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Who Dey Revolution Manifesto

  • Preamble

    IN THIS TIME of perpetual Cincinnati Bengals incompetence and futility, with zero playoff wins in the nineteen seasons since the WhoDeyRevolution Godfather, Paul Brown, passed away in 1991 and handed the team to his fortunate son, the Despot, Mike Brown;

    Introduction

    WE, the members of the Who Dey Revolution, in our fervent dedication to the Cincinnati Bengals and fanatical desire to transform our hometown team into perpetual Super Bowl contenders, call for a popular revolution of fans to demand comprehensive reform to the managerial decisions and approach of Cincinnati Bengals ownership, management, staff and players, and hereby call for the adoption of the following Who Dey Revolution Manifesto:

    Manifesto Demands

    THAT the Mike Brown, Katie Blackburn, Marvin Lewis, along with every other member of the Bengals management, staff and personnel, state publicly to all Bengals fans, “I will do everything in my power to help the Cincinnati Bengals win a Super Bowl;”

    THAT Mike Brown will hire a general manager, drastically expand the scouting department and relinquish all control of player personnel;

    THAT all training, rehabilitation and medical facilities are considered best-in-class compared to other NFL teams;

    THAT the management fill the team only with players who fit the system, both mentally and physically, and are not reluctant to makes changes to player personnel when needed, regardless of cost or loyalty concerns;

    THAT offensive and defensive line depth is considered the top priority for all player personnel decisions;

    THAT all decisions made by ownership, management, staff and players, both on and off the field, are judged only by this criterion: “Does this help the Cincinnati Bengals win a Super Bowl?”

Inaugural Post

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April 30, 2009

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this is the kind of cliched porcine vomit that people are talking about when they say this site's gone to rush limbaugh's taint. you all better hope the season starts soon and that the bengals suck one like you predict because trying to come up with something even remotely intelligent to say in the fill time is a little over your heads. you created this site for one thing, and it's the one thing that we all came here to rally behind: forcing change in the bengals management structure primarily through the elimination of mike brown's decision making powers allowing for a more competitive football team. we've all concluded that the best way to do that is to curb his profit on his private business. stick to the message or risk loosing whatever deserved victories we've all gained.

Hey votasi do the words "ivory tower" mean anything to you? I don't know you but I'm going to go out on a limb and guess that these guys have done a whole lot more than you to force change in the Bengals organization. I thought the whole point of this site is that you were supposed to be able to tell which posts were serious and which were obviously a joke.

While this post is presented in a joke format, the substance behind the post is this. While bringing in a "troubled" player may work in some circumsntaces. You usually need to have the right enviorment so the troubled person can adapt to a different lifestyle. The Bengals do not have that enviorment. In fact, Mike Brown has proven that you can do whatever you want, as long as you are good enough, and you will still have a job. Even if the Head Coach wants nothing to do with you. Take Notes Benard Scott, just have a good preseason then you have free reign. If Marvin ever tries to discipline you, you know where Mikey Boy's office is.

i laid off the detailed analysis of the actual original post because i knew it was a joke...of a post. if leeroy wants to say there's something to actually gain from a more profound meaning, then i'll go ahead and set that garbage straight right now. you're references that grahm and st. louis have some kind of bad influence on the locker room helps your cause none. you're a little homophobe so, you pick on the red-head with the fancy pants and the one guy that is the least disruptive of any player we have? again, you act like chris henry is causing havoc in the locker room. there were plenty of reports from bengals players that were outraged when he was cut in the first place. if anything, chris henry will be an asset to scott in demonstrating how not to start out your career. if you all can make ridiculous claims that henry is poisoning the locker room even today and sitting back with a shit-eating grin saying "i fooled those chumps again, i can do whatever i want", then i can claim that he's on the right track, looking to make something positive of what he's been given again, and can be a mentor in a positive sense for someone like scott. henry realizes how much it has cost him for his previous actions - paychecks, league wide appeal, the chance at a decent 2nd contract when the time comes shortly...

