I'm never usually pumped up going into the Bengals season, but this year has all the droppings of magic that a team needs to achieve greatness. Strife? Check. Dissension? Check. Injuries? Checkmate.
The Bengals are going to go 17-2 this year. I love watching this team and all of their lovable idiosyncracies. Can't block for Carson, not problematic at all. Can't rush the passer? Doesn't matter because pass rushers don't win games, wide receivers do. You may say that the Bengals are all about style and not enough about substance, but at the end of the day, style is the one going home to rail the prom queen. And the Bengals are that prom queen. Style picked us to rail, and goddamnit, railed we shall get.
When I look at the schedule, I don't even know where our two losses will come from.
The Ravens don't own an offensive unit. They rent.
The Titans are about three receivers and a sidearm throwing motion short of a good football team.
The Giants haven't been good since LT was snorting coke off of Bill Parcell's jugs.
The Browns freaking folded a couple years ago, which is always a sign of a good football team/town.
The Cowboys don't have any weapons, shutout city.
The Jets? Brett Favre knows what we do to unsuspecting quarterbacks. We send a belligerently drunk fan out on the field to steal the ball from him while he's driving on us. He's still rattled, that ones in the bag.
Steelers, we've never lost to them at home, or on the road for that matter, in fact, didn't they forfeit their two games against us last year?
Jaguars and Colts, come on, AFC South sucks, cake.
The other four games, Chiefs, Redskins, Texans, Eagles, are all roadapples on our way to a perfect season.
Correction, the Bengals are going 19-0 this season. Suck on that popsicle, Tom "Don't Bust In My Eye" Brady.
This is the best post I have ever read on this site. FINALLY, someone who understands that our awful defense will be totally revitalized with a new D Coordinator, a DE who has not played a down in preseason and a rookie LB. And if they are still terrible, when has a strong defense ever led to wins? Carson will just throw for 500 yards a game! And who cares if we have a weak offensive line, I learned playing Tecmo Bowl that if doesnt matter how far the QB runs back from center, he can still throw it 100 yards.
SUPER BOWL BABY!!!!
Posted by: Andrew Simon | August 28, 2008 at 01:25 PM
Haven't you ever heard the phrase, "Offense wins football games"? Guess not. Chris Henry is the progical son sent back to save our city by running deep post corners.
PS I think I saw that cheerleader at Hofbrauhaus
Posted by: KY UK KY | August 28, 2008 at 06:54 PM
"Clear eyes, full hearts, can't loose."
-Chris Henry
Posted by: KY UK KY | August 28, 2008 at 06:56 PM