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Who Dey Revolution Manifesto

  • Preamble

    IN THIS TIME of perpetual Cincinnati Bengals incompetence and futility, with zero playoff wins in the nineteen seasons since the WhoDeyRevolution Godfather, Paul Brown, passed away in 1991 and handed the team to his fortunate son, the Despot, Mike Brown;

    Introduction

    WE, the members of the Who Dey Revolution, in our fervent dedication to the Cincinnati Bengals and fanatical desire to transform our hometown team into perpetual Super Bowl contenders, call for a popular revolution of fans to demand comprehensive reform to the managerial decisions and approach of Cincinnati Bengals ownership, management, staff and players, and hereby call for the adoption of the following Who Dey Revolution Manifesto:

    Manifesto Demands

    THAT the Mike Brown, Katie Blackburn, Marvin Lewis, along with every other member of the Bengals management, staff and personnel, state publicly to all Bengals fans, “I will do everything in my power to help the Cincinnati Bengals win a Super Bowl;”

    THAT Mike Brown will hire a general manager, drastically expand the scouting department and relinquish all control of player personnel;

    THAT all training, rehabilitation and medical facilities are considered best-in-class compared to other NFL teams;

    THAT the management fill the team only with players who fit the system, both mentally and physically, and are not reluctant to makes changes to player personnel when needed, regardless of cost or loyalty concerns;

    THAT offensive and defensive line depth is considered the top priority for all player personnel decisions;

    THAT all decisions made by ownership, management, staff and players, both on and off the field, are judged only by this criterion: “Does this help the Cincinnati Bengals win a Super Bowl?”

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« Curious about Project Mayhem Task #6? | Main | Bengals/Redskins Live Blog »

December 14, 2008

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Now THAT's Classic. You can now get pissed off at Mikey Boy Brown -- literally!

Fantastic work and greate idea, it is nice to have people take action to try to change the culture of this team. Fan complacency is the downfall of this team. If all fans roundly rejected MB..who knows.

Awesome idea

Janitors kept taking my cakes out of the stalls

Janitors kept taking my cakes out of the stalls

Great work. Nice also to hear that the band members of Bush are cranking it up at PBS at every opportunity. The 'ball may not be great, but there's legendary music going on. I've been to FedEx Field the last time the Skins and Bengals played, and having visited PBS twice this season, you can see how the Brown family have no sense or willingness to run a modern-day commercial organisation. One thing is the quality on the field, one thing is it off-the-field and it's sad to see they can put together the pieces of the puzzle.

Great work. Nice also to hear that the band members of Bush are cranking it up at PBS at every opportunity. The 'ball may not be great, but there's legendary music going on. I've been to FedEx Field the last time the Skins and Bengals played, and having visited PBS twice this season, you can see how the Brown family have no sense or willingness to run a modern-day commercial organisation. One thing is the quality on the field, one thing is it off-the-field and it's sad to see they can put together the pieces of the puzzle.

Section 314 bathrooms were patrolled by 2 "employees" who removed all the cakes.

Great idea. That was the last thing I expected to see today...besides a "W". The bathrooms near 333 had most of the cakes removed by the time I was in there during the 3rd quarter.

Great idea. That was the last thing I expected to see today...besides a "W". The bathrooms near 333 had most of the cakes removed by the time I was in there during the 3rd quarter.

So let me get this straight. You bunch of dumbasses actually spent money on urinal cakes for the Bengals? Turn around and look in the mirror. Look at who is really getting pissed on. It's you you bunch of fools.

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Great idea, unfortunately so much of the yellow was due to the $7 beers that pads Mike's pockets even more.

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Those cakes tasted horrible.

Mike Brown only wants the cash he dont care about a winning team the NFL needs to do something about a team owner who suck like Mike Brown

Both this site and the urinal cake idea are exceptional. Who is the brains behind this outfit?

This note is to Ty. Your comments are messed up. Look at the publicity this stunt has provided. The Bengals management got the message. Next time you might want to think before you write.

Do you really think you know MB...I DO NOT think so... your action will not help the team... go to the games and cheer them on that will help...

I have to give props, that is one of the funniest things I've ever see

Some are charming, some are seducing, like the candy, chocolate, the cakes, and some burn everything like fire, as soon as you get near.

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Do you definitely believe you already know MB...I DO NOT believe so... your activity will not assist the team... go towards the video games and cheer them on which will help..

I don’t have anything else to include on to your article – you basically spelled everything out. great read.

At twenty years of age , the will reigns; at thirty , the wit ; and at forty , the judgment .

Fantastic work and greate idea, it is nice to have people take action to try to change the culture of this team. Fan complacency is the downfall of this team. If all fans roundly rejected MB..who knows.

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We bless you with the remembrance of beauty.*

Janitors kept taking my cakes out of the stalls

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Where should their loyalty lie and what should be the consequences of their actions ?

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it is nice to have people take action to try to change the culture of this team. Fan complacency is the downfall of this team. If all fans roundly rejected MB..who knows.

Suite101 is definitely a long-term planning sort of thing. I had to take a break writing there last year, but I’m still paid every month on the articles I already wrote. If you look at how much you make on an article in a month or two, it’s not much, but when you look at how much you make over a year or two it starts to add up. There are better paying gigs out there, but it’s nice to be able to write whatever you want, whenever you want.

This jack-ass can apologize from now until hell freezes over but it doesn’t excuse what he said and what he did. The very thought that he could have done this as a “joke” among his friends says more then he’d care to reveal about him AND his friends if he thought they’d find it humorous. He’s also, or should be, well aware of the power of tweets and the Internet and that his absolutely thoughtless and un-civilized comments would be picked up, so I don’t buy his “few seconds” defense of his actions. This is part of who he really is and as always these expressions of deep personal feelings come to the surface in most unexpected circumstances.

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Fan complacency is the downfall of this team. If all fans roundly rejected MB..who knows.

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    Bengals Futility - By The Numbers

    • 20 - Years since the Bengals have won a playoff game

      0 - Total number of playoff wins in Mike Brown's tenure as owner

      .359 - Bengals regular season winning percentage since Mike Brown took over as owner (115-206-1 in 20 seasons)

      29-34-1 - Record since 2005 playoff game vs Steelers

      6 - Seasons the Bengals have lost their first six games since 1991. No other team has more than two.

      0 - Teams North of Cincinnati without an indoor practice facility

      10 - Players arrested in a 14 month span from 2005-2006

      32 - Mike Brown's ranking, out of 32, of the "Best Owners in the NFL" by Michael Silver of Sports Illustrated in 2007

      458,000,000 - Amount, in dollars, that Hamilton County Taxpayers paid to build PBS

      2032 - Year that Hamilton County will have finally paid off its debt on the stadium deal

      3 - Total number of non-clerical employees employed in the Bengals scouting department, lowest in the league

      747,000,000 - Amount, in dollars, paid in free agency by the Bengals from 1994 - 2005, second worst of all 28 teams in existence for the duration, behind only Arizona

      118 – Ranking, out of 118 professional teams, of the “Worst Franchises” in professional sports, as ranked by ESPN the Magazine in 2003.

      97 – Ranking, out of 98 general managers in all four major sports with three or more years of experience, of Mike Brown’s performance as a GM, as ranked by Forbes in 2007.

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