other than that, the bengals have shown little tolerance for stupid behavior especially for late round picks such as nicholson.

other guys with your self-righteous character flaws who haven't done a negative thing off the field since their arrival are frostee-malt, brooks, and big shirley. they haven't done much on the field either, and brooks in now gone, but they weren't the end of the locker room that everyone claimed. in fact, the "good guys", like eric steinback and leon hall have had similar character breaks too. i wish the whole world had a zero tolerance for drunk driving, but in general, your cries that the locker room is out of control and a problem are a bit paranoid given the reality of what's actually happened.

except for chad and levi, these players say they want to be here. i still think chad would be content as can be here if he had more money (something i don't think is warranted, though i'm a huge chad supporter.) the chemistry is not our problem. up until now, we've had lesser talent and lesser coaching. i'm optimistic that our talent is turning around, and at least defensively, our coaching is getting better. hopefully carson's pure talent coupled with a bit of a better line and running game can overcome the downturn of offensive coaching.

stay on mike brown because in the long run, he's a bad bet for good decisions. but avoid the pathetic and fabricated portrayal of a fractured locker room wreaking havoc on our chances and site shayne grahm and brad st. louis as exibits A and B. and if it was a joke, it's just not witty or worth it. this blog can and should be better.

This is a blog. Not the Enquirer, not the Times, not ESPN. This is a bunch of dudes that love football and their home team, but are tired of a losing organization ran by a scrooge. While actively discussing the flaws of said team and what anyone willing to listen can do to protest Mike Brown as an owner, it is still a blog based on a sport riddled with satire. If you didn't think it was funny, fine. But until the stories of locker-room punches at halftime, DUI's, gun charges, bar scuffles, and other circus like behavior have all become just a fleeting memory, then our history of drafting players with previous records will cease to be a subject of ridicule and satire. And while using Brad St. Louis and Shayne Graham as examples is a little off beat, I can only presume they were referenced in a randomly sarcastic manner that you so easily recognized as being a part of a "joke" blog entry. It's not personal, it's satire. Lighten up votasi.

braveduck, thanks for proving the point.

You bring up locker-room punches at halftime, DUI's, gun charges, bar scuffles, and other circus like behavior in your comment.

All of these things are in the past. Have you never done anything wrong in your life? A kid got into a fistfight in college, what a punk.

Tanks guns is a really old story and he is two teams removed from that. Leon Hall's DUI was unfortunate yes, but it does not define the team in the minds of people that actually know what is going on. You are no different than the media that talks about the Bengals and arrests. 31 other teams had a player arrested in between the Bengals last arrest and Hall's DUI.

Over under on when Bernard Scott is first arrested? I'm gonna Jan 15th 2010.

don't joke about Big Red's sequined jean jacket... he'll fucking cut you. I'm serious. This is my serious face.

i see what votasi is talking about... this place has gone from fighting the man, to attacking / criticizing the players. i'm not just talking about this post; obviously its a joke. it's been like this, well, since the season ended. i understand there is only so much material out there, but come on comrades...

(sigh) They never listen...the next thing you know BR is TCOB at TCBY

:)

Jahman, the players were selected by MFB and even ML said MFB makes the final decisions on the players that play on this team so why would you not put down the players who MFB selected? I don't get your point? Now, if these players were playing their hardest and winning, than I am sure this site would not even be here. Do you get this point?

i forgot to add, didn't MFB and ML state a while back that they were going to select character guys without a checkered past? Pffffffffffttttttttttttt

Not happy with the content? Don't fucking read it! Have a good day.

not happy with the bengals style of play - don't fucking get out of bed, turn on the tv, or write about it. move on. have a sweet day ladies.....

obviously that's not the attitude i hope you take. i am not some crazy gop nut-job who says, "you're with us or against us."

