KissingSuzyKolber has an article today about Chris Berman that I don't think goes far enough. Although it is evident that Big Daddy Drew is not a fan, I was hoping for a piece so hate-filled that it would transcend the plane between the internet and the outside world, instantly vaporizing Berman and all his smug shtick.
I've lightly touched on the topic of ESPN/Berman before but let me reiterate, he is the worst personality in sports broadcasting. I'd take an infinite loop of Joe Theismann, Hubie Brown and Tim McCarver calling every game in every sport if it meant I never had to hear him turn a straightforward highlight into a bad pun again. It depresses me to think that people out there find him entertaining.
ESPN deserves a lot of credit for making sports such a cultural phenomenon, but in the last 10-15 years I really think it has made all of us dumber in the way we look at sports. ESPN does not make people think about sports analytically. Like a baby, it makes us consume sports information in tiny little morsels, which affects people's views. Instead of getting a discussion on Chad's merits as a receiver, three talking heads yak it up about Chad's sideline antics. Instead of talking about the Bengals as a team, we get a clip of Marvin jogging onto the field and then Mark Schlereth saying he's on the hot seat. This stuff does not make you more informed, it does the opposite and reinforces black and white opinions that they hammer into their viewers head over and over. ESPN could be entertaining and smart considering how much is at their disposal and yet the media empire decided to make people view sports through a tiny prism where there is no room for grey areas or wide ranging ideas. It's sad.
This hurts Bengals fans because a lot of us only get our news and form our opinions form what ESPN tells us. They don't talk about how our ownership is a living breathing hex. How our O Coordinator should be selling tacos out of the back of a van. The sorts of things that bother WhoDeyRev to no end. So I guess what I'm trying to say is next time you get the chance, don't watch ESPN or Berman.
I couldn't agree more. ESPN doesn't report sports they peddle it.
They lost me years ago when they reported allegations made by Michael Strahan's wife during their divorce hearing as "breaking news".
They create controversy in sports, not report it. Listen to mike and mike some time and see what sort of brainless useless sports derived debate they have going. Like comparing Roger Federer to Tiger Woods or some other absolutely contrived argument.
ESPN = Extra Stupid Propoganda Network
Posted by: J M | June 09, 2009 at 07:48 PM
I disagree about Berman being the worst sports personality. I feel that honor goes to Tony Kornheiser. Monday Night Football became virtually unwatchable (at least with sound on) thanks to his disgraceful attempts to become Joe "Hilarity" Everyguy. Thank goodness they found some semblance of sense and gave his broadcast spot to Jon Gruden.
Posted by: Mockenrue | June 09, 2009 at 10:44 PM
Mackenrue: 100% on the money. I actually like Berman, but Kornheiser and Jim Rome make me want to kill myself with a rusty spork.
Posted by: Scott Ricketts | June 10, 2009 at 09:26 AM
I really dont have an opinion on this because i don't watch they lost me years ago right around the end of the 05' season.
Posted by: RK | June 10, 2009 at 10:12 AM
Mockenrue, I could not have said it better myself.
I quit watching sports center when I started getting the NFL Network. More news, better news, and less stupidity.
Posted by: Robinsgr | June 10, 2009 at 10:20 AM
ESPN is yet another victim of the pervading theory in the media that they need to appeal to the lowest common denominator. There might be plenty of idiots out there, but they end up forgetting that we don't all belong to that group. National sports talk shows, ESPN's included, are largely a waste of time.
Posted by: Major Payne | June 10, 2009 at 11:38 AM
You're with me, leather
Yeah, Berman has drug us down, Madden made us all a little smarter, or maybe he made me smarter and I appreciated the game even more.
Berman and some of the other jackasses can go home.
Posted by: 5chw4r7z | June 10, 2009 at 12:12 PM
i hate espn for the constant advertising... it's not just the "hot seat", it's the budweiser hot seat with the 6-pack of questions" followed by "Coor's cold hard facts"
Posted by: fulton | June 10, 2009 at 01:40 PM
Good editorial. I agree Kornheiser and Rome are worse, but they don't noone really respects Kornheiser and Rome doesn't weild the audience Berman does, so in terms of threat to our sports intelligence Berman is worse.
Unfortunately, the same point can be made about almost all of our (former) information sources - cable news, newspapers, even music...
NFL Network goes both ways. Sometimes brilliant. Sometimes a 168-hour Favreathon.
Posted by: P. Simonov | June 10, 2009 at 02:23 PM
Everybody knows TV is idiotic, but all of you really just take sports way too seriously. nice article here, but who gives a shit?
dont like ESPN? start your own sports television network...im sure YOU will figure out a way to make a sports channel "smart."
Posted by: williamsgevoort | June 10, 2009 at 02:52 PM
Greatest WhoDeyRev article to date. I hate Berman and his slobbering highlights.
Posted by: Gambling Fool | June 10, 2009 at 03:05 PM
I agree with Major Payne. ESPN chooses to appeal to the low-level sports fans that only care to know what they tell them.
And williamsgevoort, take what ever you care about deeply and insert said interest into your statement: 'Don't like (Established Network) Start your own (your interest) network...I'm sure YOU will figure out to make a (Interest) channel "smart".'
You're an idiot.
Posted by: Bob | June 10, 2009 at 03:21 PM
He could.......be........one........fat.........fuck.
Posted by: Rich | June 10, 2009 at 05:53 PM
I don't care what anyone says. Hubie Brown is an awesome announcer. He actually knows something about basketball, Doug Collins does not.
I can't believe you didn't include Steve "The Special in Special Teams" Tasker. Just terrible.
Posted by: Willie D | June 10, 2009 at 08:58 PM
Let's be honest here guys, this is nothing but "Boomer Bias" and I suffer from it myself. In our hearts and minds, there is only one Boomer, and it's not this semi-coherent, lard-loving, catch-phrase-spouting jackhole.
To the guy who said Madden made us smarter - how? By drawing pictures on a screen that got more or more jumbled and less and less coherent as time went on? By saying "boom!", "pow!", or some other 1960's Batman TV show sound effect at the end of every sentence? By managing to work in Frank Winters' "Bag o Donuts" nickname every Packers game he called, even for years after Winters' retirement? By generally being a fat, slovenly, barely enunciating loaf? By subjecting his broadcast partners to the auditory torture that is him chewing, swallowing, and then attempting to talk while doing one or both for an entire three-hour game broadcast?
So yeah, in case you can't tell, I hate Madden, and I feel that Berman comes from the same school of broadcasting - all catch-phrases and neck fat jiggling and no actual substance to speak of.
Posted by: Wyatt | June 11, 2009 at 11:02 AM
ok Bob. First of all, I have no idea what you mean, as I am calling out a tired complaint about television. I mean, does what Sly said even require commenting on? This is the oldest and most insipid arguments one could make in the year 2009. Congratulations Sly, you discovered that TV is for stupid people. And congrats to you Boob, you agree.
All I have to say is stop your investigation now, you might just discover how depraved and mindless sports is in general. I mean, you try talking about sports for fucking 20 years straight and then we will see what you become.
Posted by: williamsgevoort | June 11, 2009 at 01:33 PM
williamsgevoort,
i'm surprised you get ESPN through your aluminum foil helmet.
Posted by: Brian | June 13, 2009 at 11:05 PM