2008 Bengals Slogans

Feel free to add to these as they are what the Bengals seem to be operating under. 

"No GM... No Problem!"

"It's still 1968, right?"

"Anthony Munoz used to play for us."

"Doing less with more since 1990."

"4-and-2, crucial play of the game, we haven't been able to run up the middle all game.  I know!  Let's run up the middle."

"Where players who have done something wrong in previous lives go."

"Hey, we made the playoffs... like... three years ago.  What else do you want?  Greedy bastards!"

"Where 'poking Mike Brown with a stick during games to keep him awake' is someone's full-time job."

"Competitive on the field of play."

"Where Indianapolis, Pittsburgh, Kansas City, Cleveland, Buffalo, Jacksonville, and New Orleans are HUGE MARKET TEAMS!  New York, Chicago, and Boston are GINORMOUS MARKET TEAMS!  And Cincinnati is a tiny town that happens to have a football team.  We don't know where Green Bay is, you probably just made that place up." 

"Where our owner makes C. Montgomery Burns look lucid and benevolent."

"Paul Brown's team.  Remember him?  You don't?  He was good!  Trust us!"

"Where Chad Ocho Cinco can show up to practice naked and nothing would happen."

"Proud contributors to Marvin Lewis' alcoholism."

"Hey!  Is that a negative fan-made sign!"

"Average attendance: Pittsburgh fans - 14,000; Bengal fans - 38,000; Ohio State fans - 10,000; Kentucky fans - 3000"

"Our mission: to play so bad you have to be drunk to watch us.  Beer prices at PBS: $7."

"We couldn't beat USC - University of South Carolina."

"Since this is supposed to be a baseball town, why should we care?"

"Because you're too dumb to know any better."

"Our only goal: mediocrity.  Current status: suck!"

"We don't care, we don't have to; we know you're not REALLY going to cheer for the Colts."

Comments

[Sleeping With Bieniemy]

"Come to PBS. Give us your money. Get kicked in the balls."

[Rich]

The Cincinnati Bengals: We're better than having colon cancer!

[Scott Simons]

Bengals football: such a good product, Hamilton County will love paying for it

[JMo]

Bengals football: Lie, cheat and steal to be mediocre.......

[JMo]

8-8 is gr8!!!!!

[JMo]

Cincinnati Bung-holes....rectums on the river.

[JMo]

Cincinnati Bengals..Were striving to break even just makes good business sense.

Paying#1 picks is costly so the aquisition of a weightroom at this time would be shall we say premature?

Mike Brown= Bill Lumberg

Carl Pickens Clause= TPS Reports

Skyline Chili- Enhancing Bengals fans ulcers since 1968!

Mike Brown thinks victories are something he has to claim on his taxes

[JMo]

Cincinnati Bengals- Finishing Under-the-Rhine since 1968!

[Who Dey NYC]

Come to Paul Brown Stadium you enormous douche bag

[JohnM]

From a Cincinnati native recently transplanted to Denver...

What kills me is that it was so easy to embrace the Rockies and forsake the Reds, yet I can't do the same with the Bengals. (I had embraced the Rockies almost immediately, although the whole World Series thing didn't hurt.) Both the Reds and the Bengals are in about the same position, neither has won a playoff game/series since I was a child and both have brought year after year of irrational hopes and unprecedented quantities of disappointment. Isn't Carson Palmer the second coming of Ken Griffey Jr? So much talent but will never see a Championship game anywhere except from the comfort of the living room? Yet I'm stuck with the Bengals. They are always losers, but not in the fun Chicago Cubs kind of way, but rather the neighbor kid that is 3 years younger than you pushing your face into a pile of dogshit every Sunday kind of way. It's obviously an addiction and there needs to be a rehab for it. We spend tons of money feeding it and all we get out of it is feeling worse than the day before. Every Sunday is worse than the one before it. Every Sunday that you see a Bengals fan is the worst Sunday of that fan's life. (I would throw Monday in there but it's not like the NFL would waste another prime time game on these losers) Even with the occasional win, all it accomplishes is the rekindling of that microscopic spark of hope that maybe this is the turning point, only to be doused with a fire hose the following week by 250+ yards & 2 touchdowns by a backup QB making his first ever NFL start.

What can I say? I can't see the 2008 season as being anything but an inevitable "rock bottom" for me. If there isn't a major shake up of players and front office during or after this season, I have no choice but to jump ship. I cannot continually punish myself and continue to pay money to do so for much longer. I am a broken fan with little left to give.

[SCOTTY FRAZER]

GO BENGALS! AND TAKE THE REDS WITH YA!

[braddey]

shit on that last comment..... if u can "jump ship" you are not a fan and we dont want you.... go watch the fucking patriots or somthin..... that fag will prolly be back next year after all !!!!.... it hurts me to drive a couple states to see my team loose but i dont bitch about it, one year soon we will have this goddamnit.....

who dey

[Daniel Venrick AKA the Danimal]

Cincinnati Bengals... Hey, at least we're not the Lions.

Hey we set a team record this year...unfortunately it was for most players on IR in a single season

Welcome to PBS...where hopes and dreams are only 2-34 seconds away from being fulfilled.

[Daniel Venrick AKA the Danimal]

"Isn't Carson Palmer the second coming of Ken Griffey Jr?"

To answer that question, I say this

Yeah, Carson Palmer is in every way the second coming of Griffey Jr. He played awesome the first two or three seasons, then he got hurt really bad and now he's getting hurt all the time...just like Griffey. It's sad that the last time I saw a playoff win that I got psyched about seemed like a millennium ago...wait...it was.