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Who Dey Revolution Manifesto

  • Preamble

    IN THIS TIME of perpetual Cincinnati Bengals incompetence and futility, with zero playoff wins in the nineteen seasons since the WhoDeyRevolution Godfather, Paul Brown, passed away in 1991 and handed the team to his fortunate son, the Despot, Mike Brown;


    WE, the members of the Who Dey Revolution, in our fervent dedication to the Cincinnati Bengals and fanatical desire to transform our hometown team into perpetual Super Bowl contenders, call for a popular revolution of fans to demand comprehensive reform to the managerial decisions and approach of Cincinnati Bengals ownership, management, staff and players, and hereby call for the adoption of the following Who Dey Revolution Manifesto:

    Manifesto Demands

    THAT the Mike Brown, Katie Blackburn, Marvin Lewis, along with every other member of the Bengals management, staff and personnel, state publicly to all Bengals fans, “I will do everything in my power to help the Cincinnati Bengals win a Super Bowl;”

    THAT Mike Brown will hire a general manager, drastically expand the scouting department and relinquish all control of player personnel;

    THAT all training, rehabilitation and medical facilities are considered best-in-class compared to other NFL teams;

    THAT the management fill the team only with players who fit the system, both mentally and physically, and are not reluctant to makes changes to player personnel when needed, regardless of cost or loyalty concerns;

    THAT offensive and defensive line depth is considered the top priority for all player personnel decisions;

    THAT all decisions made by ownership, management, staff and players, both on and off the field, are judged only by this criterion: “Does this help the Cincinnati Bengals win a Super Bowl?”

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« Pro Football Talk Calls Out The Bengals | Main | Bill Cowher's Racist Psychotic Chin Surfaces At League Meeting »

March 24, 2009


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Good post. This guy is interesting and you're right, there probably is something in his contract that stipulates that he won't get paid if he gets injured outside of football. The thing is is that I don't think he cares. I don't think that Dhani cares if Dhani gets hurt because football isn't his life or biggest interest. The dude travels, writes poetry and rides a bike to the Bengals' facility. He's either a HUGE ladies man or swings the other way--can't tell for sure. Love the line about Chad--so true. If Chad wasn't such a mental midget, wasn't all about himself and didn't have Drew Rosenhaus chirping in his ear, he'd be an entertaining guy to watch on a show.

as I watched the show last night I was thinking the exact same thing....and I can openly admit that I do like the show, despite the whole ann arbor thing...

Ok, the last comment on that weblink intrigues me in the way that "Carson Palmer is intrigued by Jerome Simpson," to quote Hobspin. Did Dhani honestly play bass in the subway? That ... is ..... awesome.. If it actually happened.

Dhani is a yolked Anthony Bourdain. Did anyone else notice during last night's episode during a scene where Dhani says he will win 2 matches and the giant Swiss guy says he will only win 1, that they made a little wager? The Swiss guy says that if he wins he wanted 2 Super Bowl tickets. Dhani kind of chuckled and walked away. I don't thing the huge Swiss country man realized that he had as good of a shot at winning 2 Super Bowl tickets from Dhani as Dhani had of winning 2 Super Bowl tickets from the huge Swiss country man.

I read on another Bengals board where a guy saw the first show and Dhani said, "this is tougher than training camp" or "this is worse than two-a-days". LOL Marvin runs a tough camp, I tell you. LOL No wonder they get injured all the time and are never in shape and get pushed around. Dhani is telling the truth on his show.

I thought that Dhani's comments were directed as much to the heat and humidity in Thailand and they were to the intensity of the kick-boxing workout.

Bengals players need all the good publicity they can get. Thanks, Dhani, for fighting the thug perception.

I was just trying to imagine what a Swiss sumo wrestler looks like when I pulled a brain hammy.

Wow, a Bengal defensive player with intelligence and culture. What do you think will happen as soon as Mikey boy finds out about that?

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    Bengals Futility - By The Numbers

    • 20 - Years since the Bengals have won a playoff game

      0 - Total number of playoff wins in Mike Brown's tenure as owner

      .359 - Bengals regular season winning percentage since Mike Brown took over as owner (115-206-1 in 20 seasons)

      29-34-1 - Record since 2005 playoff game vs Steelers

      6 - Seasons the Bengals have lost their first six games since 1991. No other team has more than two.

      0 - Teams North of Cincinnati without an indoor practice facility

      10 - Players arrested in a 14 month span from 2005-2006

      32 - Mike Brown's ranking, out of 32, of the "Best Owners in the NFL" by Michael Silver of Sports Illustrated in 2007

      458,000,000 - Amount, in dollars, that Hamilton County Taxpayers paid to build PBS

      2032 - Year that Hamilton County will have finally paid off its debt on the stadium deal

      3 - Total number of non-clerical employees employed in the Bengals scouting department, lowest in the league

      747,000,000 - Amount, in dollars, paid in free agency by the Bengals from 1994 - 2005, second worst of all 28 teams in existence for the duration, behind only Arizona

      118 – Ranking, out of 118 professional teams, of the “Worst Franchises” in professional sports, as ranked by ESPN the Magazine in 2003.

      97 – Ranking, out of 98 general managers in all four major sports with three or more years of experience, of Mike Brown’s performance as a GM, as ranked by Forbes in 2007.

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