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Who Dey Revolution Manifesto

  • Preamble

    IN THIS TIME of perpetual Cincinnati Bengals incompetence and futility, with zero playoff wins in the nineteen seasons since the WhoDeyRevolution Godfather, Paul Brown, passed away in 1991 and handed the team to his fortunate son, the Despot, Mike Brown;

    Introduction

    WE, the members of the Who Dey Revolution, in our fervent dedication to the Cincinnati Bengals and fanatical desire to transform our hometown team into perpetual Super Bowl contenders, call for a popular revolution of fans to demand comprehensive reform to the managerial decisions and approach of Cincinnati Bengals ownership, management, staff and players, and hereby call for the adoption of the following Who Dey Revolution Manifesto:

    Manifesto Demands

    THAT the Mike Brown, Katie Blackburn, Marvin Lewis, along with every other member of the Bengals management, staff and personnel, state publicly to all Bengals fans, “I will do everything in my power to help the Cincinnati Bengals win a Super Bowl;”

    THAT Mike Brown will hire a general manager, drastically expand the scouting department and relinquish all control of player personnel;

    THAT all training, rehabilitation and medical facilities are considered best-in-class compared to other NFL teams;

    THAT the management fill the team only with players who fit the system, both mentally and physically, and are not reluctant to makes changes to player personnel when needed, regardless of cost or loyalty concerns;

    THAT offensive and defensive line depth is considered the top priority for all player personnel decisions;

    THAT all decisions made by ownership, management, staff and players, both on and off the field, are judged only by this criterion: “Does this help the Cincinnati Bengals win a Super Bowl?”

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September 12, 2008

Douchbag Fun

As the Bengals prepare for their home opener against the Titans to the lowest expectations in 26 years, WDR would like to remind Bengals fans what Mike Brown can't ruin - your ability to tailgate your faces off.  Even during the dark years when cornhole was only played on the West Side, Bengals fans could be counted on to show up early, drink multiple Hudy Delights and Little Kings beverages and consume German sausages of every color and flavor.

The tailgate before the game is often the highlight of the Bengals game - and WDR wants to celebrate this hallowed pastime.

So, stealing a bit from Barstool Sports,  we want you to send us pictures from Sunday's game of hot chicks spotted at the tailgate and the game, as well as some Bengals Douchbags dominating the tailgate. 

Email us pictures at whodeyrevolution [at] gmail [dot] com.

 

This is similar to the "Fan Fun" feature on Bengals.com except more awesome. 

WDR Comrdes, Mike Brown may be able to ruin your team - but he'll never take your ability to dominate a tailgate.

Examples of some sweet pictures to take and send us below the jump.

Fat_dude_2

Bengalsfannudesafeforwork

Inside220051030fan

Ept_sports_nfl_experts3882116671207


Posted by on September 12, 2008 at 11:00 AM in Game Day, Taking the Who Dey Revolution to the People |

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Please post the youtube link to the girl flashing in the stands. Thanks in advance.

Best Regards,

Internet perve

Posted by: Bohica | September 12, 2008 at 02:32 PM

The comments to this entry are closed.

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    Bengals Futility - By The Numbers

    • 20 - Years since the Bengals have won a playoff game

      0 - Total number of playoff wins in Mike Brown's tenure as owner

      .359 - Bengals regular season winning percentage since Mike Brown took over as owner (115-206-1 in 20 seasons)

      29-34-1 - Record since 2005 playoff game vs Steelers

      6 - Seasons the Bengals have lost their first six games since 1991. No other team has more than two.

      0 - Teams North of Cincinnati without an indoor practice facility

      10 - Players arrested in a 14 month span from 2005-2006

      32 - Mike Brown's ranking, out of 32, of the "Best Owners in the NFL" by Michael Silver of Sports Illustrated in 2007

      458,000,000 - Amount, in dollars, that Hamilton County Taxpayers paid to build PBS

      2032 - Year that Hamilton County will have finally paid off its debt on the stadium deal

      3 - Total number of non-clerical employees employed in the Bengals scouting department, lowest in the league

      747,000,000 - Amount, in dollars, paid in free agency by the Bengals from 1994 - 2005, second worst of all 28 teams in existence for the duration, behind only Arizona

      118 – Ranking, out of 118 professional teams, of the “Worst Franchises” in professional sports, as ranked by ESPN the Magazine in 2003.

      97 – Ranking, out of 98 general managers in all four major sports with three or more years of experience, of Mike Brown’s performance as a GM, as ranked by Forbes in 2007.

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