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Who Dey Revolution Manifesto

  • Preamble

    IN THIS TIME of perpetual Cincinnati Bengals incompetence and futility, with zero playoff wins in the nineteen seasons since the WhoDeyRevolution Godfather, Paul Brown, passed away in 1991 and handed the team to his fortunate son, the Despot, Mike Brown;


    WE, the members of the Who Dey Revolution, in our fervent dedication to the Cincinnati Bengals and fanatical desire to transform our hometown team into perpetual Super Bowl contenders, call for a popular revolution of fans to demand comprehensive reform to the managerial decisions and approach of Cincinnati Bengals ownership, management, staff and players, and hereby call for the adoption of the following Who Dey Revolution Manifesto:

    Manifesto Demands

    THAT the Mike Brown, Katie Blackburn, Marvin Lewis, along with every other member of the Bengals management, staff and personnel, state publicly to all Bengals fans, “I will do everything in my power to help the Cincinnati Bengals win a Super Bowl;”

    THAT Mike Brown will hire a general manager, drastically expand the scouting department and relinquish all control of player personnel;

    THAT all training, rehabilitation and medical facilities are considered best-in-class compared to other NFL teams;

    THAT the management fill the team only with players who fit the system, both mentally and physically, and are not reluctant to makes changes to player personnel when needed, regardless of cost or loyalty concerns;

    THAT offensive and defensive line depth is considered the top priority for all player personnel decisions;

    THAT all decisions made by ownership, management, staff and players, both on and off the field, are judged only by this criterion: “Does this help the Cincinnati Bengals win a Super Bowl?”

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« Bengals at Blackfinn: Who's Coming With Me? | Main | Top 5 Wins In Marvin Lewis's Career »

September 20, 2009


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This lone win justifies at least seven more years of suckitude, tweets Mike Brown...

The best thing to come out of this win is seeing Baghdad Hob write this unparalleled gem:

"Now next Sunday it is Blitzinnati vs. Blitzburgh. Mike Zimmer, the Bengals' resident professor of pressure, will be pitted against Dick LeBeau, the dean in charge of sacks."

In two sentences he has achieved a higher degree of spinnitude and wordination than he had ever reached in all his years of writing. Hob, you are truly the frontrunner of fluff.

Say what you want: Except for the sloppy penalties, the Bengals almost looked like a professional football team Sunday. Scary.

The Bengals won a game on the road in the 90s?

You guys are the softest revolution that I have ever seen. Jesus christ, make up your minds if you want Mike Brown to give up the operations of the team. Every win is more empowerment for the worst owner in sports. We need this team to lose every game so that Mikey will surrender the operations of the team. This is the worst revolution I have ever seen. "Oh we want change but if the team wins then this whole 'revolution' idea is out the window." Take a stand. Root for them to lose. Thats a real resolution. The Who Dey Resolution.



I personally am a Cincinnati Bengals fan FIRST and then a MFB hater second. I can cheer for my team and not Give him money. According to you we must hate the team. So if we hate the team why have a revolution?

Well what is the point of this revolution? Is it to make sure we personally don't line Mikey's pockets or is it for the greater good of this city? As long as this team wins 6-8 games, the city is going to continue to fork over money and Mikey is going to run the team the way he always has (a losing team). So yeah, you can support the team and not pay mikey but then nothing will ever change. I want Carson Palmer to win a super bowl. I'm not naive enough to believe that it's going to happen with Mike Brown running the team. So we need for them to lose as many games as possible so real change will happen.


I agree, DD.

What the hell is this place? I thought it was a revolution. We're supposed to be about taking down the man, but the first time they beat a NFC North mediocre team, it's all "We're going to the Superbowl!"

A revolution is not waiting for an apple to ripen then fall. You have to make it fall.

Kate & DD - revolution requires mass participation. If our policy here was to root for the Bengals to lose we'd have like 12 readers. Not giving Mike Brown money while rooting for the players can still get the job done.

