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Who Dey Revolution Manifesto

  • Preamble

    IN THIS TIME of perpetual Cincinnati Bengals incompetence and futility, with zero playoff wins in the nineteen seasons since the WhoDeyRevolution Godfather, Paul Brown, passed away in 1991 and handed the team to his fortunate son, the Despot, Mike Brown;

    Introduction

    WE, the members of the Who Dey Revolution, in our fervent dedication to the Cincinnati Bengals and fanatical desire to transform our hometown team into perpetual Super Bowl contenders, call for a popular revolution of fans to demand comprehensive reform to the managerial decisions and approach of Cincinnati Bengals ownership, management, staff and players, and hereby call for the adoption of the following Who Dey Revolution Manifesto:

    Manifesto Demands

    THAT the Mike Brown, Katie Blackburn, Marvin Lewis, along with every other member of the Bengals management, staff and personnel, state publicly to all Bengals fans, “I will do everything in my power to help the Cincinnati Bengals win a Super Bowl;”

    THAT Mike Brown will hire a general manager, drastically expand the scouting department and relinquish all control of player personnel;

    THAT all training, rehabilitation and medical facilities are considered best-in-class compared to other NFL teams;

    THAT the management fill the team only with players who fit the system, both mentally and physically, and are not reluctant to makes changes to player personnel when needed, regardless of cost or loyalty concerns;

    THAT offensive and defensive line depth is considered the top priority for all player personnel decisions;

    THAT all decisions made by ownership, management, staff and players, both on and off the field, are judged only by this criterion: “Does this help the Cincinnati Bengals win a Super Bowl?”

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July 29, 2009

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QUEEN BEES !!!! QUEEEEEEEN BEEEEEEES !!!!!!!

"This year we want to prove we're a winning team. That it's the kind of team that can be a playoff team."

Wow. I hope MB didn't just figure out that the teams that win are the ones that go to the playoffs. Then again, that would explain the last 20 years. Glad we got that straightened out.

To clarify Delta5243's comment for those not in the loop, an AP excerpt:

----
Two teams that might have seemed like a logical destination -- the Miami Dolphins and Cincinnati Bengals -- said they wouldn't pursue Vick.

Bengals owner Mike Brown refers to himself as "a redeemer" and is known for giving troubled players a second chance, or more. But Cincinnati has a full complement of quarterbacks, and starter Carson Palmer has fully recovered from an elbow injury that sidelined him for 12 games last season.

"When you have a situation like ours, he's a very difficult fit," Brown said of Vick. "Quarterbacks are like queen bees -- you can only have one of them before they start stepping on each other. And we have ours. Carson's the guy. That's why it just doesn't fit for here in a football sense."
----

"Quarterbacks are like queen bees." Wisdom for the ages.

Isn't the Queen Bee really not the Leader and only has all of her workers doing everything for her? Plus, a Queen Bee is a female. LOL What a maroon MFB is!

Why can't Mike Brown just kick the bucket already?

MikeBrownIsScum: You are wondering why MBB hasn't kicked the bucket? Think about what you are 'saying,' because the alternative is even worse! You could have KBBB ruining (and I do mean ruining -- instead of 'running') the show.

Nope, the whole idea and the only way to get rid of the scourge that is the Brown Family was to get them to leave the city of Cincinnati. We had that chance 10 years ago. I 'voted' for it, too bad not enough others had done the same thing. You who didn't vote for it back then -- and are crying about it now... ...you have only to look in the mirror as you were the cause.

Thanks Mockenrue....I just cannot get that line out of my head..I keep saying it to random people throughout the day whenever football comes up....not to mention hearing that MFB "speech" was very similar to listening to Sarah Palin give her farewell, I'm quitting, fuck you guys speech....very hard to follow, a lot of contradictions, and overall just very painful to watch - due in part to me falling out of my chair on so many occasions because of my brain just shutting itself down.....

and for the record....I see Mikey Boy as the "queen bee" not Carson..it makes a lot more sense if you look at it from that perspective

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    Bengals Futility - By The Numbers

    • 20 - Years since the Bengals have won a playoff game

      0 - Total number of playoff wins in Mike Brown's tenure as owner

      .359 - Bengals regular season winning percentage since Mike Brown took over as owner (115-206-1 in 20 seasons)

      29-34-1 - Record since 2005 playoff game vs Steelers

      6 - Seasons the Bengals have lost their first six games since 1991. No other team has more than two.

      0 - Teams North of Cincinnati without an indoor practice facility

      10 - Players arrested in a 14 month span from 2005-2006

      32 - Mike Brown's ranking, out of 32, of the "Best Owners in the NFL" by Michael Silver of Sports Illustrated in 2007

      458,000,000 - Amount, in dollars, that Hamilton County Taxpayers paid to build PBS

      2032 - Year that Hamilton County will have finally paid off its debt on the stadium deal

      3 - Total number of non-clerical employees employed in the Bengals scouting department, lowest in the league

      747,000,000 - Amount, in dollars, paid in free agency by the Bengals from 1994 - 2005, second worst of all 28 teams in existence for the duration, behind only Arizona

      118 – Ranking, out of 118 professional teams, of the “Worst Franchises” in professional sports, as ranked by ESPN the Magazine in 2003.

      97 – Ranking, out of 98 general managers in all four major sports with three or more years of experience, of Mike Brown’s performance as a GM, as ranked by Forbes in 2007.

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