the NFL coaching...Ever.

^ the dat MFB does that i will start rooting for the steelers^

My most anticipated/favorite part of being at the game was when they flashed the "congrats on the 45th consecutive sell-out" on the jumbo-tron. What a great lie. I saw tumbleweeds in the club seats it was so empty. Regardless of that last tear-your-heart-out play, the defense played well. The offensive play calling was abysmal and Carson was plain horrible. Shoestring passes, horrible audibles and a general lack of vision picking up blitzes and knowing when your receiver is covered or not. Also I haven't seen anything posted about this, but what was up with the 18 second run-off??? They had it right the first time. Caldwell caught the ball on the 1-yard line, not out of bounds. The BOOTH challenged the play, not the Bengals. Why did the refs come back after a baffling 10 minute discussion before the kickoff and say the BENGALS were charged a timeout for the failed challenge and added time onto the clock?? The outcome was the outcome, but it would have been nice to count on the rules being on our favor for once. Can't wait for the "46th Consecutive Sell-Out," thanks to all the Steelers fans in a couple of weeks.
~Bengals, rape me once, shame on you, rape me twice, shame on me

I just knew we would find a way to lose this one. Thats what I get for paying $250 again for the sunday ticket. Offense was terrible, defense kept us in it then blew it with under 30 seconds to go?!!!! Heres to another losing season and my departure from this team for good. I dont know why I listened to the chin at the end of last year when he predicted the bengals as his surprise team. The only surprises we will be seeing are creative ways to blow games. 4-11-1 again? Seems plausable to me.

I take issue with two points from you game synopsis.

One would be that Carson has "lost some of his zip". In terms of stats, if half of his dropped balls are caught, percentage become even better. His two INTs were fluke (one tip one on game ending hail Mary). The balls he completed, like that sideline through to Chad early when he broke out, were the same laser rocket missiles we know and love. The arm is not an issue.

The other is Roy Williams. The guy is always around the football... I also happen to like the fact that he knocks people out. We need that swagger on our D if we are ever going to enter the same league as the Ravens and Steelers. Blame him all you want for the fluke ending, but the ball was thrown out and he broke on it. Maybe he could have played it safer, but that's what safties do.

Overall, we need to get a lot better to win a whole lot more games than last year. But i'm not ready to throw in the towel yet.

Artrell --

I agree. There were positives to look at, especially on D. Roy Williams is not "an abomination of a player". He was a major reason why the run D was so stout (see KNowshon Moreno, injury). Furthermore, "abominations" don't make the Pro Bowl 5 straight years. They (coaching staff) do need to realize, however, that last series Ndukwe should have been playing, not Roy. At any rate, it was a heart-breaking play, but you have to look at it like it took the Broncos a miracle play and the Bengals offense playing poorly to eke out a win. They might as well have just scored the winning TD by lateraling it 12 times. Ridiculous. If the defense continues to play well and the offense can improve (gulp), then they should be okay. Read Hobson's article today about the offense--I'm totally worried. Get the ball in Scott's and Dorsey's hands and get Fat Fudge Andre in there ASAP.

Most frustrating play of the day (outside of the last fluke): They finally bring Bernard Scott in for his first play and line him up in the slot, immediately giving the Broncos defense a heads up on where the ball was going. Result: minus 5 yards.

Brat is the worst offensive coordinator in the league.... He has been running the same F**k**g offensive for the past 5 years....and the funny thing is that my wife knows everything that he is doing.....like the bubble screen to Bernard Scott...holy shit the entire stadium knew the ball was going to him....give me a break....I am not sure why Mike Brown thinks Bratkowski is a genius...

Why in the hell haven't the Bengals tried out Jon Runyan??? May be they should try and SAVE money and convert another defensive lineman....

Pro's

Defense looks inproved from last year and our linebackers can play. While Kyle Ortan is Joe Montana the Defense is looks capible of keeping them in games. The last play was a fluke which should not have happend. But, I have a very hard time blaming the defense for the lose. The offense had them on the field a lot on a hot day. If before the game had started someone who had told you that Denver was only going to score 12 points would you have taken it? I would and in every game.

Con's

The offense seems lost. 0 points in 55 minutes of play against a weak defense? That is just poor. It starts at the top with Marvin and Brat. The offense has no "theme" to use Mike Browns words. The coaches don't adapt the plan to the talent they have. It seems like they are trying to be something thier not instead of effectively using the talent at hand. Again, if you told the offense before the game that if they score 13 points they win, would they not be thrilled?