So we're douches - who cares? As a fan of the team, I'm never going to consciously wish for them to lose, no matter how badly I hate Mike Brown. I can't even consciously root for the Ravens or the Browns to lose unless they're playing the Bengals. In fact, the only two teams I actively wish losses upon each and every Sunday are the Patriots and the Steelers. And, realistically, do you think an 0-16 season would cause Mike Brown to sell the Bengals or even change anything? Worked really well in Detroit last year, didn't it? I mean, WC Ford's car company is basically government-run now, his team went 0-16 last year (and 1-25 in the last 26), and he hasn't sold yet or really done anything other than get rid of Matt Millen (which hasn't proven anything in terms of building a winning franchise either).

So why would I wish for the only joy I derive on a Sunday to be taken away when, in all likelihood, it wouldn't do any good anyway?

DD and Kato,

Are you suggesting MB is influenced by losses? Obviously you haven't been a Bengal fan for very long. MB loves money above all else and is the only thing that can change the senile bastard.

@Wyatt -- Ford Motor Company didn't take any guvmint money. They may be terrible NFL owners but they aren't on the dole like Wall Street.

An 0-16 season would not cause Mike Brown to do anything, especially if fans continue to buy Bengals merch and show up at PBS to watch more losses, or get false hope based on a fluke win against an overrated Packers team.

Recall, this effort to push on thick-skulled Mike Brown and the NFL in response to the record-breaking Bengals suckitude has been tried before, e.g.

[That's Dec 29, 2001 for those keeping score at home]

After the disenchantment over the lost decade Mike Brown and the NFL pretended Marvin Lewis would fix it all, e.g.

But this season's 'Hard Knocks' showed how nothing really has changed, which is why 2005 was a fluke. (Not to mention last season's redemption of Chris Henry which Lewis publicly opposed, and then had to swallow hard)

It's really a tough problem to crack, much like Mike Brown has the thickest skull in the history of the human race. End Bengals Welfare as we know it, and maybe -- just maybe -- things will change. Continue to show up at PBS with your dollars, and you are guaranteed to continue to get robbed.

Do people here really think that if the Bengals stink real bad the NFL will come in and intervine??? There is about as much of a chance of that happening as money magically growing on trees. The Bengals losing a all their games will just convince MB that he needs a new coach. How many losses were there in the 90's and he's still in charge, more losing seasons won't change that. Sorry but it's a pipe dream.

@Factcorrecter: Probably you're right, but it's never been tried before. No team in NFL history has stunk as much as the Bengals do, for as long. No fan base has organized as much as Cincy. It's all uncharted water. The last time this was tried in 2001-2002, the NFL didn't do much, but they did breathe an audible sigh of relief that they could pretend Marvin Lewis would change things, see the article I posted here:

The commish doesn't show up in every city when they get a new coach praising the new regime before it's taken office and saying the team is going to win more.

Anyway, there is more of a chance of a fan boycott leading to changes then there is of a Mike Brown general-managed team winning the Super Bowl. The former has a tiny chance, the latter has ZERO chance.

Honestly i don't think anything, no amount of losing, no league intervention would make MB give up the GM title. He'd have to have health issues the prevented him from running the day to day. As much as he drives me nuts think about it, if your Dad owned a car repair shop that he built from scratch and took you there everyday growing up telling you someday it would be your shop. Even if you were one of the worst mechanics in the area would you just throw in the towel and let someone else run your dad's shop that he gave you?? The bengals could go 0-16 three straight years but MB wouldn't give up being in charge since probably thinks he has to keep running it to make his daddy proud. Hard Knocks showed a little bit of that.

Side note, my pipe dream would be Parcell's bolting from Miami which could happen this offseason and watching him take over the Bengals. A boy can dream right??

And you are all lost. Your revolution is for shit, because you aren't willing to take it to the next level.

Have fun with your little stunts acting like you make a difference.

I'll be on the front line, and morons like you are in my sights.

Don't you all get it??? A revolution requires a change in popular culture. That means they have to lose so the less politically active understand.

