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Who Dey Revolution Manifesto

  • Preamble

    IN THIS TIME of perpetual Cincinnati Bengals incompetence and futility, with zero playoff wins in the nineteen seasons since the WhoDeyRevolution Godfather, Paul Brown, passed away in 1991 and handed the team to his fortunate son, the Despot, Mike Brown;


    WE, the members of the Who Dey Revolution, in our fervent dedication to the Cincinnati Bengals and fanatical desire to transform our hometown team into perpetual Super Bowl contenders, call for a popular revolution of fans to demand comprehensive reform to the managerial decisions and approach of Cincinnati Bengals ownership, management, staff and players, and hereby call for the adoption of the following Who Dey Revolution Manifesto:

    Manifesto Demands

    THAT the Mike Brown, Katie Blackburn, Marvin Lewis, along with every other member of the Bengals management, staff and personnel, state publicly to all Bengals fans, “I will do everything in my power to help the Cincinnati Bengals win a Super Bowl;”

    THAT Mike Brown will hire a general manager, drastically expand the scouting department and relinquish all control of player personnel;

    THAT all training, rehabilitation and medical facilities are considered best-in-class compared to other NFL teams;

    THAT the management fill the team only with players who fit the system, both mentally and physically, and are not reluctant to makes changes to player personnel when needed, regardless of cost or loyalty concerns;

    THAT offensive and defensive line depth is considered the top priority for all player personnel decisions;

    THAT all decisions made by ownership, management, staff and players, both on and off the field, are judged only by this criterion: “Does this help the Cincinnati Bengals win a Super Bowl?”

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April 24, 2009


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No Corners? Seriously? So you're cool with David Jones playing the nickel? Who plays left tackle? You seem awfully dissatisfied with Levi, why not take a guy who played at a high level for a top tier program for a top tier college coach? And, aren't O-linemen supposed to be large? Like everything alse about the combine and pro days, way too much was made of a fat guy being fat.

if you are implying that chris henry doesn't produce on the field because he wasn't on the field a lot, then ok. if you are implying that last year's stats when he was on the field are an indication that he can't produce for the bengals, then you don't understand football. if you're implying that chris henry has never produced on the field for the bengals, then you're a filthy pig and can't be trusted. when the rest of the offense has a sound foundation, chris henry's skills are exactly what the bengals need and he's on the "good" side of 6. we'll all wait and see if he's on the field this year, but i'm looking forward to it.

POUM - I can pretty much guarantee you that a large majority of the 31 other teams would not sign Chris Henry, even now.

In fact, ALL 31 TEAMS decided not to sign Chris Henry. One did, however. All the author is saying is that Knox is willing to block, runs good routes, makes all the catches, and will actually be on the field to produce. You should work for the fit right in with their philosophy of picking players.

Curse of Bo - It doesn't matter if Deion is back there...if there is no line to get pressure on the QB...the corners will be toast regardless. I'm not saying I'm in love with David Jones playing nickel...but I'd rather that than no one stopping the run or pass on the d-line. The Steelers, Patriots, etc. have made a freaking living in the playoffs on borderline guys like David Jones in the secondary because their pass rush and d-lines are so strong.

casper the friendly little fairy ghost, you have no evidence that all 31 teams passed on chris henry. your arguments are pathetic because they come with an undeserved air of authority and expertise that is clearly fluff and puff. bring something solid to the table or keep playing footsy with the big boys in the comment section.

Nice and all but make another selection for Round 5 because Herman Johnson will be gone in the second. In reference to David Jones, what about Simeon Castille and/or Jamar Fletcher?

We seriously passed on Monroe??? I knew Andre "Moobs" Smith was our pick from Jump Street, but we should have drafted Monroe(who went #8 to Jacksonville). Refuckindiculous

danimal (that's about as unoriginal as refuckindiculous),

you're no daisy. you're no daisy. poor unfortunate soul, just a little high strung, that's all. just a common knob slobber of the rest of the punks on this site. who gives a baker's fuck if an offensive lineman has titties. he the consensus elite player of the four tackles touted. he has only a marginal past with poor professionalism (he's a college junior for christ's sake), but he's never been a malcontent, an egomaniac, or a common criminal.

i must say you all live in a dark place and stress is a killer. i think it's that shitty bar that you hole up in in d.c. every week. the bottom feeders. we got the talent needed at the critical position. get a girlfriend and stop going to church - you're unwarranted pessimism is making my penis soft.

I don't give a fuck if he does have titties. My gripe is that our staff isn't professional enough to motivate the guy to play at a high level in the pros. Chances are he's likely to take the money and run with it(Think Levi Jones) because no high caliber player wants to play for the Bengals(or the other team in Ohio for that matter). BTW the consensus best tackle(after the combine and pro days) was Jason Smith, who went #2. Andre was still in the top three after a bad combine and pro day. I'm not saying Andre Smith isn't talented, I'm more or less summing up 18 years of failure with three words that define unprofessionalism. MIKE FUCKING BROWN.

I do hope the tape doesn't lie. Andre Smith was a beast at Bama.

And I drown my sorrows at a shitty bar in Findlay, Ohio(The hometown of Worthlessberger), thank you very much.

I also have a girlfriend and don't go to church(agnostic). We still need a motherfucking center. That better be the top priority of Day 2.

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    Bengals Futility - By The Numbers

    • 20 - Years since the Bengals have won a playoff game

      0 - Total number of playoff wins in Mike Brown's tenure as owner

      .359 - Bengals regular season winning percentage since Mike Brown took over as owner (115-206-1 in 20 seasons)

      29-34-1 - Record since 2005 playoff game vs Steelers

      6 - Seasons the Bengals have lost their first six games since 1991. No other team has more than two.

      0 - Teams North of Cincinnati without an indoor practice facility

      10 - Players arrested in a 14 month span from 2005-2006

      32 - Mike Brown's ranking, out of 32, of the "Best Owners in the NFL" by Michael Silver of Sports Illustrated in 2007

      458,000,000 - Amount, in dollars, that Hamilton County Taxpayers paid to build PBS

      2032 - Year that Hamilton County will have finally paid off its debt on the stadium deal

      3 - Total number of non-clerical employees employed in the Bengals scouting department, lowest in the league

      747,000,000 - Amount, in dollars, paid in free agency by the Bengals from 1994 - 2005, second worst of all 28 teams in existence for the duration, behind only Arizona

      118 – Ranking, out of 118 professional teams, of the “Worst Franchises” in professional sports, as ranked by ESPN the Magazine in 2003.

      97 – Ranking, out of 98 general managers in all four major sports with three or more years of experience, of Mike Brown’s performance as a GM, as ranked by Forbes in 2007.

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