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Who Dey Revolution Manifesto

  • Preamble

    IN THIS TIME of perpetual Cincinnati Bengals incompetence and futility, with zero playoff wins in the eighteen seasons since the WhoDeyRevolution Godfather, Paul Brown, passed away in 1991 and handed the team to his fortunate son, the Despot, Mike Brown;

    Introduction

    WE, the members of the Who Dey Revolution, in our fervent dedication to the Cincinnati Bengals and fanatical desire to transform our hometown team into perpetual Super Bowl contenders, call for a popular revolution of fans to demand comprehensive reform to the managerial decisions and approach of Cincinnati Bengals ownership, management, staff and players, and hereby call for the adoption of the following Who Dey Revolution Manifesto:

    Manifesto Demands

    THAT the Mike Brown, Katie Blackburn, Marvin Lewis, along with every other member of the Bengals management, staff and personnel, state publicly to all Bengals fans, “I will do everything in my power to help the Cincinnati Bengals win a Super Bowl;”

    THAT Mike Brown will hire a general manager, drastically expand the scouting department and relinquish all control of player personnel;

    THAT all training, rehabilitation and medical facilities are considered best-in-class compared to other NFL teams;

    THAT the management fill the team only with players who fit the system, both mentally and physically, and are not reluctant to makes changes to player personnel when needed, regardless of cost or loyalty concerns;

    THAT offensive and defensive line depth is considered the top priority for all player personnel decisions;

    THAT all decisions made by ownership, management, staff and players, both on and off the field, are judged only by this criterion: “Does this help the Cincinnati Bengals win a Super Bowl?”

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« Week 4 Semi Live Blog 1st Half | Main | Bob Bratkowski must love Tecmo Bowl »

September 28, 2008

2nd Half Live Blog

So far the Bengals have played 30 minutes of football like a "Professional Football Organization."  The 2nd half will be decided by the battle in the trenches and one big play on special teams/defense.  I have been pleased with the play of the Bengals O line.  Not great, but not terrible.  The defense has been capitalizing on the Browns inability to throw the ball, and need to come up with a turnover in the 2nd half.  My prediction, Bengals 13 Browns 10.

2:35: And the Browns come up with that special teams play I am talking about.  The D needs a stop.

2:40: Geathers with a great play.  He needs to do that more often.  Time to bring some pressure and make a play.

2:41: CHINNEDUNDUMMDNNDMD NDUKWE!!!!!!!!!!!!  WDR's favorite Bengal continues his great game. 

2:43: Time for the Bengals to get nasty and grind out a drive.  If I am Marvin, I tell this O line, the game is on you.  We are going to run right, run left, and run up the middle. 

2:44: Bratkowski is not listening to me, and 2 straight first down throws to Chad and TJ.  Followed by a 7 yarder to TJ.  Bengals picking up the pace and trying to loosen up the D.

2:46: Shaun Rogers just mauled Ghiaciuc.  Honestly, he just pushed him back 4 yards and ran Chris Perry down on a sweep.  God, we could have had him.  I just rewound and watched the play 3 times, just un fricking believable how much Shaun Rogers owned Ghiaciuc. 

2:48: Nice punt by Larson, the D needs to be careful not to get over aggressive here.

2:49: If the Browns don't move the ball here, are we going to see Brady Quinn? 

2:50: Braylon Edwards is a little bitch.  He looked like a pissed off 6 year old who just got his favorite toy taken away.  First Brady Quinn shot of the game.......get ready.

2:51: Nice play the D there....3rd and 4 and you run the ball??  The Browns just want Derek Anderson off the field as soon as possible.  Get ready Brady, your turn to run this shit of a franchise.

2:53: We need to get a little misdirection in our running game, counters, traps, maybe an end around.  I don't trust Fitzy to throw the ball down the field, and we can't run straight at Browns D.

2:56: LOVE that 3rd down pass by the Bengals.  Rarely do you see them run a play where a receiver is wide open.  The o line gave Fitzy enough time for TJ to run a slow drag across the middle and lose the zone.  We need to get back to running the ball.  I know its hard, but just do it.

2:58: Rich Gannon says what I said in the 1st half.  Fitzpatrick is NOT comfortable in the pocket, we need to move him around.  Eric Ghiaciuc just wiffed on a block on a screen pass. It looked like Perry had some room to run.  If he is the best option we have at center........