Summation:

This is typical Bengals stuff. Until Mike Brown goes or hires a true GM, we are doomed. Now we are looking at 0-3 and will need a win in cleveland to prevent 0-4. The team will pack it in at that point, Marvin will be planning his new defensive cordinator job, Chad will want a trade, and Mike Brown will tell us that things will be better next year. GOD I HOPE I AM WRONG ABOUT THIS!

Con's

Nothing profound here, but: I've been following these clowns since '81. When I saw Stokley make his move, I didn't yell, I didn't frown, I didn't blink. Nothing shocks anymore. Nothing. In fact, when the clock was pushed back to 38 seconds from 20 with the Bengals up by a point, I told my wife: "Now watch the Bungles lose."

It's a work of art, in a way.

Agree with everything..pros and cons. Brat needs to go somewhere else and ruin another offense. The Bengals need an up and coming O coordinator that has the ambition to do more than sit in a booth and call vanilla play after vanilla play. One that maybe wants to be a Head Coach one day and walks the sidelines to CONNECT with his players...FOR FUCKS SAKE!

I too take issue with some of the above points.

1. Defense - Too early to drink the Kool-Aid. Recall the Bengals' Achilles has been surrendering deep passes. Kyle Orton possesses neither the arm nor the O-line to take advantage of such liabilities as...

2. Leon Hall - There's a reason J. Joe's name never got called. It's because every team in the league knows to throw the OTHER WAY. All I could think about as that ball hung up in the air was Darrelle Revis' 8 career interceptions and his 1st of 10 Pro Bowl appearances last year (...and trust me, no one throws the ball at him). And I thought about how Mikey stood pat 18 and let two better-run organizations trade ahead of him to scoop the DE (Jarvis Moss) and CB they were eyeing. This despite the fact that everyone in the universe knew there was a talent gap between Revis and Hall, who was torched deep 12,245 times in college. But I digress..

3. Roy Williams - Hitting? Oh, my bad. I thought the Bengals have suffered with poor PASS COVERAGE for 5 years. And wasn't hitting Marvin White's calling card? and didn't we just cut him? And didn't he just get picked up by the team that CUT Roy Williams? Did we get the older, more expensive version of what we already had?

4. Laveraneus Coles - Was that TJ's replacement dropping 3 passes? Ya, he's cheaper. By $1 million per (assuming he plays out the whole contract, which he won't because he's a cap friendly cut after this year) but you get what you pay for. Add to that last year's 2nd round reach that hasn't seen the field in a meaningful way (great scouting guys!) and it's easy to see why you get one winning season in 124907 years.

5. O-Line - This is the scariest part. And I won't rag on Collins because he's not a mauler and never was and should not be playing right tackle. Especially not in this division. He fared pretty well on the left last year in place of Levi. But next on the schedule are 4 3-4 (or hybrid 3-4) defenses and he is not equipped to handle bull-rushing left ends or strong side backers. And I think Livings just went down.

(gulp)

I need someone to explain to me how they do any better than a 2-4 start.

HA, theme creator is dead on, on all points. Brat called one of the worst games that I've ever seen him call..... HIM! We had a passing attack that was stalled on two drives by a Coles drop on easy first down catches. Apparently establishing the run and short passing game is more important than sustaining drives and winning games. I HATE BOB BRATKOWSKI!!!!!!!!!!! Collins looked bad, but What happened to Nate Livings? I saw Mathis at left guard after the second quarter and have seen no injury report or anything else. Chad looked good when he was PAYING ATTENTION! Ced is not a bad runner, in fact, Ced is a pretty good runner, I want to see MUCH more Scott, but I disagree completely with that one. And there is no excuse for not trying to get the ball to Henry more, Marvin said one catch is a good line for him........... REALLY, REALLY MARVIN? D line looked pretty good for the most part, linebackers played well, (particulalry Maualuga and Rivers) and so did the secondary. Disagree about Roy too, no, he's not what he once was, but getting beat on the last play was not a bad decision, somone said it, He's a safety, he's gonna break on the ball, he played well otherwise. Hall got shafted on the last play, made an unbelievable play and got shafted, or Bengalized, however you want to put it. Bo strikes again, almighty Bo.

Why does Brad St Louis still have a job?
Why does Bratkowski still have a job?
Why does Mike Brown still have a job?

All unanswerable questions, really.

With this catastrophic loss, I see 2-14 or 3-13 coming. The Bungles have always had a fragile psyche -- after the Wicky Wacky play a pretty good team imploded for a whole year after the strike ended (even though they were good enough the following year to almost win the Super Bowl... basically the same damn players)

Wake me when Mike Brown dies. Maybe Pumpkin can be convinced to hire a GM.

