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Who Dey Revolution Manifesto

  • Preamble

    IN THIS TIME of perpetual Cincinnati Bengals incompetence and futility, with zero playoff wins in the nineteen seasons since the WhoDeyRevolution Godfather, Paul Brown, passed away in 1991 and handed the team to his fortunate son, the Despot, Mike Brown;


    WE, the members of the Who Dey Revolution, in our fervent dedication to the Cincinnati Bengals and fanatical desire to transform our hometown team into perpetual Super Bowl contenders, call for a popular revolution of fans to demand comprehensive reform to the managerial decisions and approach of Cincinnati Bengals ownership, management, staff and players, and hereby call for the adoption of the following Who Dey Revolution Manifesto:

    Manifesto Demands

    THAT the Mike Brown, Katie Blackburn, Marvin Lewis, along with every other member of the Bengals management, staff and personnel, state publicly to all Bengals fans, “I will do everything in my power to help the Cincinnati Bengals win a Super Bowl;”

    THAT Mike Brown will hire a general manager, drastically expand the scouting department and relinquish all control of player personnel;

    THAT all training, rehabilitation and medical facilities are considered best-in-class compared to other NFL teams;

    THAT the management fill the team only with players who fit the system, both mentally and physically, and are not reluctant to makes changes to player personnel when needed, regardless of cost or loyalty concerns;

    THAT offensive and defensive line depth is considered the top priority for all player personnel decisions;

    THAT all decisions made by ownership, management, staff and players, both on and off the field, are judged only by this criterion: “Does this help the Cincinnati Bengals win a Super Bowl?”

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December 23, 2008


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don't feel bad I did root this weeks since they were playing browns but this week I hope we get creamed!! Lets have some change

I don't know... I can't find it in me to root against the Bengals. Plus what is a high draft choice going to get us? Another Mike Brown Draft Bust? Remember Akili Smith? I don't think that the Bengals are ready for such a huge responsibility of making a smart draft, and by huge responsibility I mean task that requires some brains. If we DO infact get a GM, especially the man rumored to be getting looked at, then maybe a high Draft Choice will actually be helpful, but untill we improve everywhere I still am not comfortable rooting for a team against the Bengals.

You had me, but the last paragraph was a deal breaker. To ask someone to root against the team of which they are fans of is stupid. High draft pick or not, you always want your team to win.

only delusional masochists root for their team to win a meaningless game now that will cost them the shot at a better draft pick next year.

of course the bengals would screw that up regardless, so as with everything in bengaldom, it does not matter.

^ Yeah, whatever you say, brah. Wait, so, you are trying to tell me I'm delusional because I want my team to win?

You are missing the big picture here. The draft is a crap shoot anyway you look at it. You never know what you are going to get from a top pick. Obviously, it's easy to point fingers at the past Bengals drafts. You argue for a top pick, thus losing, because you think a top 3 pick is surefire, blue chipper. What makes you think the Bengals brain trust is going to get that one right? I argue for winning out / finishing strong, picking in the 5 to 7 range. It's probably a safer pick. Side note: What about a Curry pick at 5 - 7?

The key... We are a young team, they need all the PT they can get. Face it, if Marvin can still coach the guys up for win the last 3 games, there is still some hope for next year. My fingers are crossed that MFB does make some changes, as rumored. We will have to see if they come to pass.

look i get that most on this site just dismiss all unfortunate happenings with the bengals as mike brown's fault, but there's on instance that gets repeated over and over again that can bring a team down and usually ignorant twats are trying to pin it on an owner/GM: injuries.

you all do realize that this is a full-contact sport and when a player goes down you don't get to armchair QB it up and say, "told you all along that guy would be a bust" happens. it happens when nobody touches a player. it's the nature of sports and this sport in particular. they didn't screw up the draft of kijana carter, david pollack, or anybody else that was lost due to injury.

the other stuff, yeah, you can make great cases for not making smart draft-day decisions: small school/raw 2nd rounders, undisciplined locker-room nightmares, projects with potential. but the injuries are not an appropriate place to hammer on the management, even if you say we have substandard medical facilities and staff...if you recall, this is the same team that had players like willie, rudi, chaddy, and justin smith go for years in wear/tear positions without missing any games. even carson had a stretch where he was the only QB in the league to take every snap one year...

the draft is a crap shoot. but you might as well have as many choices as possible and not let your division rivals block you from a potential long-term answer to some of your problems. this game is absolutely meaningless to both squads. it's no big deal if they lose, and i'm going to come down on the side of rooting for them to win, but not even caring the slightest bit or holding it against anything or anybody if the lose (and no, i don't think a team would ever lose a game on purpose...)

Matt Millen* is still available, he can't do worse than Mikey B...wait a sec

*sarcasm intended. If this happened, I would seriously contemplate a slow and painful suicide.

But on a less sarcastic note, We need a GM who is a Reputable football mind. Or we chip in on Mega Millions tickets, Hopefully win with a large jackpot, reinvest the money for a year or two and buy the damn team ourselves.
Either way Mikey B needs to relinquish all football related ops.

Fuck, I meant to post that in a different thread

In case you were wondering, this phenomenon of terrible Bengals teams ending with wins near the end is called the "Dead Cat Bounce." We all thought this year was too bad to have one. Oops.

This was perhaps the funnies, saddest and most painfully appropriate post I've seen on here in a long time. Bravo!

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    Bengals Futility - By The Numbers

    • 20 - Years since the Bengals have won a playoff game

      0 - Total number of playoff wins in Mike Brown's tenure as owner

      .359 - Bengals regular season winning percentage since Mike Brown took over as owner (115-206-1 in 20 seasons)

      29-34-1 - Record since 2005 playoff game vs Steelers

      6 - Seasons the Bengals have lost their first six games since 1991. No other team has more than two.

      0 - Teams North of Cincinnati without an indoor practice facility

      10 - Players arrested in a 14 month span from 2005-2006

      32 - Mike Brown's ranking, out of 32, of the "Best Owners in the NFL" by Michael Silver of Sports Illustrated in 2007

      458,000,000 - Amount, in dollars, that Hamilton County Taxpayers paid to build PBS

      2032 - Year that Hamilton County will have finally paid off its debt on the stadium deal

      3 - Total number of non-clerical employees employed in the Bengals scouting department, lowest in the league

      747,000,000 - Amount, in dollars, paid in free agency by the Bengals from 1994 - 2005, second worst of all 28 teams in existence for the duration, behind only Arizona

      118 – Ranking, out of 118 professional teams, of the “Worst Franchises” in professional sports, as ranked by ESPN the Magazine in 2003.

      97 – Ranking, out of 98 general managers in all four major sports with three or more years of experience, of Mike Brown’s performance as a GM, as ranked by Forbes in 2007.

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