3:00: Derek Anderson is still the QB.  If I was a Brown fan (gross), I would be mad.  I hope Chinnendumdn hits Braylon Edwards real real hard.  He went to Michigan and plays for the Browns, I can't think of anything worse.  (Maybe LaMar Woodley for Pittsburgh, but he doesn't late hit as much as Braylon).

3:03: Robert Geathers has made a couple nice plays, but he just misses a tackle on Jamal Lewis that would have stopped him for no gain.  He ends up gaining 8, those are the types of plays that Geathers needs to make if he wants to make the leap from an average player with potential to a great player.

3:04: Bengals use their 2nd time out because they can not match personnel.  There is a reason why we are 0-3, coaching is a big one.

3:06: The Browns are doing what I want the Bengals to do.  Just keep running the ball and get ugly.  They have bigger cahones and it may win the game.

3:07: Bengals last two 3rd downs.  They call a timeout AFTEr the Browns just had a timeout, and then give up a 9 yard rush.  Then, they line up offsides and negate an INT.  Wow...just wow.

3:09: Why is it that every year, for the last 20, the Bengals can not guard the TE.  Kellen Winslow picks up his 3nd catch for a first down, and is there any doubt he is going to make 3 more big catches this game?  Ugh....

3:14: Why are the Bengals always a half step away when they blitz?  3rd and 3 pass to the backup running back for 8 yards.  And the BENGALS USE THEIR LAST TIME OUT.  What the fuck? 

3:15: Honestly, what the fuck do our players and coaches do all week?  How can they not get the right personnel on the field over and over again.

3:17: Damnit.  Braylon Edwards abuses Leon Hall.  I wonder if we even called a defensive play.  This drive is it for the season.  If they don't move the ball here, you can kiss any hope of mediocrity goodbye.  Are you confident?  Do you think the Bengals are? 

3:19: There is one team playing worse than the Bengals.  My fantasy team.  So far, I have lost 3 fumbles and scored 0 TDs.  Awesome.

3:21: Dear Bob Bratkowski,

Please put this game on your highly paid offensive line.  Do not make the backup QB who has played like garbage win the game.  Tell Chris Perry that he will get the ball on 1st, 2nd, and 3rd down.  Tell the offensive line to get nasty, get a hat on a body and push some mother fuckers around.  If they can't get a first down, you know what kind of team you have.  Do not call some stupid ass 3 yard pass route to Reggie Kelly.  I will punch myself in the face.

Dearest,

LeeRoy Jenkins

3:23: Chris Perry up the middle for 6 yards and a FUMBLE.  That is what kind of team we have.  Long live the Revolution.  I hate Michigan.

3:24: Kellen Winslow for 20 yards...NO WAY!!!!!  Seriously, the Tight End caught a pass against the Bengals. 

3:25: FUMBLE!!  Does anyone want to win this game? And the Browns recover....in fact I think they gained 3 yards on the fumble.

3:26: Nice play by Geathers and the Bengals actually covered Kellen Winslow.  I think it was Johnson and Rivers...but I am not sure.  He was doubleteamed and it was a one man route....big 3rd down here.

3:28:  With the 2nd pick in the 2009 NFL draft (St. Louis will have the 1st), the Cincinnati Bengals select, Terrence Cody, Defensive Tackle University of Alabama.  Damnit....he is only a sophomore.  Well.....ummm I don't know who to pick.

3:31: How about KC beating Denver.  Looks like its St. Louis and the Bengals competing for the first pick.

3:34: Why are we throwing the ball to Antonio Chapman when he is doubleteamed?  Are Chad and TJ really not open? 

3:35: TJ still fighting for every extra yard.  Is there any chance we resign him? 

3:36: TD Chad, and he doesn't make an ass of himself after.  We still have the 2 pt converstion for him to do something stupid.  Bengals are back in this game (maybe).  If the Bengals come back, Cleveland may burn down.

3:39: Ghiaciuc gets blown up again.  Time for the D to make a play.

3:41: Do you know what may help Cincinnati win this game.  A timeout to stop the clock.  Oh yeah, about those.......