Very embarrassed, as a veteran I truly hope that people take their jobs more seriously than Brat.........he must have pictures of Mike Brown with a goat or an underaged boy somewhere because I don't see how this guy could even coach high schoolers. Suit Brat up and maybe he could show them what he's talking about because he sure as hell cannot translate to the players verbally! And even you guys(WDR staff) started to believe we could do something this year.........stick to your guns and sink this pathetic ship.

On another topic, can WDR talk to the owners of the Bottom Line (aka, the DC 'Bengals Bar') and ask them to PLEASE hire a few waiters/waitresses? I think they had 4 people working yesterday, and the service sucked ass the whole day.

They're basically the bar version of the Bengals right now-saving a few dollars on staff, and it's hard as hell to get a beer or anything to eat there. I'm pretty much done with that place until they hire enough staff. I know they're the Bengals Bar, but there are about 200 other places in DC to watch football, and most of those actually have table service.

It's bad enough i have to watch the Bengals; I should be able to easily order and consume beer and food with reckless abandon.

Let’s just face it Brat saw cover 2 and his nuts shriveled like always. My question to Brat is how do teams like the Patriots find ways to beat cover 2? CREATIVITY BOB you didn’t have it last year, the year before, or the year before that. Really you never had it. Please some call up Mike Martz, Brian Billick, Steve Mariucci, hell I’ll take Uncle Rico at this point.

Year after year this team has no identity, especially offensively? Are they two-TE, fullback/RB "smashmouth? NO. You need your 1st round draft pick in camp to be that. Are they 'controlled passing' dink'n'dunk? No, you need a mobile/creative QB for that. Are they pass-sets-up-the-run, go for the homerun type of team? Seems right based on their talents. But I ask you, how many passes where thrown in the vincinity of the endzone? ZERO.

yeah, i could go on with the same themes as everyone here about the game action, but what i found even more frustrating was the "ambiance" at the fucking bottom line shit hole in d.c. that stupid twat that dresses like a taxi driving marvin lewis sitting there and dropping fuck bombs in front of a little kid. kicking the wall like a whiny bitch. every tv at the worst possible angle for any seat in the place. zero wait staff. monkeys for bartenders who give you diet coke instead of coke because they don't feel like telling you they don't have regular coke. then you have to wait in purgatory to get that corrected. the "skyline" isn't fucking skyline. i could buy the real shit from harris teeter for less than what they're charging. and by far, above all. the dickfaces that organize the wdr shit at that bar don't have the goddamn music right when we score. play the fucking bang on the drums song when we score and stop the ridiculous extended jam version of jungle boogie. note that down for advisement and go down on me with that bullshit bar.

Not that I want to defend Marvin Lewis for the sake of defending Marvin Lewis, but I do think his comment about Chris Henry is being a little misinterpreted. I realize that saying "One ball one catch is a pretty good day" makes him sound like a buffoon, but I'm pretty sure he wasn't talking about statistics.

I think what he meant was that Chris caught the only ball thrown his way, which means he did his job. Chris therefore played well, and it's not his fault that he didn't see more opportunities. And the reason he didn't see more opportunities, purportedly, is what Carson was saying - that he was being blanketed by Denver's secondary and the looks just weren't there. Which then begs the question of why he wasn't running routes that would get him open. And whose fault would that be?

Oh yeah. Bob Bratkowski.

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    Bengals Futility - By The Numbers

    • 20 - Years since the Bengals have won a playoff game

      0 - Total number of playoff wins in Mike Brown's tenure as owner

      .359 - Bengals regular season winning percentage since Mike Brown took over as owner (115-206-1 in 20 seasons)

      29-34-1 - Record since 2005 playoff game vs Steelers

      6 - Seasons the Bengals have lost their first six games since 1991. No other team has more than two.

      0 - Teams North of Cincinnati without an indoor practice facility

      10 - Players arrested in a 14 month span from 2005-2006

      32 - Mike Brown's ranking, out of 32, of the "Best Owners in the NFL" by Michael Silver of Sports Illustrated in 2007

      458,000,000 - Amount, in dollars, that Hamilton County Taxpayers paid to build PBS

      2032 - Year that Hamilton County will have finally paid off its debt on the stadium deal

      3 - Total number of non-clerical employees employed in the Bengals scouting department, lowest in the league

      747,000,000 - Amount, in dollars, paid in free agency by the Bengals from 1994 - 2005, second worst of all 28 teams in existence for the duration, behind only Arizona

      118 – Ranking, out of 118 professional teams, of the “Worst Franchises” in professional sports, as ranked by ESPN the Magazine in 2003.

      97 – Ranking, out of 98 general managers in all four major sports with three or more years of experience, of Mike Brown’s performance as a GM, as ranked by Forbes in 2007.

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