It means we need to root for them to lose, and when people ask why we are fans but root for them to lose, we tell them WHY!

You think the French Revolution would have succeeded if they rooted everytime the French put down an uprising???

And it is completely embarassing that someone would come on a site called "whodeyrevolution" and say "there's nothing we can do about it".

If you have that attitude, then you have no idea what a revolution is about.

Right on Kato!!

You have to realize that by rooting for them to lose, it will have a direct correlation with Mike Brown's pockets. I know the NFL won't intervene if they go 0-16. I know Mike Brown won't hire a GM if the go 0-16. But I know the NFL and Mike Brown will do something if he isn't making as much money. That's why you root for them to lose. If they lose, he loses money, resulting in the light going off in Mikeys head that says "wow, they finally mean it, I actually have to provide a reach around for the city I have bent over for the last 20 years." And Boom, there's your "revolution!"

Who Dey Resolution!

you tell them Kato, you sure are fighting the good fight. 3 comments in a row! How does one man do it?

How can a "fan" root for their team to lose? I was rooting for the Steelers to lose yesterday, does that make me a fan?

It is a fucking game, slow your roll douchebag.

The difference between this revolution and the french revolution you mention? I don't know, loss of life, human rights, violence. Get a life.

Sleeping with Bienemy,

I respectfully disagree with you. There needs to be action. And action means we need to take it to the streets. Make people who talk about how what will make the team good feel stupid. Make them feel stupid for rooting for this team before the owner gives up. Make people not go down to PBS.

A revolution does not sit in a corner and bitch.

If there is no one there tailgating, and there are blackouts, if there is complete fan apathy, he will have to change.

Fan apathy should be the goal of this revolution.

The fact that you site how many readers you would have is embarrassing to the cause.

Kato, everyone you are all right, I'm sooo wrong. If he root for our team to "lose" we all will win in the end, lol. Why care if you want them to lose? Anyway your idea won't work if everyone in town stopped going to the games and PB stadium was empty week after week do you really think the league will sweeping in and force MB to put a great GM in and not some idiot he picks and still pulls the strings??? One of two things would ultimately happen, most likely if people stop going to the games and root for the Bengals to lose the league won't make MB do anything, they'll just take the Bengals and move them to LA. Is that what we want, Cincinnati won't get another team if it goes down like that.
The other thing would be even if MB was forced to put a GM in do you really think he'd hire a Poli etc, no he'd hire some ex coach/assistant/family member/etc who he'd put in the "GM" role and then tell them exactly what to do and give them no authority. Kinda like the GM in Miami (he don't blink unless Parcells tells him to).

Sorry to be honest.

Whitworth looked great one of those holding calls was BS....Cedric is having alot nice runs to the left side.....He also held elvis to 0 sacks last week

Kato, I totally agree that copious amounts of Bengals losses would be better for the long-term health of this franchise than would success on the field this season. If I had the ability to ensure the Bengals lost every remaining game on the schedule, I would do it (assuming I also had the understanding that such would bring about eventual positive change, of course).

That said, what do you expect here? What do you want this blog to be doing? Would you rather see a post about the Green Bay saying "The Bengals won this weekend. This is UNACCEPTABLE." They're already flying banners, calling for total boycotts, and attempting to help create tv blackouts. WDR has zero control on the win/loss column, and if they were to post about how upsetting it is that the Bengals actually won a game, that would equate to "sitting in a corner and bitching." It's out of our control.

You clearly have the goals of the cause in mind and are passionate about it - so I ask you, why are you sitting here insulting people for conversing about a Bengals win they had no control over, instead of spreading the word to people who don't already know? Seems like a poor and misguided use of time.

~ grammatical correction: "Would you rather see a post about the Green Bay GAME saying..."

I'm a picky little thing.

Back to the matter at hand - are we really that concerned with Whit's holds? Personally, I'd rather they face third and 20 or so and/or not score on a drive than someone getting a free shot on Carson. Other than possibly the Minnesota game, I can't really see a game where the Bengals are going to need to score on EVERY drive, and they've certainly got a better chance of scoring after a hold than without Palmer.

