NFL Team Success Since 1991

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Who Dey Revolution Manifesto

Preamble
IN THIS TIME of perpetual Cincinnati Bengals incompetence and futility, with zero playoff wins in the nineteen seasons since the WhoDeyRevolution Godfather, Paul Brown, passed away in 1991 and handed the team to his fortunate son, the Despot, Mike Brown;

Introduction

WE, the members of the Who Dey Revolution, in our fervent dedication to the Cincinnati Bengals and fanatical desire to transform our hometown team into perpetual Super Bowl contenders, call for a popular revolution of fans to demand comprehensive reform to the managerial decisions and approach of Cincinnati Bengals ownership, management, staff and players, and hereby call for the adoption of the following Who Dey Revolution Manifesto:

Manifesto Demands

THAT the Mike Brown, Katie Blackburn, Marvin Lewis, along with every other member of the Bengals management, staff and personnel, state publicly to all Bengals fans, “I will do everything in my power to help the Cincinnati Bengals win a Super Bowl;”

THAT Mike Brown will hire a general manager, drastically expand the scouting department and relinquish all control of player personnel;

THAT all training, rehabilitation and medical facilities are considered best-in-class compared to other NFL teams;

THAT the management fill the team only with players who fit the system, both mentally and physically, and are not reluctant to makes changes to player personnel when needed, regardless of cost or loyalty concerns;

THAT offensive and defensive line depth is considered the top priority for all player personnel decisions;

THAT all decisions made by ownership, management, staff and players, both on and off the field, are judged only by this criterion: “Does this help the Cincinnati Bengals win a Super Bowl?”

January 07, 2009

Following up on Brosef's post on the Cardinals now having 2 playoff wins in their history compared to the Bengals 0, I wanted to highlight some statistics a helpful reader* compiled for each NFL team since 1991:

Number of Superbowl Wins
Number of Playoff Appearances
Number of Winning Seasons

The table can be found in, you guessed it, another Excel file (I love Excel files): Download NFL Wins Since 1991

The data includes all teams that existed in some form or another since 1991, so it does not control for expansion teams or teams that lost their franchise. For you poor bastards who do not have Excel, here's the punchline:

Of all NFL teams, we have the fewest winning seasons and playoff appearances (1 each) combined except the lowly Texans who have none (in existence for only 7 seasons).

*I lost the email from this helpful reader, please identify yourself in the comments or send us an email at whodeyrevolution@gmail.com so we can give you credit. Thanks for the hard work.

Posted by Sleeping With Bieniemy on January 07, 2009 at 04:50 PM | Permalink

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This is one of the more depressing Excel files I've seen, outside my 401(k). thanks. I think.

Posted by: Leo deTrotskyo | January 07, 2009 at 07:24 PM

Makes me want to take a bottle of Jack Daniels and a shotgun out in the middle of a field...

Posted by: GregC69&78 | January 08, 2009 at 08:16 AM

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Bengals Futility - By The Numbers

20 - Years since the Bengals have won a playoff game

0 - Total number of playoff wins in Mike Brown's tenure as owner

.359 - Bengals regular season winning percentage since Mike Brown took over as owner (115-206-1 in 20 seasons)

29-34-1 - Record since 2005 playoff game vs Steelers

6 - Seasons the Bengals have lost their first six games since 1991. No other team has more than two.

0 - Teams North of Cincinnati without an indoor practice facility

10 - Players arrested in a 14 month span from 2005-2006

32 - Mike Brown's ranking, out of 32, of the "Best Owners in the NFL" by Michael Silver of Sports Illustrated in 2007

458,000,000 - Amount, in dollars, that Hamilton County Taxpayers paid to build PBS

2032 - Year that Hamilton County will have finally paid off its debt on the stadium deal

3 - Total number of non-clerical employees employed in the Bengals scouting department, lowest in the league

747,000,000 - Amount, in dollars, paid in free agency by the Bengals from 1994 - 2005, second worst of all 28 teams in existence for the duration, behind only Arizona

118 – Ranking, out of 118 professional teams, of the “Worst Franchises” in professional sports, as ranked by ESPN the Magazine in 2003.

97 – Ranking, out of 98 general managers in all four major sports with three or more years of experience, of Mike Brown’s performance as a GM, as ranked by Forbes in 2007.

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January 07, 2009