WDR Ruling - Attending Road Games is Acceptable

Dipping into the reader mailbag, we receive a good question from Ken, a Bengals fan in California.  Ken writes:

I am a douchebag. 

I am a huge fan of your site and all that you are trying to accomplish.  I am a California Bengal fan and have been since 1982.  Having a son of my own, who is now 14, I have ensured the cycle of douchebagedness will continue into the next generation.

If I were to adhere to all objectives of your manifesto, am I able to travel to cities that my beloved Bengals play on the road?  How does this impact "son of Paul" and the coffers of his family?...

Ken brings up an interesting point.  As you probably know, we have launched Project Mayhem Task #8 calling for a Bengals' season ticket boycott.  But with regard to road games, while revenue from club seats and suites are not shared with the NFL, revenue from ticket sales are.  So a portion of the NFL revenue relating to ticket sales of other teams will indeed go to Mike Brown.  Should that stop you from attending road games?  Our answer is a qualified No...just don't go to really horrible games that aren't going to sell out anyway and be sure to spread the revolution while you're on the road.  Before our critics cry hypocrisy, please consider a few things...

First, we are not trying to take down the rest of the NFL and any efforts we make to get people to stop going to games in other cities would be futile.  I mean would we, as Bengal fans, factor in the financial effects of our opponent when considering whether to attend a game?  We certainly would not.  Plus can you imagine this, "Hey New York Jets fans...don't go to the Bengals vs. NY Jets game because our team really sucks and part of the money you spend on tickets will go to our horrible owner."  Behavior like this might result in the NY Jets fireman going Patrick Bateman (or WT Steeler fan) on your ass.  (Quick side note...I looked at our opponents for the 2009 season on Bengals.com to determine which team to use as an example.  How quickly did they get the Bengals' 2008 season record and final AFC North standings off of the main page of the web site?  Apparently, 4-11-1 didn't happen after all folks.)

Secondly, and somewhat related to the first point, it is highly unlikely that any road games a reasonable person would actually want to travel to will not sell out anyway.  Next year, the Bengals play at Baltimore, Cleveland, Pittsburgh, San Diego, Green Bay, Minnesota, Oakland and New York.  I, personally, will be either attending San Diego or Green Bay (depending on which way the schedule falls).  Our guess is that most, if not all of the road games, will sell out.  The Raiders game could be blacked out but if you visit there, you run the risk of traveling cross country only to get stabbed and/or watch a terrible football game between the Raiders and Bengals.  And if it turns out that we are playing next year's version of the 2008 Detroit Lions or St. Louis Rams (who were both subject to regular season blackouts) on the road, we advise against going to such games because (a) you are about to drive 5+ hours, spend money on a hotel and tickets to witness an abortion, and (b) those extra tickets you're buying that no one else would buy if you hadn't gives Mike Brown revenue.

In WT layman's terms, it's also the funnest shit ever.  Last year, Comrades Stalin and Buck met up with me in Dallas.  The tailgate alone made the trip (in addition to the Texas state fair, a round of golf and a weekend full of alcohol consumption).  Before we knew it, we had a crowd of 75+ people tailgating with us before the game. 

We do realize that the "funnest shit ever" factor can't solely be relied on as that arguably would allow us to continue to purchase tickets for home games.  More importantly...attending road games allows us to spread the word about WDR across the nation and bond with fellow die hard douche bags in commiseration.  Normally, we are fairly limited to displays in the city of Cincinnati and the Internet.  While we occasionally produce something that is picked up nationally, we should continue to use road games as opportunities to spread the revolution across the country.  In Dallas, by merely talking with numerous Bengal fans and Cowboy fans at the tailgate, we were able to spread the word.  Certain fans took it to a new level through direct communication with the Browns.  We also launched a Project Mayhem Task in Indianapolis this year during our game against the Colts.  While the game was not fun, the tailgating again was and we were able to spread our message further west. 

So in sum, the position we endorse is: By all means, attend road games if you wish but avoid games that will not be sold out anyway and when you get there, spread the revolution.  You certainly can count on a few massive tailgates at road games this year organized by WDR (as well as more Mayhem at those games). 

Comments

[Sleeping With Bieniemy]

Yes, our panel of judges hath spoken. Revolutionaries are encouraged to travel far and wide to spread the revolution.

As I understand the revenue sharing agreement, the visiting team gets 40% of the gate revenue.

Thus, when the Bengals are away, if you purchase a ticket for that game from the box office itself (not from ebay, stubhub, scalper or whatever) 40 cents of that dollar goes to the Bengals.

Considering the number of Bengals fans traveling to away games is small (in the hundreds and perhaps a few thousand total in any given year) and there is a high probability that those games will be sold out already...the effect of Bengals fans attending road games does not matter enough financially to impact the Bengals.

[Wyatt]

I'm a lifelong Bengals fan who grew up in the heart of the Evil Empire (about 35 miles north of Pittsburgh), but due to my job (Health and Safety for an environmental company), I travel all over the country. This past season, I was on hand in Giants Stadium for probably the best game the Bengals played all season, and I wouldn't pass up that opportunity again, especially since I bought my ticket from Stubhub.

The best part of the whole day? Either the fact that only one Giants fan in a stadium full of them told me I should just kill myself (while the Bengals were still winning!) or the guy with the Ocho Stinko sign (he made it onto the television broadcast SEVERAL times) asking me after the game what Chad had during the game.

Ocho Stinko Guy (OSG): What'd Ocho Stinko do? 3 receptions, 47 yards?
Me: What'd Plaxico do in the first four quarters? 2 receptions, 17 yards?
OSG: Your team lost!
Me: Nice comeback, douche.

(And, at that point, a bunch of Giants fans laughed and OSG slinked off, dejected.)

[Capt. Steve-O]

I went to both New York games this past year, and both Jets and Giants fans were very hospitable and friendly (maybe they were sympathetic to our plight?) I only ran into one or two jackasses who had any smartass remarks. A string of drunken profanities and insults shot that down (my friends' laughter helped as well).

Either way, don't boycott the away games. In the grand scheme of things it doesn't mean shit and its fun to go to different stadiums around the league. Instead hurt Mikey Boy's pockets at home.

[Who Dey NYC]

Dallas fans were incredible to us...friendly, welcoming, sympathetic.

Seahawks fans (from the year before), surprisingly enough, are absolutely terrible.

[Capt. Steve-O]

Also, as a followup to my last post... going to away games and interacting with opposing fans in the stadium and in the parking lot is a great opportunity to spread the Gospel of the Revolution. Blow this shit up across the Nation. Testify!!!!

[Bolshevik Bengal]

I have found most fans of other teams to be pretty cool about the Bengals. I live in DC and have gone to three Bengals-Ravens games, and the worst I ever got was a "Bengals suck," by a drunken guy as he sheepishly walked by and didn't look me in the face. Steelers fans talk a lot of shit, but generally, they don't do anything too bad.

Eagles fans are another story. They will literally assault you in their stadium. I was at an Eagles-Cowboys game in Phily three years ago, and a guy wearing a Cowboys' jersey was at one of the urinals: no joke, two Eagles fans come up on either side of him and dump their beers on him while he's taking a piss. I think he had his son with him, too. What a bunch of a-holes!! I've heard Pats fans (Boston in general) are pretty terrible, too.