someone pointed out a while back that if this site thinks criticizing mike brown will bring about positive change, then by the same logic, criticizing this site's content should bring about better writing/organizing. we don't just follow you because you want it or think you deserve it, and you're not the only one's out there with ideas on the issue of the state of the bengals. you have a comment section, and we're using it. if you wish to just be a tyrannical propaganda piece, then eliminate the comment section and be done.

you also can't have it both ways. you can't say your blog is one of the most informed, competent blogs out there, and then say, "we're not the times, espn, or a legit reporting source". we know you're desperate to fill the time, but you could be filling it with much more productive articles and encouragements about how to limit mike brown's profit. yeah, we get that the article is a joke. it's joke writing, not worth a damn. it has no rationale except tired old cliches and cheap, easy punchlines. it's canned. if this is the kind of shit that gets you a laugh, then you east siders are a bit less sophisticated than you would have us believe.

step up your content or risk losing the momentum you deservedly built up. your readers are intelligent, interested in the real cause, but demand more than this tacky swill.

Or you could lighten up and take these funny articles for what they're worth. The choice is yours.

Fact is, anyone opposed to these writings is a ridiculous homer whether they want to admit it or not. A Mike Brown puppet with one string on your right hand reaching for your wallet.

You can't defend this franchise because they aren't defensible. That's fact. It's not propaganda, canned, cliche', etc, etc....it's fact. It's truth. Yeah, the truth does hurt sometimes. Ya know what? Grow a set.

Steve,

I think you have the wrong idea. To disagree with an article that has no content only some tired old Bengals jokes on a site that was once pretty good does not make someone

"a ridiculous homer whether they want to admit it or not. A Mike Brown puppet with one string on your right hand reaching for your wallet. "

The puppet would be the one that would blindly swallow whatever some blog on the net pushes just because you once agreed with what it was about. Project Mayhem is what pushed the site to fame and it has gone from actual action against Mike Brown to a bunch of old news and joke posts. What happened to the big event at the NFL draft? I heard nothing.

i was wandering if somebody was going to bring up that little void in the credibility of this site. what happened at the draft, big fellas?

yeah, i did accept the shit-stank article for what it was: pig vomit - cause it grunts like a pig and makes me want to vomit...pig vomit.

First, the ability to generate and use knowledge to innovate .

I absolutely love this DPN case.. I have mine in pencil boxes, and they are not in the same place sadly. This would be so nice to have. I hope whomever is lucky enough to receive it treasures it.

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    Bengals Futility - By The Numbers

    • 20 - Years since the Bengals have won a playoff game

      0 - Total number of playoff wins in Mike Brown's tenure as owner

      .359 - Bengals regular season winning percentage since Mike Brown took over as owner (115-206-1 in 20 seasons)

      29-34-1 - Record since 2005 playoff game vs Steelers

      6 - Seasons the Bengals have lost their first six games since 1991. No other team has more than two.

      0 - Teams North of Cincinnati without an indoor practice facility

      10 - Players arrested in a 14 month span from 2005-2006

      32 - Mike Brown's ranking, out of 32, of the "Best Owners in the NFL" by Michael Silver of Sports Illustrated in 2007

      458,000,000 - Amount, in dollars, that Hamilton County Taxpayers paid to build PBS

      2032 - Year that Hamilton County will have finally paid off its debt on the stadium deal

      3 - Total number of non-clerical employees employed in the Bengals scouting department, lowest in the league

      747,000,000 - Amount, in dollars, paid in free agency by the Bengals from 1994 - 2005, second worst of all 28 teams in existence for the duration, behind only Arizona

      118 – Ranking, out of 118 professional teams, of the “Worst Franchises” in professional sports, as ranked by ESPN the Magazine in 2003.

      97 – Ranking, out of 98 general managers in all four major sports with three or more years of experience, of Mike Brown’s performance as a GM, as ranked by Forbes in 2007.

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