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Who Dey Revolution Manifesto

  • Preamble

    IN THIS TIME of perpetual Cincinnati Bengals incompetence and futility, with zero playoff wins in the nineteen seasons since the WhoDeyRevolution Godfather, Paul Brown, passed away in 1991 and handed the team to his fortunate son, the Despot, Mike Brown;

    Introduction

    WE, the members of the Who Dey Revolution, in our fervent dedication to the Cincinnati Bengals and fanatical desire to transform our hometown team into perpetual Super Bowl contenders, call for a popular revolution of fans to demand comprehensive reform to the managerial decisions and approach of Cincinnati Bengals ownership, management, staff and players, and hereby call for the adoption of the following Who Dey Revolution Manifesto:

    Manifesto Demands

    THAT the Mike Brown, Katie Blackburn, Marvin Lewis, along with every other member of the Bengals management, staff and personnel, state publicly to all Bengals fans, “I will do everything in my power to help the Cincinnati Bengals win a Super Bowl;”

    THAT Mike Brown will hire a general manager, drastically expand the scouting department and relinquish all control of player personnel;

    THAT all training, rehabilitation and medical facilities are considered best-in-class compared to other NFL teams;

    THAT the management fill the team only with players who fit the system, both mentally and physically, and are not reluctant to makes changes to player personnel when needed, regardless of cost or loyalty concerns;

    THAT offensive and defensive line depth is considered the top priority for all player personnel decisions;

    THAT all decisions made by ownership, management, staff and players, both on and off the field, are judged only by this criterion: “Does this help the Cincinnati Bengals win a Super Bowl?”

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« Just to Stir Up Some More Hate... | Main | Cincinnati Hasn't Had This Much To Talk About Since The Danny Farmer Era. »

May 11, 2009

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James Walker is probably the worst person that covers the NFL. His blog is about as one sided as the Daily Show or Fox News. I hate him more than this itchy rash on my taint that won't go away.

To be totally fair, James Walker is a moron. Levi Jones played like an elite LT in 2005. He made Dwight Freeney disappear for 60 minutes. I have no problems with the contract he was given. His release wasn't an example of mismanagement. The choice wasn't "Sign Willie, Levi, or Steinbach." It was "Sign Willie or Steinbach." Levi was a given at that point in history. Playing the hindsight card is lazy, hacky journalism. In other words, what ESPN does.

Okay - but the point is that even a hack? (I guess, I never read James) like this guy remembers the foolish allocation of capital by the Bengals that off season.

Bieniemy- No he probably doesn't remember, considering back then he was covering the Cleveland Cavs. I assure you this guy is really that bad. He just regurgitates what he reads elsewhere. I would be surprised if he didn't use local blogs for the majority of his Bengals coverage.

Also to evaluate, in NFL circles, elite or good offensive tackles are harder to find than good offensive guards. So you know, had the Bengals signed Steinbach instead, people would have bitched about letting a tackle go.

I personally most enjoyed the douchebag Steelers fans chastising one of their own for making Steelers fans look bad and also chastising a "Patriots homer". Yet when the Bengals and Browns fans started posting comments, they acted the exact same way, making them not only Steelers douchebags, but also hypocrites.

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    Bengals Futility - By The Numbers

    • 20 - Years since the Bengals have won a playoff game

      0 - Total number of playoff wins in Mike Brown's tenure as owner

      .359 - Bengals regular season winning percentage since Mike Brown took over as owner (115-206-1 in 20 seasons)

      29-34-1 - Record since 2005 playoff game vs Steelers

      6 - Seasons the Bengals have lost their first six games since 1991. No other team has more than two.

      0 - Teams North of Cincinnati without an indoor practice facility

      10 - Players arrested in a 14 month span from 2005-2006

      32 - Mike Brown's ranking, out of 32, of the "Best Owners in the NFL" by Michael Silver of Sports Illustrated in 2007

      458,000,000 - Amount, in dollars, that Hamilton County Taxpayers paid to build PBS

      2032 - Year that Hamilton County will have finally paid off its debt on the stadium deal

      3 - Total number of non-clerical employees employed in the Bengals scouting department, lowest in the league

      747,000,000 - Amount, in dollars, paid in free agency by the Bengals from 1994 - 2005, second worst of all 28 teams in existence for the duration, behind only Arizona

      118 – Ranking, out of 118 professional teams, of the “Worst Franchises” in professional sports, as ranked by ESPN the Magazine in 2003.

      97 – Ranking, out of 98 general managers in all four major sports with three or more years of experience, of Mike Brown’s performance as a GM, as ranked by Forbes in 2007.

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