I'm not entirely sure that even makes sense the way I phrased it, but I hope the point I'm trying to get across (Palmer getting hurt, AGAIN, is worse than a few holding calls that potentially stall out drives) comes through.

Wyatt, the point is with an offensive line that meets WDR's standards (which would include Whit playing his natural spot at guard and not tackle), he'd never NEED to hold to prevent Carson from being hit. Eliminating holds doesn't equate to "let the defender run unabated to the quarterback." It equates to "Play better or hire someone who can."


I'm certainly aware of the goals of the Revolution - I'm simply referring to the offensive line that the Bengals currently start. Ideally, yes, they'd have no holds or sacks, but that's simply no realistic with the personnel that they have right now. So, in the real world, not under ideal laboratory circumstances, I'm content with having a guy playing left tackle who's smart enough to hold somebody when they are otherwise just going to have a free shot on our franchise player. As he gets better at it, the holding calls will decrease, as, like every other left tackle in the league, he'll learn the little tricks that will allow him to hold and not get called for it.

Just who do you thinkg they could go out and "hire" Mockenrue?? There wasn't a strong class of FA lineman unless they wanted to completely overpay Jason Brown or Birk like their respective teams did. Jeff Saturday was the only good FA option but the Colts were not going to let him go.

Factcorrecter (and I should note that you misspelled "corrector"), playing professional football is a job. Everyone on that field has a contract; everyone is employed by his franchise. Hiring someone therefore does not merely equate to signing free agents, but to any means of acquiring players - be it through trades, the draft, free agency, or even extending the contracts of the talented players you already have (Eric Steinbach, anyone?). By the same token, the ownership is accountable in a "Win consistently or hire someone who can" sort of mode. It works on all levels.

Halo saya begitu gembira saya menemukan halaman blog Anda, saya benar-benar menemukan Anda secara tidak sengaja, ketika aku sedang mencari di Yahoo untuk sesuatu yang lain, Anyways saya di sini sekarang dan hanya ingin mengucapkan terima kasih untuk posting fantastis dan semua menyenangkan putaran blog (saya juga suka tema / desain), saya tidak punya waktu untuk membaca melalui semua itu pada saat ini tetapi saya memiliki buku-ditandai dan juga menambahkan RSS feed, jadi ketika saya ada waktu saya akan kembali untuk membaca banyak lagi, Tolong jangan terus bekerja dengan fantastis.

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    Bengals Futility - By The Numbers

    • 20 - Years since the Bengals have won a playoff game

      0 - Total number of playoff wins in Mike Brown's tenure as owner

      .359 - Bengals regular season winning percentage since Mike Brown took over as owner (115-206-1 in 20 seasons)

      29-34-1 - Record since 2005 playoff game vs Steelers

      6 - Seasons the Bengals have lost their first six games since 1991. No other team has more than two.

      0 - Teams North of Cincinnati without an indoor practice facility

      10 - Players arrested in a 14 month span from 2005-2006

      32 - Mike Brown's ranking, out of 32, of the "Best Owners in the NFL" by Michael Silver of Sports Illustrated in 2007

      458,000,000 - Amount, in dollars, that Hamilton County Taxpayers paid to build PBS

      2032 - Year that Hamilton County will have finally paid off its debt on the stadium deal

      3 - Total number of non-clerical employees employed in the Bengals scouting department, lowest in the league

      747,000,000 - Amount, in dollars, paid in free agency by the Bengals from 1994 - 2005, second worst of all 28 teams in existence for the duration, behind only Arizona

      118 – Ranking, out of 118 professional teams, of the “Worst Franchises” in professional sports, as ranked by ESPN the Magazine in 2003.

      97 – Ranking, out of 98 general managers in all four major sports with three or more years of experience, of Mike Brown’s performance as a GM, as ranked by Forbes in 2007.

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