Dan Rooney, longtime owner of the historically successful Pittsburgh Steelers, took the time to respond to Project Mayhem Task #7: WhoDey Revolution's letter to NFL Commish Roger Goodell asking him to intervene to force the Bengals ownership to stop taking advantage of the NFL's generous revenue sharing and work to field a competitive team.
Rooney, whose team has beaten the Bengals 8 times in the last 10 games and 10 of the last 14, seems to think that the "Bengals do everything the can to be a successful team." Really? Everything they can? Like having the smallest scouting department in the NFL? The Steelers have 11 full time player personnel staff - the Bengals have 3. Or being the team furthest North without an indoor training facility? Or undercutting your coaches authority by signing the exact troubled player they publicly stated they don't want back on the team?
So, sorry Mr. Rooney, the Bengals are certainly not doing "everything they can" to be successful. If things don't change, Mr. Rooney, your Steelers can expect two more easy wins a year.
If you were the stillers, would you want the Bengals to change?
Posted by: Comrade 78 | January 08, 2009 at 08:49 AM
Rooney sends Mike Brown flowers every Valentines Day. Brown then buys a new card and gives those to his wife. It is their little secret.
Posted by: Leeroy Jenkins | January 08, 2009 at 10:32 AM
Leeroy you have it all wrong. Mike Brown actually takes the card he gets from the Ravens and gives that to his wife...along with the Steelers flowers.
Posted by: Ghost of Boomer | January 08, 2009 at 10:49 AM
Allow me to translate:
"Dear Andrew,
I got wind of the publicity your website was receiving so I decided that I better actually answer the mail this week. I see you making points that are completely accurate and threaten the teacup ride that my team gets in the AFC North division and I don't like it.
The Bengals do everything they can to gift-wrap two wins for us on an annual basis. It is not easy in the NFL and I enjoy taking whatever breaks I can get against someone who isn't willing to acknowledge just how hard it is.
I believe that by offering a vague "sometime soon" sentiment on when the Bengals will turn the corner, the Cincinnati sheople shall be pacified and will continue to throw money into the NFL and Brown coiffers respectively.
I wish you would take down the website and go make fun of the Reds or something,
Dan Rooney"
Posted by: BMN | January 08, 2009 at 11:19 AM
Wow BMN, that's exactly as how I read it!
Posted by: WhoDeyFSU | January 08, 2009 at 11:43 AM
Rooney is still giggling over that letter.
Posted by: Flash | January 08, 2009 at 12:57 PM
It's not easy in the NFL blah blah blah.
Ok who gave Katie the Steelers stationery? After all we don't know how hard it is to run an NFL franchise; and neither does she.
Posted by: Comrade Robert | January 08, 2009 at 01:57 PM
Rooney is clearly old and senile if he seriously believes Mike Brown’s Bengals are turning it around. But, we have to respect that he, or one of his underlings, took the time to respond to a group of fans who don't generate his family direct revenue. Yes, they get money from us in the NFL revenue sharing plan, but, we don't buy beers at Heinz Field and we sure as shit don't buy their merchandise.
WDR fans used to buy season tickets, beers, and Bengals merchandise. In my wildest dreams Mike Brown would never recognize our existence, outside of mentioning we want to “pillory” him via billboards. He doesn’t recognize us and we would all love to give him lots of our money, albeit changes must be made.
Thank you for your time Mr. Rooney. As for Mike Browns Bengals winning, Rooney is loony.
Viva!
Posted by: Ho Chi Maier | January 08, 2009 at 03:02 PM
This type of response would be expected of fellow AFC North owners. Since they are guaranteed to play the Bengals twice per year, the easy wins outweigh the welfare they must provide Mikey.
However, if another owner responds, like one from a team in a large market who markets well (say, Jerry Jones), expect the letter to be less sympathetic to the Brown Family.
Posted by: Sleeping With Bieniemy | January 08, 2009 at 04:04 PM
Might it be possible that you are being conned?
Posted by: realist | January 08, 2009 at 06:21 PM
Dear Mr. Rooney,
So your saying if you owned the Bengals you wouldn't change anything?
Posted by: Ned | January 09, 2009 at 11:09 AM
Who's Andrew?
Posted by: g3 dood | January 09, 2009 at 02:44 PM
Andrew, you are great, I love what you have done as the face for WDR. This is going to be a huge difference maker for the Bengals.
However, I think it was kind of dumb to think Dan Rooney would help us out.
Allow me to translate this letter:
Dear Andrew:
Blah Blah Blah, Generic Business/NFL owner response Blah blah blah, I am the owner of the Steelers why would I try to help you out, blah blah blah, I laugh at the thought that you would think I am a human being with morals, blah blah blah, the steelers have been so good because every other team in the division suck regularly, blah blah blah, you DO realize I don't like your organization I hope, blah blah blah, I hope you are fornicated by the holiday rapist, blah blah blah.
Dan "Smarter than the AVERAGE fish" Rooney
Come on man, maybe the Packers guy will help out, maybe the guy who succeeds goodell (being that goodell is the worst owner in NFL history) will help, maybe the Cardinals guy would help. But don't expect Art Modell, Dan Rooney, or whoever the Browns guy is to help us out. You can send the letters, we have nothing to lose really, but don't get your hopes up from help from these guys, they would be horribly unpopular in their cities if they did
Posted by: K. Phelps | January 12, 2009 at 10:34 PM
Of course he's not going to criticize Mike Brown. They all stick together. You won't get anything out of asking the other owners for help. Your best bet is make the Bengals lose money by helping keep the stadium empty and the concession stand silent. Then Mike Brown might sell the team to someone who cared about winning or who wasn't an incompetent buffoon of an owner. Maybe.
Posted by: MikeBrownIzzaClown | February 24, 2009 at 02:15 AM