3:42: Bengals jump offsides and the Browns get the first down anyway with a pass to Kellen Winslow...I don't know which one I am more surprised about.  tick tick tick tick

3:43: Fanene just beats Joe Thomas....who would rather be fishing.   tick tick tick tick

3:44: The stadium is EMPTY.  It was full, and with 4:41 left, down by 5, a third of the upper deck is empty.  Cincinnati is fed up with this football team.  Fanene comes up with another TFL.  tick tick tick tick

3:46: Bengals will get the ball back with 3 minutes left and no timeouts.  The defense has played well.....and the Browns offense is awful.  Right now, the difference in the game is Chris Perry's inability to hold onto the football.

3:48: Tick tick tick tick tick tick FUCK!!!!!!!!!!!

3:49: Stacey Andrews has spent too much time watching Levi Jones: sack, fumble, game over.

3:51: Where do you go from here?  If you are Marvin (or Mike Brown), what do you do?  I am not sure what the right answer is, but I know what the wrong answer is.  Do NOT say we lost because Carson was hurt.  Do NOT say we played well, but came up just short.  Do NOT say it was a missed call here, or a fumble there.  Do NOT say we need to be more consistent.  If I do not here this quote from Marvin Lewis, or something like it, I will have lost all confidence in this team.

"The performance you saw today was not good enough.  The fans deserve more.  We did not earn our paychecks today, and we will not rest until this team is a Super Bowl contender.  There is no excuse for losing.  We need to do better, and we will.  Thank you for your support of this organization."

3:55: FG, game over.  I am now watching Red Zone HD.  Thank you for reading this blog, and please please please support the Revolution.  I love this team too much to let it fail.  WE need to demand change.  WE NEED to demand success. We can not become complacent.  WE need to be persistent in our criticism, we need to hold our team to the highest possible standard.  Join the Revolution.

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What's Marvin going to say? The Dline and Oline are getting beaten like little girls? Ghiacuic spent more time on his back than a bankokian whore? That's what he means when he says that stuff, but he can't go on TV and say it directly, you take your team to task in private. Fact is you can make chip dip out of sheep shit and that's what we have right now. All the preseason would be's and could be's didnt amount to jack shit. Now we suffer this year, and blow everything up again. Fact is, when your a crappy football team, you can't do much to save it in the middle of the season.

it is tough to find 3 wins the rest of the season after the turd the Bengals just dropped.

Well,
I guess the 3 interceptions to 1 TD that Fitzpatrick has pretty much should shut down any argument that Palmer should be benched.
Whoa is me.

No fire. These guys are a fucking joke. They get less upset about these games they I get about losing a game of Madden (it never happens, but still, I would be furious). The worst part about this team is that no one has flipped his shit--they are just like, "Oh well, no big deal." Pathetic.

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MikeyBoy Brown Twitter Updates

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    Bengals Futility - By The Numbers

    • 17 - Years since the Bengals have won a playoff game

      0 - Total number of playoff wins in Mike Brown's tenure as owner

      .348 - Bengals regular season winning percentage since Mike Brown took over as owner (97-181 in 17 seasons)

      15-23 - Record since 2005 playoff game vs Steelers

      6 - Seasons the Bengals have lost their first six games since 1991. No other team has more than two.

      0 - Teams North of Cincinnati without an indoor practice facility

      10 - Players arrested in a 14 month span from 2005-2006

      32 - Mike Brown's ranking, out of 32, of the "Best Owners in the NFL" by Michael Silver of Sports Illustrated in 2007

      458,000,000 - Amount, in dollars, that Hamilton County Taxpayers paid to build PBS

      2032 - Year that Hamilton County will have finally paid off its debt on the stadium deal

      6 3 - Total number of non-clerical employees employed in the Bengals scouting department, lowest in the league

      747,000,000 - Amount, in dollars, paid in free agency by the Bengals from 1994 - 2005, second worst of all 28 teams in existence for the duration, behind only Arizona

      118 – Ranking, out of 118 professional teams, of the “Worst Franchises” in professional sports, as ranked by ESPN the Magazine in 2003.

      97 – Ranking, out of 98 general managers in all four major sports with three or more years of experience, of Mike Brown’s performance as a GM, as ranked by Forbes in 2007.

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