Guest Post of the Week: Mike Brown is Communist

We here at WDR have adopted the communist theme to represent us fans as an oppressed proletariat revolting against a ruthless, bourgeois owner. But as this guest post points out, maybe MB is the real Communist.

Mike Brown is a Communist

 

Okay, just in case you weren't already convinced, here is some rock-solid evidence that Mikey is a treasonous commie…

-Communist regimes are usually ruled with an iron fist by a dictator-like leader who has a delusional view of his own abilities and refuses to listen to the sanity of others - Mike Brown - check. 

 

-Communist leaders often employ their family and cronies regardless of ability to do the job -   Pete, Katie, Troy, Bill, Duke, Lippi - check. 

 

-In a communist government, there is often little oversight, so workers keep their jobs despite immense ineptness or lack of effort and ability – Brat, Marvin, Chris Perry, The Human Inverse Pancake Machine, the entire roster – check. 

 

-Communism encourages mediocrity; everyone does some work and then shares in the wealth.  This discourages some from being productive members of society and doing their fair share because others will pick up the slack and they will still get their share of the wealth – Chris Henry, Mike noting he wants to be "competitive" and have "adequate" scouting (never says anything about winning), Mike pontificating that Super Bowl winning franchises don't make as much money, etc. – check. 

 

-Communist leaders often embellish/revise the history books in order to support their own propaganda – Mike Brown leaving out the fact that the Bengals were 0-4 WITH Carson this year, Mike Brown acting as if it were a surprise that David Pollack and Odell Thurman aren't his starting line backers this year – check. 

 

-Communism restricts the freedom of speech – no anti-Bengal signs in PBS (or in visiting stadiums if Katie is around) – check. 

 

-Communist regimes often control the press and spin coverage – Baghdad Hob – check.

 

-Communist leaders sometimes find it necessary to flex their power to show they are in control, even if it isn't the best thing for their people – Mike Brown refusing a dream trade offer, instead deciding he would rather hold Chad hostage – check.       

There are numerous other examples, but I think that is enough evidence to show that Mike Brown is undeniably a big ole Russian communist.

 

Yours in Revolution,

 

Brother Adam

 

Comments

[Tremain Crack]

Brother Adam makes a lot of valid points, but I think it's actually more of an aristocracy than communism. I think ultimately you have power that is maintained by a hereditary elite. A family dynasty if you will. And probably the worst aristocrats ever to grace professional sports. So as far as I'm concerned...the Mike Brown Regime should be referred to as Ass-ristocraps.

[Scott Ricketts]

It's a fucking kleptocracy. This cocksucker takes our fucking money and takes the NFL's fucking money and because he's a member of the goddam lucky sperm club, he thinks he's just entitled to sit around on his fat sore-ridden ass and rub them on his flaccid inoperable penis all day.