Comrades, douchebags - are you going to the game this Sunday in Indy? You know the Bengals are 1-10-1 and Mike Brown thought Odell Thurman was going to start at LB this year, right? Fear not, for Project Mayhem Task #5 will be taking place inside Lucas Oil Stadium in Indianapolis this Sunday, comparing the Colts' success with the Bengals' failures.
We need all fellow comrades going to the game in Indy to help. I can not release details publically, but this is totally legal, within the stadium rules and will attract local and national attention to our cause. If you want to help, please email us at whodeyrevolution@gmail.com and we will provide you with all the information.
What is the task? It will have a bigger effect if it isn't revaled to the public until game day. And don't forget about Rule #2 of Project Mayhem: Don't ask questions about Project Mayhem.
As I am sure that many of you know, Mike Brown and Jim Irsay are quite similar - both owners were given control of the team upon their fathers death. The big difference? Jim Irsay recognized he wasn't the right person to make player personnel decisions so he hired Bill Polian to become the GM. And while the Bengals over the last 18 years have the worst record among every team in all 4 major sports over this span, the Colts under Irsay/Polian are one of the most successful NFL franchises ever.
Project Mayhem Task #5 will point out that the Colts are successful because the ownership are not making football decisions and because of their robust player personnel department.
Let's briefly compare the Colts and Bengals scouting departments, as Comrade Jenkins did in April. The Colts player personnel department has 21 staff. The Bengals has 8, two of whom are Mike Brown's relatives (Pete and Paul Brown), 3 are "consultants" (meaning they don't actually do any scouting), and the whole organization is led by Jim Lippincott, whose job before becoming the Director of Football Operations was as the Assistant Athletic Director at Moeller HS. It is this braintrust that counts on Odell Thurman and David Pollack to be the 2008 starting linebackers and thinks that one scout for the entire Southeastern United States is sufficient.
So, Comrades, if you are going to Indy and want to do your part to help spread the Revolution, email us at whodeyrevolution@gmail.com and we will provide you with all the information.
I wish I could be there. Whatever you guys are doing, do it big! VIVA LA REVOLUCION!!!
Posted by: Comrade 78 | December 04, 2008 at 11:46 AM
Thank you guys for a reason to watch the game this Sunday... Im a Douche Bag
Posted by: Brendon | December 04, 2008 at 03:31 PM
I can not wait to see what you glorious douchebags are up to.
Posted by: Rich | December 04, 2008 at 05:06 PM
Best of luck! This sounds like an elaborate plan, which excites me :-)
BMN
Posted by: BMN | December 04, 2008 at 06:32 PM
I imagine Mike Brown won't even watch the game. Why should he? It doesn't matter to him as long as he has money to count and dreams of drafting Beanie Wells 2nd overall next year, giving all the OSU fans the chance to buy Bengals jerseys and other merchandise as well as tickets to watch their favorite RB get wrecked in the backfield.
Posted by: Keith | December 05, 2008 at 10:38 AM
A buddy of mine is going to the game. He is volunteering. Just showed me the materials he was sent. Absolute Genius! Everybody needs to watch on Sunday.
Posted by: Eric | December 05, 2008 at 04:36 PM